"Are you going to do something?" We were seated with the other passengers, our weapons (my revolver and Nidget's silly little crossbow) were sitting amongst a pile of other passengers weaponry (most people ride trains with weapons, as this little robbery proved we should). We were in the lead car crammed in with a bunch of other people, there were six robbers, only one of them was not outwardly showing signs of corruption. They looked to have been lead by an ugly lady with crazy eyes, who appeared to actually be completely corrupted (as in a crazy magic user) which was weird because from my experience when you are corrupted you crazy town, not you know robbing people on a train.
"Sure Nidget I'll use magic on people who are bathed in it, its not like that could possibly fail on me." Corrupted people aren't immune to magic most of the time, but I have run across some who can seemingly eat it, which is terrifying in a way I don't have to explain.
"We can't just sit here Trezlan they are planning on robbing us." They were of course, going from passenger to passenger taking things from people, two of their number were also I assumed going to the luggage compartment and stealing from there.
"Do you have a plan? I mean other than 'Do Something'?"
"No, but if they take my cards we'll be screwed."
"You're cards?" I was intrigued, we were going to Lork for some competition, I didn't realize Nidget planned on just outwardly cheating to win, I mean I should have assumed that, but you know sometimes I give him the benefit of the doubt.
"YOU SHUT UP!" The scream came from the corrupted leader, it referenced that she was indeed bat shit crazy, her scream pierced my ears to the point of drawing blood (not even kidding). Nidget looked at me with concern and I shrugged my shoulders, whatever was going to happen was going to happen.
And happen it did.
Friday, August 31, 2012
Thursday, August 30, 2012
Ride The Train
I like riding on a train I'm not currently incarcerated on. Its sad I have to put that stipulation on there, but my life is sad what can I say! I like just the thump of train wheels, and the joy of going someplace different, even if its someplace you've been a lot you don't know maybe it all got painted pink, or blown up, or everyone now looks like a chicken (these are not suggestions cruel universe please don't do them to me). The other ncie thing about train travel is that if you pay enough you can have a private room that you can then sleep in during a longer trip. Supringly Nidet had done just this (whoever he stole the tickets or the money from I'll never know/never care about). It was nice to be traveling in style even if it meant being stuck with Nidget. I was actually resting comfortably when the train stopped.
"Are we there already?" My mouth had a taste I'd rather not put to words, needless to say, it was nasty.
"No I heard someone say there is something on the tracks."
"Great now we'll be delayed." I went to go back to sleep when I heard the distinct sound of a weapon being fired.
"Was that a gunshot?" Nidget is hilarious in his naiveness.
"Either that or the oddest sounding fart I've ever heard." Nidget looked at me sour, and then fetched his crossbow from a nearby bag.
"You know they have pistols even for shorties."
"They aren't as reliable as my crossbow."
"Let me guess you fired a pistol once and it hurt your hand and so you'll never do it again."
"Won't even dignify that with a response." I chuckeled to myself and moved to the door leading out of our room.
"Why are you being cautious?"
"Because there could be people on the other side of the door."
"That doesn't mean you have to be cautious, we'll just bust out and kill them dead."
"Done a lot of that Nidget? Just busting out of a door and killing people dead."
"Well I've heard thats how some people do it." I looked at him crossly and then the door opened and guns were shoved in our faces.
"Come quietly or die." I tell you its the worst part about arguing about going out of a door, someone else always ends the argument in a way you don't want it ended!
"Are we there already?" My mouth had a taste I'd rather not put to words, needless to say, it was nasty.
"No I heard someone say there is something on the tracks."
"Great now we'll be delayed." I went to go back to sleep when I heard the distinct sound of a weapon being fired.
"Was that a gunshot?" Nidget is hilarious in his naiveness.
"Either that or the oddest sounding fart I've ever heard." Nidget looked at me sour, and then fetched his crossbow from a nearby bag.
"You know they have pistols even for shorties."
"They aren't as reliable as my crossbow."
"Let me guess you fired a pistol once and it hurt your hand and so you'll never do it again."
"Won't even dignify that with a response." I chuckeled to myself and moved to the door leading out of our room.
"Why are you being cautious?"
"Because there could be people on the other side of the door."
"That doesn't mean you have to be cautious, we'll just bust out and kill them dead."
"Done a lot of that Nidget? Just busting out of a door and killing people dead."
"Well I've heard thats how some people do it." I looked at him crossly and then the door opened and guns were shoved in our faces.
"Come quietly or die." I tell you its the worst part about arguing about going out of a door, someone else always ends the argument in a way you don't want it ended!
Wednesday, August 29, 2012
Nidget Has a Plan, and a Job, but Mostly a Plan
"You're still reading the paper!" Nidget was outraged, it had been a day since he had left me in a huff for not lowering my paper and here he was all angry I was still reading it.
"Well its not the same one if thats what you're implying, you do know they print a new one each day right?" I didn't know if he knew that, Nidget is kind of an idiot.
"Well this is enough of this we have to do something." He said we like we were great buddies who do things all the time, we are not, we do not, and I have no idea where he gets the idea that I'm just waiting for him to rescue you from my boring drudgery. As I have said before I LIKE BORING DRUDGERY! Its what makes life worth living forever.
"Something being something you want to do." People always say they need my help, but what they normally need is a sucker to go along with a bad plan.
"Look I've already bought train tickets and so you are coming with me, get your stuff pack a bag and make sure to bring a revolver."
"Oh we're going on a train ride and I should bring a pistol? I'm sure this will end spectacularly." I have to admit I was partially intrigued, and not just because Nidget bought me a ticket somewhere.
"Pack fast the train leaves in an hour."
"Ok ok, warm climate cool climate?"
"Warm I think, I dunno have you ever been to Lork?" Lork the city of sin that had been exploded and put back together again (hey that rhymed kind of).
"Yeah a couple of times."
"Well than pack for that and get ready and stop making me late!" With that Nidget took off for the train station, and I was even more intrigued. I packed a simple bag and made sure to bring a revolver with some ammunition (I'd been to Lork enough to know I'd probably have to use it). I still worried about whatever idiocy I was getting myself into, but I'll admit boring drudgery can be well pretty boring. So I turned the sign on my store to say I'd be back sometime (I specifically made that sign for when I go off on a dumb adventure knowing I would eventually) and made my way to the train station. Train rides are always exciting in The Guard territory, you don't know if the tracks will go the whole way or you won't get robbed, its an adventure in an of itself!
"Well its not the same one if thats what you're implying, you do know they print a new one each day right?" I didn't know if he knew that, Nidget is kind of an idiot.
"Well this is enough of this we have to do something." He said we like we were great buddies who do things all the time, we are not, we do not, and I have no idea where he gets the idea that I'm just waiting for him to rescue you from my boring drudgery. As I have said before I LIKE BORING DRUDGERY! Its what makes life worth living forever.
"Something being something you want to do." People always say they need my help, but what they normally need is a sucker to go along with a bad plan.
"Look I've already bought train tickets and so you are coming with me, get your stuff pack a bag and make sure to bring a revolver."
"Oh we're going on a train ride and I should bring a pistol? I'm sure this will end spectacularly." I have to admit I was partially intrigued, and not just because Nidget bought me a ticket somewhere.
"Pack fast the train leaves in an hour."
"Ok ok, warm climate cool climate?"
"Warm I think, I dunno have you ever been to Lork?" Lork the city of sin that had been exploded and put back together again (hey that rhymed kind of).
"Yeah a couple of times."
"Well than pack for that and get ready and stop making me late!" With that Nidget took off for the train station, and I was even more intrigued. I packed a simple bag and made sure to bring a revolver with some ammunition (I'd been to Lork enough to know I'd probably have to use it). I still worried about whatever idiocy I was getting myself into, but I'll admit boring drudgery can be well pretty boring. So I turned the sign on my store to say I'd be back sometime (I specifically made that sign for when I go off on a dumb adventure knowing I would eventually) and made my way to the train station. Train rides are always exciting in The Guard territory, you don't know if the tracks will go the whole way or you won't get robbed, its an adventure in an of itself!
Tuesday, August 28, 2012
Why Can't You Get a Job?
"I'm bored Trezlan." Nidget was in my shop pacing around like he just got bad news, the pitter of his feet on the boards amused me in a way I really can't qualify.
"And yet you feel the need to bother me anyway." I was reading the paper, it was amazing how fast things had calmed down post war, and how quickly things like free press had become. Both Ronerawth and the Red Hand had never been one for letting papers just print whatever, but the Guard saw that differently and didn't feel the need to regulate what morons who print papers think. And so papers like the Rosettia Herald (Herald being that jerk who tells you things are coming, its very appropriate) was born.
"We should be doing something Trezlan, taking on the world finding our fortunes..."
"Getting a job that doesn't involve pestering me while I read the paper."
"You've grown complacent! Where's the desire to roam Trezlan? Where's the desire to fight the good fight?"
"Sleep on uncomfortable ground, risk my life for no reason, end up not playing a signifigant part in anything."
"Could you at least stop reading the paper and look at me." I could tell from his voice he thought it was insulting the way I was casually dismissing him, which is a big reason for me doing it. I kept on reading the paper and I heard him leave out the door. I'd have felt bad, but I really did not want to get involved with whatever he wanted me to get involved with, because thats not the kind of thing I did anymore. I was trying to make my life as a normal shop owner, no more crazy adventures, no more rushing off in the middle of the night to save the world. Of course that didn't actually happen, but for one whole year I was living the boring dream!
"And yet you feel the need to bother me anyway." I was reading the paper, it was amazing how fast things had calmed down post war, and how quickly things like free press had become. Both Ronerawth and the Red Hand had never been one for letting papers just print whatever, but the Guard saw that differently and didn't feel the need to regulate what morons who print papers think. And so papers like the Rosettia Herald (Herald being that jerk who tells you things are coming, its very appropriate) was born.
"We should be doing something Trezlan, taking on the world finding our fortunes..."
"Getting a job that doesn't involve pestering me while I read the paper."
"You've grown complacent! Where's the desire to roam Trezlan? Where's the desire to fight the good fight?"
"Sleep on uncomfortable ground, risk my life for no reason, end up not playing a signifigant part in anything."
"Could you at least stop reading the paper and look at me." I could tell from his voice he thought it was insulting the way I was casually dismissing him, which is a big reason for me doing it. I kept on reading the paper and I heard him leave out the door. I'd have felt bad, but I really did not want to get involved with whatever he wanted me to get involved with, because thats not the kind of thing I did anymore. I was trying to make my life as a normal shop owner, no more crazy adventures, no more rushing off in the middle of the night to save the world. Of course that didn't actually happen, but for one whole year I was living the boring dream!
Monday, August 27, 2012
Nidget is The Worst Story Teller Ever
If I had known the story of how they got me out of my nightmare was Nidget finding something in my pocket and Valrym smashing it, I would have just put that in a sentence and been done with it! But no I let an idiot have my journal and he wrote a really boring story that included such gems as "I ignored the problem." THANKS NIDGET YOU LITTLE JERK I HOPE YOU DIE OF A DISEASE THAT IS LIKE DYING OF BOREDOM!
So anyway I'm back to writing and that ridiculous red pen Nidget had has been destroyed. I wish I could regale you of a tale of a wicked awesome retribution story, but there wasn't one. Mainly because I didn't know who was messing with me, I remembered little of it, and the amulet that would have been a hint got destroyed by Valrym. So yeah I live now safe in the knowledge I could once again be trapped in a dream world and subject to the likes of Nidget to get help, which means I'd be pretty boned.
I can suspect that the person behind it was a servant of that evil dark thingy whatever the weird it was underneath Ronerawth's capitol because of its aversion to earth magic. But thats not 100% because Valrym tells me everything hates earth magic (which makes me wish I knew some, just you know out of annoyance, what? I'm petty). At least for me it hasn't come back. I would ask Toneron if he had some kind of ward or sigil to lend me, but he hasn't been around for a bit, dude just up and disappeared. The guns keep showing up, but the man? No where. Probably a good idea with the anti magical stance The Guard takes, whatever Toneron is probably would trip the wards The Guard has for early warning (oh yeah thats a thing now, which is funny because it takes someone magical to draw the wards, but there are plenty of us around to do it because honestly most magical people hate other magical people as well).
All in all things settled in, I got to open my store to a rousing mediocre success (enough customers to make money, not enough to stop you know selling things). And the gang of idiots I associate with drifted off to do whatever they do when they aren't pissing me off. That's how my life went for a year and then, well things got a little more exciting, kind of. Look this story will be better than Nidget's at least!
So anyway I'm back to writing and that ridiculous red pen Nidget had has been destroyed. I wish I could regale you of a tale of a wicked awesome retribution story, but there wasn't one. Mainly because I didn't know who was messing with me, I remembered little of it, and the amulet that would have been a hint got destroyed by Valrym. So yeah I live now safe in the knowledge I could once again be trapped in a dream world and subject to the likes of Nidget to get help, which means I'd be pretty boned.
I can suspect that the person behind it was a servant of that evil dark thingy whatever the weird it was underneath Ronerawth's capitol because of its aversion to earth magic. But thats not 100% because Valrym tells me everything hates earth magic (which makes me wish I knew some, just you know out of annoyance, what? I'm petty). At least for me it hasn't come back. I would ask Toneron if he had some kind of ward or sigil to lend me, but he hasn't been around for a bit, dude just up and disappeared. The guns keep showing up, but the man? No where. Probably a good idea with the anti magical stance The Guard takes, whatever Toneron is probably would trip the wards The Guard has for early warning (oh yeah thats a thing now, which is funny because it takes someone magical to draw the wards, but there are plenty of us around to do it because honestly most magical people hate other magical people as well).
All in all things settled in, I got to open my store to a rousing mediocre success (enough customers to make money, not enough to stop you know selling things). And the gang of idiots I associate with drifted off to do whatever they do when they aren't pissing me off. That's how my life went for a year and then, well things got a little more exciting, kind of. Look this story will be better than Nidget's at least!
Friday, August 24, 2012
Resolution?
I started going through Trezlan's pockets immediately upon returning to the world of the not crazy. Andre, Valrym, and Capt Therod were of course alarmed.
"Nidget do you really think now is an appropriate time to rob him?" Andre being the voice of reason as usual. I found what I was looking for, a gold medallion with the same symbol as the one I'd see the person in Trezlan's nightmare wearing.
"Valrym, smash this, burn it, destroy it somehow."
"Ok?" Valrym was confused but he took the symbol outside and smashed it. Trezlan awoke immediately.
"Trezlan!" I shouted and he slapped me very very hard.
"YOU LITTLE MIDGET BASTARD!" So now you know how we saved Trezlan, by looking his pocket for a trinket he was carrying that was secretly connecting him to an evil dream magician. I realize I could have made this story a lot shorter just now.
"Nidget do you really think now is an appropriate time to rob him?" Andre being the voice of reason as usual. I found what I was looking for, a gold medallion with the same symbol as the one I'd see the person in Trezlan's nightmare wearing.
"Valrym, smash this, burn it, destroy it somehow."
"Ok?" Valrym was confused but he took the symbol outside and smashed it. Trezlan awoke immediately.
"Trezlan!" I shouted and he slapped me very very hard.
"YOU LITTLE MIDGET BASTARD!" So now you know how we saved Trezlan, by looking his pocket for a trinket he was carrying that was secretly connecting him to an evil dream magician. I realize I could have made this story a lot shorter just now.
Thursday, August 23, 2012
He Probably Deserves This
Running in a dream is actually fairly easy, you don't expend any real effort and you can effectively do it for as long and as hard as you want (though there is the problem of sometimes because you are in a dream the ground can suddenly not be the ground anymore). It's also weird becuase you almost want to be tired from all the running, but you can't feel it. So its probably like Trezlan experiences everyday with being such an asshole and yet wanting people to feel sorry for things that happen to him. Anyway we outran the cave and then were in the middle of blackness, no corpses, no cave of the dead, just nothing. Trezlan despite being in a dream was breathing extremely heavy, I guess that's how crazy he had gotten.
"You're here to kill me now Nidget?"
"I'm here to save you Trezlan."
"Right I've finally gone crazy, I'm imagining a shorty who put me here in the first place is here to save me."
"Well you probably have gone crazy, but..." And then he was gone, like there one second gone the next, in his place was a weird shadow of a man with a large glowing necklace.
"Trezlan is mine you midget." I knew I'd found the person responsible for the dream, and by found I mean he just came right out to me.
"Look I'm not a fan of his either, but killing him in a dream? That's kind of low man."
"BE GONE PEST!" He waived a hand at me, but I stayed where I was. I couldn't see his face, again because he was in shadow, but I could tell he was a bit angry. "EARTH MAGIC?" His anger definatley came through in the scream and how the blackness suddenly became red. I was then tossed rudely from the nightmare (like I felt literally thrown out of the world and back into my own body) it was so jarring I fell off the table I'd been propped on.
"Well that sucked." And it did, it really really did.
"You're here to kill me now Nidget?"
"I'm here to save you Trezlan."
"Right I've finally gone crazy, I'm imagining a shorty who put me here in the first place is here to save me."
"Well you probably have gone crazy, but..." And then he was gone, like there one second gone the next, in his place was a weird shadow of a man with a large glowing necklace.
"Trezlan is mine you midget." I knew I'd found the person responsible for the dream, and by found I mean he just came right out to me.
"Look I'm not a fan of his either, but killing him in a dream? That's kind of low man."
"BE GONE PEST!" He waived a hand at me, but I stayed where I was. I couldn't see his face, again because he was in shadow, but I could tell he was a bit angry. "EARTH MAGIC?" His anger definatley came through in the scream and how the blackness suddenly became red. I was then tossed rudely from the nightmare (like I felt literally thrown out of the world and back into my own body) it was so jarring I fell off the table I'd been propped on.
"Well that sucked." And it did, it really really did.
Wednesday, August 22, 2012
Valrym's Gambit
"I can only send one of you in there, its not like this is a normal thing to do." Trezlan was lying on the top of the bar, no other customers were in the Tavern, though it was around noon, most people don't start drinking that early.
"Can I say that I'm the worst person for this job?" I didn't want to do what Valrym was suggesting because well I'm a coward, and the very idea of going into Trezlan's mind to free him from his problem was terrifying.
"I was about to suggest you do it since this is probably all your fault." Captain Therod promised Valrym she would not arrest him for illegal magic, it wasn't a great promise but it was better than anything else we had going for us.
"I too think you should do it Nidget, if anything you are a master of getting into places you should not be, think of this as the ultimate place you should not be." Andre is always super helpful, and by helpful I mean an absolute dick at the moment you need it least.
"Well its decided then."
"Wait no it wasn't, these two assholes threw me under the cart and now you say its decided?"
"Works for me." All of them in unison. I almost wanted to run away, but I figured they'd just catch me and tie me to a chair or something. I sighed heavily to show my displeasure and then allowed Valrym to start his weird brain magic, well I thought it would be a ritual, but one moment I was standing next to Trezlan and the next I was in what appeared to be a cave filled with dead bodies. I was still myself from a cursory glance (thank the gods for small favors) and I was armed though if that would help me remained to be seen.
"RRRRRRRRRRRUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!" Trezlan half naked and crazy eyed came sprinting by me, I was about to ask why he was running when I turned to face the direction he came from and saw a wall of bodies steadily advancing down the cave. I'd like to say this was the most disturbing thing I saw in Trezlan's mind, but alas, it was the start of the crazy, not the end of it.
"Can I say that I'm the worst person for this job?" I didn't want to do what Valrym was suggesting because well I'm a coward, and the very idea of going into Trezlan's mind to free him from his problem was terrifying.
"I was about to suggest you do it since this is probably all your fault." Captain Therod promised Valrym she would not arrest him for illegal magic, it wasn't a great promise but it was better than anything else we had going for us.
"I too think you should do it Nidget, if anything you are a master of getting into places you should not be, think of this as the ultimate place you should not be." Andre is always super helpful, and by helpful I mean an absolute dick at the moment you need it least.
"Well its decided then."
"Wait no it wasn't, these two assholes threw me under the cart and now you say its decided?"
"Works for me." All of them in unison. I almost wanted to run away, but I figured they'd just catch me and tie me to a chair or something. I sighed heavily to show my displeasure and then allowed Valrym to start his weird brain magic, well I thought it would be a ritual, but one moment I was standing next to Trezlan and the next I was in what appeared to be a cave filled with dead bodies. I was still myself from a cursory glance (thank the gods for small favors) and I was armed though if that would help me remained to be seen.
"RRRRRRRRRRRUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!" Trezlan half naked and crazy eyed came sprinting by me, I was about to ask why he was running when I turned to face the direction he came from and saw a wall of bodies steadily advancing down the cave. I'd like to say this was the most disturbing thing I saw in Trezlan's mind, but alas, it was the start of the crazy, not the end of it.
Tuesday, August 21, 2012
Captain Therod Suffers No Fools
"You're an idiot." This was Therod's polite first thought after we brought her to Trezlan. I tell you its almost like the spirit of Trezlan was with us.
"He's a useful idiot though you have to admit Captain." Andre is always talking up my strong points.
"No I don't have to talk up his strong points of which I'm sure there aren't any, did either of you two think maybe he's just poisoned?" Andre looked at me and I shrugged my shoulders, Captain Therod sighed. She also checked Trezlan's eyes, and then his pulse.
"This is how you found him."
"Sure we'll go with that." I wasn't exactly going to say I knocked him out to the Captain of the damned Guard!
"Well I can't do anything for him." That makes two failed attempts by someone who I thought could help! I tell you its like I should get a real healer or something instead of these pepople of authority.
"Do you know anyone who can?" Andre was a lot nicer about it.
"Only healers I know are out of town right now, though I have heard rumors that the guy who runs the Flagon Slayer is some kind of healer, and I think he knows Trezlan."
"Worth a shot!" Now of course I didn't know at the time that Valrym knew Trezlan in a way that no one likes knowing someone, but its not my fault Trezlan is just that awful to everyone! Andre snatched up Trezlan like a small child and Therod let us use her horse to get him to the Flagon Slayer, and that's where the next leg of our not helping but totally helping Trezlan story continues! I tell you Trezlan despite letting me write in his journal is getting all antsy about how long this story is going. Its not like he's a short story teller either!
"He's a useful idiot though you have to admit Captain." Andre is always talking up my strong points.
"No I don't have to talk up his strong points of which I'm sure there aren't any, did either of you two think maybe he's just poisoned?" Andre looked at me and I shrugged my shoulders, Captain Therod sighed. She also checked Trezlan's eyes, and then his pulse.
"This is how you found him."
"Sure we'll go with that." I wasn't exactly going to say I knocked him out to the Captain of the damned Guard!
"Well I can't do anything for him." That makes two failed attempts by someone who I thought could help! I tell you its like I should get a real healer or something instead of these pepople of authority.
"Do you know anyone who can?" Andre was a lot nicer about it.
"Only healers I know are out of town right now, though I have heard rumors that the guy who runs the Flagon Slayer is some kind of healer, and I think he knows Trezlan."
"Worth a shot!" Now of course I didn't know at the time that Valrym knew Trezlan in a way that no one likes knowing someone, but its not my fault Trezlan is just that awful to everyone! Andre snatched up Trezlan like a small child and Therod let us use her horse to get him to the Flagon Slayer, and that's where the next leg of our not helping but totally helping Trezlan story continues! I tell you Trezlan despite letting me write in his journal is getting all antsy about how long this story is going. Its not like he's a short story teller either!
Monday, August 20, 2012
Ok So Maybe It was Sort of My Fault
"How long has he been out?" Andre was with me, I had kind of hoped Trezlan would just snap out of it so I wouldn't have to admit to Andre what happened, not that he wasn't obligated to me or anything, but still sometimes you hope a situation fixes itself without your involvement.
"A day maybe?"
"A day maybe? You don't know?"
"Well I knocked him out yesterday, he hasn't recovered since then, so a day." Trezlan had a bit of drool puddling near his mouth, but outside of that no indication he was with us.
"You knocked him out?"
"He said he was having problem sleeping."
"So your solution was to knock him out?"
"You say that like its a bad thing." Andre shook his head, it was his normal dissapproving shake, I've grown used to him not agreeing with just about anything I do. Andre checked Trezlan out including lifting his eye lids back and we could see his eyes had rolled back so that just the whites were visible. Andre tried shouting at Trezlan and stabbing the palm of his hand with a small dagger, neither did anything.
"Well we have two scenarios here, either you have some unknown power to knock people out entirely, or Mr. Lorentino here is suffering through something completely unrelated to you."
"So it really isn't my fault."
"You still put him into the trance he can't get out of, you're still at fault."
"Well fix him."
"With what Nidget? I'm not a healer."
"You're a priest right? Bust out some of that Fire God mojo and fix him up."
"You're knowledge of my religion is insulting Nidget, I'd correct your ignorance but I know from previous attempts to do this to you you'll shrug it off." He was right I did.
"So what do we do?"
Andre sighed, "We contact Captain Therod, this is most likely a magical infection and Trezlan could just be the first one hit with it, she deserves to know."
"Oh great lets hope she doesn't throw us in jail."
"Oh you're so optimistic Nidget, I'd figure she'd execute us before tossing us in jail."
"I love your positive outlook on things Andre." But he was right we had no other plays, so we had to find Captain Therod and hope that she wasn't interested in executing her more extreme amounts of authority. Fortunately she was not, unfortunately... Well I'll get to that.
"A day maybe?"
"A day maybe? You don't know?"
"Well I knocked him out yesterday, he hasn't recovered since then, so a day." Trezlan had a bit of drool puddling near his mouth, but outside of that no indication he was with us.
"You knocked him out?"
"He said he was having problem sleeping."
"So your solution was to knock him out?"
"You say that like its a bad thing." Andre shook his head, it was his normal dissapproving shake, I've grown used to him not agreeing with just about anything I do. Andre checked Trezlan out including lifting his eye lids back and we could see his eyes had rolled back so that just the whites were visible. Andre tried shouting at Trezlan and stabbing the palm of his hand with a small dagger, neither did anything.
"Well we have two scenarios here, either you have some unknown power to knock people out entirely, or Mr. Lorentino here is suffering through something completely unrelated to you."
"So it really isn't my fault."
"You still put him into the trance he can't get out of, you're still at fault."
"Well fix him."
"With what Nidget? I'm not a healer."
"You're a priest right? Bust out some of that Fire God mojo and fix him up."
"You're knowledge of my religion is insulting Nidget, I'd correct your ignorance but I know from previous attempts to do this to you you'll shrug it off." He was right I did.
"So what do we do?"
Andre sighed, "We contact Captain Therod, this is most likely a magical infection and Trezlan could just be the first one hit with it, she deserves to know."
"Oh great lets hope she doesn't throw us in jail."
"Oh you're so optimistic Nidget, I'd figure she'd execute us before tossing us in jail."
"I love your positive outlook on things Andre." But he was right we had no other plays, so we had to find Captain Therod and hope that she wasn't interested in executing her more extreme amounts of authority. Fortunately she was not, unfortunately... Well I'll get to that.
Friday, August 17, 2012
Things that Are Not my Fault Even when They Are
It's weird writing an "official" entry for Trezlan's journal since I already included at least one story of my own against his knowledge, that I guess will become his knowledge now? Anyway, Trezlan has let me fill in this part of his personal history since he spent the week completely unconcious and claims not to remember anything (I say claims, because Trezlan is a damn liar). I mean sure I did knock him out, but I figured all he needed was a good day of sleep! I had no idea he'd be out for a week! I can't forsee these kind of struggles! Its really not my fault Trezlan is such a monster that whatever caught up with him in the dream land trapped him for days.
All of that aside, I can say it was kind of my fault that it took at least a day for anyone to know Trezlan was in trouble because I kind of knocked him out, locked the door and hoped for the best. Look mistakes were made and again if Trezlan wasn't so horrible this wouldn't have happened in the first place! So officially our efforts to help Trezlan didn't really start till after a day of him being in a nightmarish hellscape, honestly it was probably something he deserved more than he would admit too!
Tomorrow I'll go over our attempts to wake him from the issue. Notice I said attempts, it wasn't exactly easy cracking into someone elses dreams when your friends aren't magic users at all!
All of that aside, I can say it was kind of my fault that it took at least a day for anyone to know Trezlan was in trouble because I kind of knocked him out, locked the door and hoped for the best. Look mistakes were made and again if Trezlan wasn't so horrible this wouldn't have happened in the first place! So officially our efforts to help Trezlan didn't really start till after a day of him being in a nightmarish hellscape, honestly it was probably something he deserved more than he would admit too!
Tomorrow I'll go over our attempts to wake him from the issue. Notice I said attempts, it wasn't exactly easy cracking into someone elses dreams when your friends aren't magic users at all!
Thursday, August 16, 2012
Things That Do Not Help
Nightmares or any dream for that matter are a really bad place to get stuck. I mean trapped in your own mental hellscape is a bad place anyway (as I've written of previously), but getting stuck in a dream is a lot worse. Why you may ask? Because dreams by their nature are not really controlled by you, they are dictated by that crazy place of your head that thinks that spiders coming out of your genitals is a great time to be had by all.
So getting stuck in a dream that not only was I not in control of, but could not get out of was really the worst of all worlds. And this time it totally was Nidget's fault (note from this time further any suggestion by him about curing ailments were never trusted). I do have to say this, due to the nature of how utterly terrifying the dream I was stuck in was, I remember little of it! Yeah it was one of those situations, I do know I was out for a very long time, and my small circle of enemies who claim to be my friends got together to try and help me. Tomorrow I'll include Nidget's tale on how they "cured" me of my issue that he totally did to me!
So getting stuck in a dream that not only was I not in control of, but could not get out of was really the worst of all worlds. And this time it totally was Nidget's fault (note from this time further any suggestion by him about curing ailments were never trusted). I do have to say this, due to the nature of how utterly terrifying the dream I was stuck in was, I remember little of it! Yeah it was one of those situations, I do know I was out for a very long time, and my small circle of enemies who claim to be my friends got together to try and help me. Tomorrow I'll include Nidget's tale on how they "cured" me of my issue that he totally did to me!
Wednesday, August 15, 2012
Times Dragging me Down
"Four days so far."
"You look it."
"Thank Nidget, I'd blame you for this but sadly this started before you bugging me, just barely, but still you're off the hook, for now." I was stocking shelves with odd trinkets I'd be putting up for sale (basically it was junk I'd collected long ago and was just now putting up for sale hoping to catch an idiot like myself). The firearm part of my store was already fully stocked and had been when I got back from my Shamanar adventure, there was a small note from Toneron about bare shelves selling nothing next to the guns.
"So they are just bad dreams?" Nidget was standing on my counter, I'd have yelled at him for doing it, but I was so out of it from lack of sleep that I couldn't even muster enough to care, in fact I'd been stocking the same shelf for about ten minutes.
"No they are horrible nightmares that I don't know if I'm currently still in when I wake up, so I stopped going to sleep, I think, this could also be a nightmare as your presence shows." Andre wasn't around it was morning prayers for the Followers which always left Nidget to come bug me, prayers in this case meant beating the crap out of each other, morning was just when it started.
"You know Trezlan I could probably help you here?"
"Oh you have some ancient shorty secret for ridding yourself of a a powerful magic user influencing my dreams in an effort to drive me mad or kill me?"
"Yep."
"Well it can't hurt, go ahead." This is one of those statements you regreat immediately after saying them. In this case I walked over to Nidget and he hit me on the head so hard it knocked me out (hilt of his sword if you wanted to know, I mean its not like his tiny fists could do the job). The worst part, other than of course being attacked when you did not expect it, IT DIDN'T STOP THE DAMN NIGHTMARES!
"You look it."
"Thank Nidget, I'd blame you for this but sadly this started before you bugging me, just barely, but still you're off the hook, for now." I was stocking shelves with odd trinkets I'd be putting up for sale (basically it was junk I'd collected long ago and was just now putting up for sale hoping to catch an idiot like myself). The firearm part of my store was already fully stocked and had been when I got back from my Shamanar adventure, there was a small note from Toneron about bare shelves selling nothing next to the guns.
"So they are just bad dreams?" Nidget was standing on my counter, I'd have yelled at him for doing it, but I was so out of it from lack of sleep that I couldn't even muster enough to care, in fact I'd been stocking the same shelf for about ten minutes.
"No they are horrible nightmares that I don't know if I'm currently still in when I wake up, so I stopped going to sleep, I think, this could also be a nightmare as your presence shows." Andre wasn't around it was morning prayers for the Followers which always left Nidget to come bug me, prayers in this case meant beating the crap out of each other, morning was just when it started.
"You know Trezlan I could probably help you here?"
"Oh you have some ancient shorty secret for ridding yourself of a a powerful magic user influencing my dreams in an effort to drive me mad or kill me?"
"Yep."
"Well it can't hurt, go ahead." This is one of those statements you regreat immediately after saying them. In this case I walked over to Nidget and he hit me on the head so hard it knocked me out (hilt of his sword if you wanted to know, I mean its not like his tiny fists could do the job). The worst part, other than of course being attacked when you did not expect it, IT DIDN'T STOP THE DAMN NIGHTMARES!
Tuesday, August 14, 2012
Post Shamanar World
"So Shamanar?"
"Was just and old mind controlling magic user of some kind, probably at one point he had a cult and wanted to have another one, he used Nidget to get me and then once he dominated me he would probably then go about getting other followers."
"And Nidget's blue skin?"
"Probably something he ate while mentally influenced, though I don't know of anything that turns your skin blue, clearly it was temporary as he's back to normal now."
"What about the book that started all of this?"
"An old rotten journal from what I can tell, I don't even know if Nidget really went and got it, or if Shamanar had just wanted to test if he had mind controlled Nidget, either way I did not touch it per a friend's suggestion, who knows what was really in it."
"Another beer?"
"Naturally." I was in Valrym's tavern, which had moved from being on the outskirts of town to being pretty much in a large block (still it was its own building amongst a couple four story buildings). Despite him not really being a huge fan of my previous works we had patched things up, and by patched things up I mean I got pretty drunk and just told him about what had gone on with my life. I think he was more trapped listening to me rather than wanting to, but such is the problem of being a businessman (I have the same issue when I'm tailoring suits for people, they yammer on and on like I care).
"What I don't get, well several things, but the most prominent is what about the dreams? Why did he dream that he was going to die?" At least Valrym was engaging me, he could hvae just listened and then wandered off like I do, look I'll admit I'm terrible at paying attention.
"Nidget's a bad guy, probably has bad dreams because he's a bad guy. I can't tell you how many dreams I have where people threaten to kill me in really creepy detail." Yes these dreams were new, yes I was trying to write them off as bad dreams, no it wasn't working.
"Well you do have the stench of death on you Trezlan, though its stronger than it was before, new cologne?" There was the old Valrym I knew and disliked.
"I'm just glad you noticed." That was the end of our conversation. I continued drinking, Valrym moved on to the no other customers in his tavern at six in the morning. I tell you I don't think people are as dedicated as I am to drinking properly!
"Was just and old mind controlling magic user of some kind, probably at one point he had a cult and wanted to have another one, he used Nidget to get me and then once he dominated me he would probably then go about getting other followers."
"And Nidget's blue skin?"
"Probably something he ate while mentally influenced, though I don't know of anything that turns your skin blue, clearly it was temporary as he's back to normal now."
"What about the book that started all of this?"
"An old rotten journal from what I can tell, I don't even know if Nidget really went and got it, or if Shamanar had just wanted to test if he had mind controlled Nidget, either way I did not touch it per a friend's suggestion, who knows what was really in it."
"Another beer?"
"Naturally." I was in Valrym's tavern, which had moved from being on the outskirts of town to being pretty much in a large block (still it was its own building amongst a couple four story buildings). Despite him not really being a huge fan of my previous works we had patched things up, and by patched things up I mean I got pretty drunk and just told him about what had gone on with my life. I think he was more trapped listening to me rather than wanting to, but such is the problem of being a businessman (I have the same issue when I'm tailoring suits for people, they yammer on and on like I care).
"What I don't get, well several things, but the most prominent is what about the dreams? Why did he dream that he was going to die?" At least Valrym was engaging me, he could hvae just listened and then wandered off like I do, look I'll admit I'm terrible at paying attention.
"Nidget's a bad guy, probably has bad dreams because he's a bad guy. I can't tell you how many dreams I have where people threaten to kill me in really creepy detail." Yes these dreams were new, yes I was trying to write them off as bad dreams, no it wasn't working.
"Well you do have the stench of death on you Trezlan, though its stronger than it was before, new cologne?" There was the old Valrym I knew and disliked.
"I'm just glad you noticed." That was the end of our conversation. I continued drinking, Valrym moved on to the no other customers in his tavern at six in the morning. I tell you I don't think people are as dedicated as I am to drinking properly!
Monday, August 13, 2012
Shamajerk
"Oooffff." That was the sound of my back slamming into stone, well that was the sound I made when I hit the stone, the actual sound was more thudcrack, but you know semantics. Shamanar was pretty powerful as far as magic users go, or he felt powerful (as in I was being thrown around the room pretty easily). His physical body was that of an incredibly muscled man, face was chiseled handsome... no I'm not making that up, guy looked like the kind of person you lose a girlfriend too. He was shirtless with tight what appeared to be silk pants on. Of all the magic users who have kicked my ass (and the list is in fact growing) he was the weirdest.
"Will you submit to Shamanar?" His voice was still deafening, and it seemed to be coming from everywhere.
"If I could reach my nuts I'd tell you to..." And then I was tossed through the door leading to the "well" room. I was back in the suicide room, the ghosts that had chased me in there weren't there anymore. Shamanar slowly approached me, despite being really muscular he moved extremely slow. This gave me an opportunity to draw my revolver and fire some shots at him, of course they did nothing and just caused him to laugh.
"This? This is the best you can do to the great Shamanar?" I tried to run but he was next to me an instant.
"SUBMIT!!!" He had hauled me off the ground and I was up in the air, but something curious was going on. I wasn't in pain? It was something I'd noticed earlier, despite being tossed around the well room I wasn't actually hurt, like I felt nothing broken, bruised, or bleeding. So despite beating me up I wasn't actually hurt. Which is either a testament to how awesome I am (so awesome) or I wasn't actually where I thought I was doing what I thought I was doing.
I drew my sword out, "That will not harm me little one." I smiled at Shamanar and plunged it through myself, nothing. No pain, no blood, and no injury, for a brief moment in front of me the image flickered. Suddenly I was on the ground, the handsome image of Shamanar was gone, and I was back in the same room I came into, though it was a lot more decrepit looking. The stair cases were broken down, the walls had more holes than one of my stories, and the floors were rotten. The door that had trapped me was off its hinges and hand lazily in the wind.
In front of me was the real Shamanar, an old frail looking man in dirty rags clutching a rotted old memoire. None of it had been true. Shamanar looked up at me with anger, he could see I had bested him at his own game (see being crazy in the past helps me avoid crazy in the future... yes it makes sense). I didn't say anything to him, there was nothing more to be said, I made a deliberate motion to pull my revolver out, took aim, and blew his head off. The frail body hit the floor with a thump, the rest of his head landed with a splat.
Mind magic is always dangerous, because you don't know what you might be doing while you are doing what you think you are doing (yes that makes sense). For whatever I might have learned from that husk say by sucking his body dry with necromancy, I'd be risking my own sanity taking that weirdness within (and I do that enough thank you). I burned his body, and left enough fire to destroy the rest of his house. I figured there hadn't actually been any cultists in a long time, this was the last desperate act of a crazed old man (hence the desire for me to submit).
I found my horse pretty much where I'd left him, happily munching on some grass, from the grass he'd eaten I noticed I hadn't been gone long. I was happy the situation was over, but kind of miffed Nidget had been so grossly incompetent (that was the first time, sadly its not been the last). At least this time I didn't end up too hurt, just my brain felt broken, but I had a ride back to fix that, well as much as I ever "fix" my head. Anyway, I'd like to say I returned and things were aok, but no no they just got stupider.
"Will you submit to Shamanar?" His voice was still deafening, and it seemed to be coming from everywhere.
"If I could reach my nuts I'd tell you to..." And then I was tossed through the door leading to the "well" room. I was back in the suicide room, the ghosts that had chased me in there weren't there anymore. Shamanar slowly approached me, despite being really muscular he moved extremely slow. This gave me an opportunity to draw my revolver and fire some shots at him, of course they did nothing and just caused him to laugh.
"This? This is the best you can do to the great Shamanar?" I tried to run but he was next to me an instant.
"SUBMIT!!!" He had hauled me off the ground and I was up in the air, but something curious was going on. I wasn't in pain? It was something I'd noticed earlier, despite being tossed around the well room I wasn't actually hurt, like I felt nothing broken, bruised, or bleeding. So despite beating me up I wasn't actually hurt. Which is either a testament to how awesome I am (so awesome) or I wasn't actually where I thought I was doing what I thought I was doing.
I drew my sword out, "That will not harm me little one." I smiled at Shamanar and plunged it through myself, nothing. No pain, no blood, and no injury, for a brief moment in front of me the image flickered. Suddenly I was on the ground, the handsome image of Shamanar was gone, and I was back in the same room I came into, though it was a lot more decrepit looking. The stair cases were broken down, the walls had more holes than one of my stories, and the floors were rotten. The door that had trapped me was off its hinges and hand lazily in the wind.
In front of me was the real Shamanar, an old frail looking man in dirty rags clutching a rotted old memoire. None of it had been true. Shamanar looked up at me with anger, he could see I had bested him at his own game (see being crazy in the past helps me avoid crazy in the future... yes it makes sense). I didn't say anything to him, there was nothing more to be said, I made a deliberate motion to pull my revolver out, took aim, and blew his head off. The frail body hit the floor with a thump, the rest of his head landed with a splat.
Mind magic is always dangerous, because you don't know what you might be doing while you are doing what you think you are doing (yes that makes sense). For whatever I might have learned from that husk say by sucking his body dry with necromancy, I'd be risking my own sanity taking that weirdness within (and I do that enough thank you). I burned his body, and left enough fire to destroy the rest of his house. I figured there hadn't actually been any cultists in a long time, this was the last desperate act of a crazed old man (hence the desire for me to submit).
I found my horse pretty much where I'd left him, happily munching on some grass, from the grass he'd eaten I noticed I hadn't been gone long. I was happy the situation was over, but kind of miffed Nidget had been so grossly incompetent (that was the first time, sadly its not been the last). At least this time I didn't end up too hurt, just my brain felt broken, but I had a ride back to fix that, well as much as I ever "fix" my head. Anyway, I'd like to say I returned and things were aok, but no no they just got stupider.
Friday, August 10, 2012
Damned Undead of the Damned
The undead are always an ugly enemy to fight. They are by their very nature trapped people in a state of neither live nor dead (hence undead), so in a way you feel pitty for them. Well you would feel pity for them IF THEY WEREN'T CONSANTLY TRYING TO EAT YOU! Which is also weird, undead people are animated by magic, they do not need food, why do they try and eat people? This is madness.
Ok all of that out of the way, these undead were the normal type, gaunt, clothing all torn to shreds (why? I mean if they were a cult why didn't they die fully clothed? THIS MAKES NO SENSE!). I wasn't that worried because you know fire, I long to burn things. I long to burn things that can't be burned (more on this later). So of course I turned to the rushing enemies and unleashed a cone of fire to absolutely no success. Because they weren't regular undead, no no they were damn ghosts! GHOSTS! The worst of all spectral creatures BECAUSE THEY DO NOT BURN! They are on the list of things I want to burn though. The list as of right now.
Ghosts
Nidget
The sky (wait let me cross that one off, I did burn the sky)
Nidget
Water
That's all I can think of right now. Anyway, my attempt to burn my spectral pursuers failed, I did what any man would do faced with a charging surge of ghosts. I ran! Which is not so smart when you are stuck in a cultists fortress and being chased by ghosts (who can go through walls). But beggars can not be choosers when running from the damned. I decided to go lower intead of upper (less of a chance of falling from up high due to bad floor boards, notice I said less, not nill). Thankfully for me ghosts spectral nature works to your advantage when pushing past them (because unless they are concentrating they can not harm you, well normally, there are other nevermind nevermind).
The room beyond the stair room was nothing but beds and corpses (probably of the ghost people who were chasing me). Near each bed was a bowl of something, probably what they drank to die. Look I wasn't thinking very much I was running, beyond the room with beds was a hallway that lead to what looked like a circular well room, I figured I could jump in there, leap down the well snag the rope and make it to cavern below hopefully an outlet to somewhere else and escape (this plan was predicated on failure in like three places). No sooner had I hit the "well" room than the door behind me slammed shut, and I saw that it wasn't a well at all, but a dias with that stupid book on it. Materializing in front of me was Shamanar, naturally, the ghosts had directly chased me into the gods/man/annoyance's lair.
"WELCOME TO YOUR DOOM!" It pronounced with a booming voice.
"You said that already."
"Seriously this is how this going to go? Seriously?"
Seriously journal thats how this will go.
Ok all of that out of the way, these undead were the normal type, gaunt, clothing all torn to shreds (why? I mean if they were a cult why didn't they die fully clothed? THIS MAKES NO SENSE!). I wasn't that worried because you know fire, I long to burn things. I long to burn things that can't be burned (more on this later). So of course I turned to the rushing enemies and unleashed a cone of fire to absolutely no success. Because they weren't regular undead, no no they were damn ghosts! GHOSTS! The worst of all spectral creatures BECAUSE THEY DO NOT BURN! They are on the list of things I want to burn though. The list as of right now.
Ghosts
Nidget
Nidget
Water
That's all I can think of right now. Anyway, my attempt to burn my spectral pursuers failed, I did what any man would do faced with a charging surge of ghosts. I ran! Which is not so smart when you are stuck in a cultists fortress and being chased by ghosts (who can go through walls). But beggars can not be choosers when running from the damned. I decided to go lower intead of upper (less of a chance of falling from up high due to bad floor boards, notice I said less, not nill). Thankfully for me ghosts spectral nature works to your advantage when pushing past them (because unless they are concentrating they can not harm you, well normally, there are other nevermind nevermind).
The room beyond the stair room was nothing but beds and corpses (probably of the ghost people who were chasing me). Near each bed was a bowl of something, probably what they drank to die. Look I wasn't thinking very much I was running, beyond the room with beds was a hallway that lead to what looked like a circular well room, I figured I could jump in there, leap down the well snag the rope and make it to cavern below hopefully an outlet to somewhere else and escape (this plan was predicated on failure in like three places). No sooner had I hit the "well" room than the door behind me slammed shut, and I saw that it wasn't a well at all, but a dias with that stupid book on it. Materializing in front of me was Shamanar, naturally, the ghosts had directly chased me into the gods/man/annoyance's lair.
"WELCOME TO YOUR DOOM!" It pronounced with a booming voice.
"You said that already."
"Seriously this is how this going to go? Seriously?"
Seriously journal thats how this will go.
Thursday, August 9, 2012
Shamanahahahahahaha
"Look I'm just here to get my property then I'll be out of your hair." Yes this was the lie I was going to go with, the old "I already own the thing you have stolen" Its not exactly the smartest move, I mean they stole it anyway, so its not like they care too much about having stolen property, but it can get you in the door and that lets you kill whoever has your property. In this case I was already in the door and trapped inside, but look once you have a plan you tend to go all in, or I do anyway.
"You are now our property." I was in what had formerly been a sitting room, a couple winding stair cases lead to an upper floor area and doors beyond it, down below were also doors that probably lead to either a dining room or I some kind of cultist orgy room (yes those were the only two options).
"I'd like to see the slip on that, I'm pretty sure slavery is now illegal in these lands AND I'm also pretty sure I did not sell myself accidentally." Pretty sure, I mean I'd signed a lot of random things since becoming a citizen, so I wasn't entirely sure.
"Silence fool, you now belong to Shamanar."
"The god Shamanar?"
"No god, just Shamanar."
"So like Shamanar is not a god, just Shamanar? That doesn't make any sense." The voice waited, I was still standing near the door, but I was entirely confused here. I mean I was under the impression he was a god, but now he was just saying his name. That made no sense.
"You are a petulant child." Hilariously the voice had turned from being booming and threatning to kind of petty and insulting.
"Look we were talking right lets keep talking." At this point I was also trying to see if there was a simple way through the door. It was metal, but I could have just burned down the wall next to it, which was not metal, but could have been pretty thick, which made the burning not reliable enough for me to use it (because the last time I did something like that was when I was completely ball insane, and while I'm not normally "sane" I like to think of self preservation). Also I had to get that stupid book.
"DIE!!!" The voice returned to its anger and with it came a horde of the undead (naturally). They poured forth from above and below.
"Well this is not a very good negotiating tactic at all." And it totally was not.
"You are now our property." I was in what had formerly been a sitting room, a couple winding stair cases lead to an upper floor area and doors beyond it, down below were also doors that probably lead to either a dining room or I some kind of cultist orgy room (yes those were the only two options).
"I'd like to see the slip on that, I'm pretty sure slavery is now illegal in these lands AND I'm also pretty sure I did not sell myself accidentally." Pretty sure, I mean I'd signed a lot of random things since becoming a citizen, so I wasn't entirely sure.
"Silence fool, you now belong to Shamanar."
"The god Shamanar?"
"No god, just Shamanar."
"So like Shamanar is not a god, just Shamanar? That doesn't make any sense." The voice waited, I was still standing near the door, but I was entirely confused here. I mean I was under the impression he was a god, but now he was just saying his name. That made no sense.
"You are a petulant child." Hilariously the voice had turned from being booming and threatning to kind of petty and insulting.
"Look we were talking right lets keep talking." At this point I was also trying to see if there was a simple way through the door. It was metal, but I could have just burned down the wall next to it, which was not metal, but could have been pretty thick, which made the burning not reliable enough for me to use it (because the last time I did something like that was when I was completely ball insane, and while I'm not normally "sane" I like to think of self preservation). Also I had to get that stupid book.
"DIE!!!" The voice returned to its anger and with it came a horde of the undead (naturally). They poured forth from above and below.
"Well this is not a very good negotiating tactic at all." And it totally was not.
Wednesday, August 8, 2012
On Animals and The Traps we Spring
"So do you have any tips here?" We were outside of the path that lead up to the fortress of the Cult of Shamanar (well I thought thats what they were called, its not like there was a sign out front). When I turned to Toneron he was already riding off, which was a step up from his normal just dissappearing.
"DON'T TOUCH THE BOOK OH AND DON'T DIE!" He shouted over his shoulder alerting everyone who didn't already know I was there to my prescense (with friends like these!). I dismounted from my horse and left it to munch grass in the plain leading up to the mountain hideaway of the cultists (I prefer cultists who are just out in the open of a huge field, much easier to just murder... err talk to). Making my way up the path I had images of rifleman shooting the crap out of me from hidden positions, but no one was there. There wasn't any recent foot traffic (it had been a dry week so dust was all over the mountain path an no footprints, hoof tracks, or cart lines) either, which is a little alarming. I mean even if you are a cult you have still have to eat (well in theory unless you're a cannibal cult, but even then you'd run out of followers and have to find more eventually).
The front door of the fortress was wide open. It was a large double door set up with a huge latch on the outside (which seemed odd, almost like it was designed to keep people in instead of keeping others out, this as they say is foreshadowing). Again no one was around, I saw no footprints leading inside, and like any animal about to get caught in a trap I walked in with absolutely no caution. So no sooner was I inside than the doors slammed behind me and the latch ratched close.
"Welcome to your doom!" The Voice overhead boomed and I cursed my luck. I mean I swear I scheduled my doom for next week!
"DON'T TOUCH THE BOOK OH AND DON'T DIE!" He shouted over his shoulder alerting everyone who didn't already know I was there to my prescense (with friends like these!). I dismounted from my horse and left it to munch grass in the plain leading up to the mountain hideaway of the cultists (I prefer cultists who are just out in the open of a huge field, much easier to just murder... err talk to). Making my way up the path I had images of rifleman shooting the crap out of me from hidden positions, but no one was there. There wasn't any recent foot traffic (it had been a dry week so dust was all over the mountain path an no footprints, hoof tracks, or cart lines) either, which is a little alarming. I mean even if you are a cult you have still have to eat (well in theory unless you're a cannibal cult, but even then you'd run out of followers and have to find more eventually).
The front door of the fortress was wide open. It was a large double door set up with a huge latch on the outside (which seemed odd, almost like it was designed to keep people in instead of keeping others out, this as they say is foreshadowing). Again no one was around, I saw no footprints leading inside, and like any animal about to get caught in a trap I walked in with absolutely no caution. So no sooner was I inside than the doors slammed behind me and the latch ratched close.
"Welcome to your doom!" The Voice overhead boomed and I cursed my luck. I mean I swear I scheduled my doom for next week!
Tuesday, August 7, 2012
Gods Got a Lot of Names
"I was wondering when you'd show up." I had been riding on my horse for a couple hours, passed a lot of traffic going back to Rosetia, didn't see a lot going in the direction I was going in, but it wasn't like I was heading to a trade destination (cults don't have the best trade opportunities, unless you count being alive and then being dead as a commodity).
"I've been busy, its not easy being kicked out of a country as I'm sure you know all too well Trezlan." Toneron was on a horse of his own, probably to keep pace with me though I doubted he needed it.
"Thanks to you."
"Well you're welcome. Ronerawth was strangling you anyway, you didn't realize it, but you had gotten soft, you need excitement." I rolled my eyes, but I don't think he noticed it.
"So you know anything of Shamanar?" I figured whatever Toneron was he might know if this god I'd never heard of.
"Nope not a thing, and I'd been racking my brain ever since Nidget had told me about his problem."
"How long did it take you?"
"About three minutes." To stop laughing at Nidget being blue is the subtext you are probably missing out on here.
"Do you think getting the book back and take the curse off?" We passed a young couple going in the other direction they had a small child who had a hacking cough that was loud enough for me to wince. Toneron looked a little too long for my taste at the family, I noted that maybe he was a carrier of disease.
"Couldn't hurt, I mean its the most likely reason Nidget got cursed, now whether putting it back takes the curse off? I don't know, could just be a curse for disturbing the book, which is why the Cult paid him do it instead of doing it themselves. A bit sad they didn't just sacrifice one of their members though, I tell you cults today no sense of self sacrifice." He chuckled a bit at the end there, I kind of got he was saying they used to kill cult members for belief, but again, its kind of creepy.
"Still strange I don't know who Shamanar is."
"Gods have a lot of names Trezlan." He smiled again, maybe he's a god too? A god of disease? MAYBE?
"This has been enlightening as usual Toneron."
"You know Trezlan I'd be more enlightening if you knew more, since I am a figment of your imagination." I stopped dead, was I that crazy? Had I made up Toneron?
"That's not possible." I was saying it out loud if only to make it seem less possible, if that makes any sense.
"You're right its not, and if I was an asshole I would have just dissappeared after I had said it, but you should have seen your face!" I was relieved, if only partially worried, maybe my crazy was just taking a moment to make me think Toneron was real? I'm still not a hundred percent convinced.
"At least my life isn't boring." And it continues not to be boring, although I could do with less possible hallucination/god/disease vectors like Toneron not showing up. It was pleasant he rode with me all the way to the cultists, I think out of some kind of morbid curiosity, to tell you the truth that's also why I was there. I still wanted to know what kind of God was Shamanar!
"I've been busy, its not easy being kicked out of a country as I'm sure you know all too well Trezlan." Toneron was on a horse of his own, probably to keep pace with me though I doubted he needed it.
"Thanks to you."
"Well you're welcome. Ronerawth was strangling you anyway, you didn't realize it, but you had gotten soft, you need excitement." I rolled my eyes, but I don't think he noticed it.
"So you know anything of Shamanar?" I figured whatever Toneron was he might know if this god I'd never heard of.
"Nope not a thing, and I'd been racking my brain ever since Nidget had told me about his problem."
"How long did it take you?"
"About three minutes." To stop laughing at Nidget being blue is the subtext you are probably missing out on here.
"Do you think getting the book back and take the curse off?" We passed a young couple going in the other direction they had a small child who had a hacking cough that was loud enough for me to wince. Toneron looked a little too long for my taste at the family, I noted that maybe he was a carrier of disease.
"Couldn't hurt, I mean its the most likely reason Nidget got cursed, now whether putting it back takes the curse off? I don't know, could just be a curse for disturbing the book, which is why the Cult paid him do it instead of doing it themselves. A bit sad they didn't just sacrifice one of their members though, I tell you cults today no sense of self sacrifice." He chuckled a bit at the end there, I kind of got he was saying they used to kill cult members for belief, but again, its kind of creepy.
"Still strange I don't know who Shamanar is."
"Gods have a lot of names Trezlan." He smiled again, maybe he's a god too? A god of disease? MAYBE?
"This has been enlightening as usual Toneron."
"You know Trezlan I'd be more enlightening if you knew more, since I am a figment of your imagination." I stopped dead, was I that crazy? Had I made up Toneron?
"That's not possible." I was saying it out loud if only to make it seem less possible, if that makes any sense.
"You're right its not, and if I was an asshole I would have just dissappeared after I had said it, but you should have seen your face!" I was relieved, if only partially worried, maybe my crazy was just taking a moment to make me think Toneron was real? I'm still not a hundred percent convinced.
"At least my life isn't boring." And it continues not to be boring, although I could do with less possible hallucination/god/disease vectors like Toneron not showing up. It was pleasant he rode with me all the way to the cultists, I think out of some kind of morbid curiosity, to tell you the truth that's also why I was there. I still wanted to know what kind of God was Shamanar!
Monday, August 6, 2012
Seen One Cult of Crazy God Worshippers
"You are not coming with me." I had my horse loaded up with supplies (I had one horse now, having sold the other one upon arriving at Rosetia, I did not plan on moving again anytime soon, and still have not). Supplies in this case meant bullets, explosives, and a couple magical items I would be happier if the Guard did not know I had in my possession.
"I can help you!" He was causing a bit of a stir amongst the early morning trade caravaner and ruffians looking for a few spots of coin. People with blue skin tend to attract attention it appeared.
"Like you helped yourself into this situation? No you'd slow me down, and you'd also show the cult exactly why I'm there."
"You don't know how to deal with these people!"
"Nidget I've been around I've dealt with cultists, I'll just calmly reason with them that the book is cursed and that I have to do the right thing."
"I'm a dead man." Nidget started wandering off. I of course didn't mention once the calm reasoning was over I'd just kill them all horrifically and take the book from their dead hands, I didn't mention it because I was on the damn street and I'm not an idiot (well completely an idiot I was helping Nidget here).
"Watch my store I'll be back soonish, well maybe soon, but if not later than I'll be back when I am. Look just make sure my store doesn't burn down, ALSO TRY NOT TO DIE!" I rode off into the morning sun and I think Nidget flipped me off. As is normal for me I had no plan, no way of actually accomplishing my goal, and no idea how bad this cult was. That's a lot of No's without a lot of knows, no?
"I can help you!" He was causing a bit of a stir amongst the early morning trade caravaner and ruffians looking for a few spots of coin. People with blue skin tend to attract attention it appeared.
"Like you helped yourself into this situation? No you'd slow me down, and you'd also show the cult exactly why I'm there."
"You don't know how to deal with these people!"
"Nidget I've been around I've dealt with cultists, I'll just calmly reason with them that the book is cursed and that I have to do the right thing."
"I'm a dead man." Nidget started wandering off. I of course didn't mention once the calm reasoning was over I'd just kill them all horrifically and take the book from their dead hands, I didn't mention it because I was on the damn street and I'm not an idiot (well completely an idiot I was helping Nidget here).
"Watch my store I'll be back soonish, well maybe soon, but if not later than I'll be back when I am. Look just make sure my store doesn't burn down, ALSO TRY NOT TO DIE!" I rode off into the morning sun and I think Nidget flipped me off. As is normal for me I had no plan, no way of actually accomplishing my goal, and no idea how bad this cult was. That's a lot of No's without a lot of knows, no?
Friday, August 3, 2012
The Curse of Shamanar
"So you stole something and you got cursed that sound about right?" I had lit a lamp and after stifling all the chuckles at Nidgets blue appearence finally got around to him telling me how I can resolve his issue.
"It was more complicated than that Trezlan." Nidget was sitting on the ground (I had no chairs, or furniture, its always the simple things you forget when starting over), he seemed moderately annoyed at me guessing at what had happened.
"All right enlighten me."
"Ok so I was took on a job to aquire an object."
"Steal."
"Aquire," He made sure to highlight aquire, again he was stealing it, "The object was a holy book to a god named Shamanar..."
"Wait Shamanar? I've litterally never heard of this god." And here I thought I knew everything, well I tell people I know everything, same thing really.
"You are just going to interupt me this whole time aren't you?"
"Yes."
"So anyway this book, was apparently though lost during the war, but I found it fairly easily, it was at monastery on the coast. I thought maybe the monks had been killed or something, because it appeared empty when I got inside and the book was just waiting on a pedestal."
"And that didn't cause you to worry at all that the book was just sitting out in the open like that and no one else had ever taken it?"
"Nope."
"Gods you're an idiot, continue."
"So I grabbed the book, see it wasn't even stealing it was just out in the open! And gave it to the guy who wanted it, not a damn day later my skin was blue and my dreams are plagued with people telling me I'm going to die."
"So you need me to bring the book back and hopefully uncurse you? Sounds simple enough."
"One problem uhh the guy I gave the book to still has it, and he uhh doesn't have a problem with whats about to happen to me."
"So you need me to get the book back and then return it? Still shouldn't be that hard."
"The guy who has it runs a cult up in the mountains of a stronghold." Nidget blurted it out like a child telling you they just pissed on the floor.
I stared at him for a second, rubbed my beard and then said, "I hate you so much Nidget."
"It was more complicated than that Trezlan." Nidget was sitting on the ground (I had no chairs, or furniture, its always the simple things you forget when starting over), he seemed moderately annoyed at me guessing at what had happened.
"All right enlighten me."
"Ok so I was took on a job to aquire an object."
"Steal."
"Aquire," He made sure to highlight aquire, again he was stealing it, "The object was a holy book to a god named Shamanar..."
"Wait Shamanar? I've litterally never heard of this god." And here I thought I knew everything, well I tell people I know everything, same thing really.
"You are just going to interupt me this whole time aren't you?"
"Yes."
"So anyway this book, was apparently though lost during the war, but I found it fairly easily, it was at monastery on the coast. I thought maybe the monks had been killed or something, because it appeared empty when I got inside and the book was just waiting on a pedestal."
"And that didn't cause you to worry at all that the book was just sitting out in the open like that and no one else had ever taken it?"
"Nope."
"Gods you're an idiot, continue."
"So I grabbed the book, see it wasn't even stealing it was just out in the open! And gave it to the guy who wanted it, not a damn day later my skin was blue and my dreams are plagued with people telling me I'm going to die."
"So you need me to bring the book back and hopefully uncurse you? Sounds simple enough."
"One problem uhh the guy I gave the book to still has it, and he uhh doesn't have a problem with whats about to happen to me."
"So you need me to get the book back and then return it? Still shouldn't be that hard."
"The guy who has it runs a cult up in the mountains of a stronghold." Nidget blurted it out like a child telling you they just pissed on the floor.
I stared at him for a second, rubbed my beard and then said, "I hate you so much Nidget."
Thursday, August 2, 2012
Blue Me Away
"Nidget I don't have to do anything for you." You'll wonder how I went from him being my savior to him being my annoyance, theres not some big story here. I know his family is a den of thieves and he lived down to their expectations. I know just about every problem Nidget gets into are his own damn making, and anytime he comes to me for anything its because he's tried every one else and I'm his last resort. Which is insulting! I should be his first turn down not his last!
"You owe me Lorentino, you owe my family!" Nidget was in the dark in my store (Rosetia had electricity, but not in the outlying areas where I was located, and I hadn't really bothered to set up oil lamps). I was a bit put off by him being in the shadows, its never a good thing for a thief to be in hiding.
"Come out of the dark so I can see you clearly Nidget, I'm not negotiating with the darkness." He emerged and I laughed. I laughed and laughed. I actually lost my footing and fell to the ground laughing. He tried talking to me a couple times and all I could do was laugh.
"This is serious Trezlan."
"I can see that you are real blue in the face about it." I laughed some more. You see Nidget was head to toe blue, his entire skin color had been changed to deep sea blue. So you may see why I had an issue taking him seriously.
"Trezlan come on help me."
"Ok Nidget let me go find a can of paint and we'll fix you right up." He frowned at me and gods help me I tried to take him seriously.
"I'm cursed Trezlan, I need your help to get it taken off." I've dealt with curses, never ones that turned someones skin blue, but there is a first time for everything, my normal motto.
"Get Andre to help you, he's like your life partner or something?" Nidget looked away.
"He's at some kind of religious retreat! I don't have time for him to come back!"
"Ok ok I can help you Nidget, but you'll have to tell me everything, and I do mean everything, and you'll have to agree to watch my store while I'm gone."
"Why can't I come with you?"
"Because I respect myself way too much to have a blue shorty following me around." And with that Nidget told me how he got cursed blue, and why that meant he was in dire need of help. Its an interesting story actually... you know the drill.
"You owe me Lorentino, you owe my family!" Nidget was in the dark in my store (Rosetia had electricity, but not in the outlying areas where I was located, and I hadn't really bothered to set up oil lamps). I was a bit put off by him being in the shadows, its never a good thing for a thief to be in hiding.
"Come out of the dark so I can see you clearly Nidget, I'm not negotiating with the darkness." He emerged and I laughed. I laughed and laughed. I actually lost my footing and fell to the ground laughing. He tried talking to me a couple times and all I could do was laugh.
"This is serious Trezlan."
"I can see that you are real blue in the face about it." I laughed some more. You see Nidget was head to toe blue, his entire skin color had been changed to deep sea blue. So you may see why I had an issue taking him seriously.
"Trezlan come on help me."
"Ok Nidget let me go find a can of paint and we'll fix you right up." He frowned at me and gods help me I tried to take him seriously.
"I'm cursed Trezlan, I need your help to get it taken off." I've dealt with curses, never ones that turned someones skin blue, but there is a first time for everything, my normal motto.
"Get Andre to help you, he's like your life partner or something?" Nidget looked away.
"He's at some kind of religious retreat! I don't have time for him to come back!"
"Ok ok I can help you Nidget, but you'll have to tell me everything, and I do mean everything, and you'll have to agree to watch my store while I'm gone."
"Why can't I come with you?"
"Because I respect myself way too much to have a blue shorty following me around." And with that Nidget told me how he got cursed blue, and why that meant he was in dire need of help. Its an interesting story actually... you know the drill.
Wednesday, August 1, 2012
Law and Disorder
"I'm going to kill you!" It was a nightmare, but the voice seemed insistent and I've learned that ignoring things that threaten your doom is not to your benefit as a person (I say learned, but in reality its more been forced to learn). I woke up in a sweat, I'd been sleeping in the mostly empty shop for the past few days, it had recently been constructed and I was in the proccess of finishing the job (mostly cursing at sub par construction and pounding nails into things). I didn't really have a bed, so much as some blankets on the floor (not the worst thing I've slept on let me tell you, which I probably have). I figured the nightmare had woken me up, but as my groggy self staggered off the cold wooden floor I could hear the sounds of conflict outside.
At first I thought maybe I was still dreaming, or just imagining the sounds of screams and gun fire, but no when I got out of my bedroom I could see through my windows there was a problem brewing outside. It was a rash of corrupted, though unlike the two bandits I'd dealt with on the way up, these were more mindless drones, probably being lead by a more intelligent also insane corrupted (thats the weird thing about the corruption, they are slobbering mad crazy, but work in groups like a hive mind, having been into the depths of madness I didn't remember some overall goal, but admittedly I wasn't amongst their ranks for long). Therod was out in the middle of them her claymore sword cutting a swath through the ranks, chunks of flesh splattered off the blade as she swung it like I've seen some band stand people swing batons.
I sighed to myself and went and grabbed my weapons, I had just overpaid to get a half shop erected, I was not about to let some corrupted jack holes destroy it. So with my sword, revolver and grump (grumpyness is the ultimate deadly weapon), I waded into the chaos. I figured that Captain Therod wouldn't have an issue with me using magic to save the unpaved wooden shackled area of the city I called home, and she sort of nodded at me as I took up a position on her right. The corrupted were scary, but ultimately easy to dispatch, they weren't even that organized or plentiful. Therod and her guards with some assistance from me dealt with them easily enough (I did manage to see Valrym at one point, he looked at me with his unique scorn I guess he's a reserve Guard member, which when I found out had me laughing pretty hard, the group that hates magic employs a god).
"Thank you for your assistance Mr. Lorentino." Its the nicest Therod has ever been to me, and thats saying something.
"I hope these attacks aren't common, I'd hate for it to affect my property values." She had walked me back to my store, though I think that was more that so she could watch over me and not make sure this wasn't my attack or plan. She didn't say anything just turned around and walked off. I stepped into the store and knew someone else was in there with me.
"Trezlan you have to help me I'm about to get killed!" And thats where I'll leave you.
At first I thought maybe I was still dreaming, or just imagining the sounds of screams and gun fire, but no when I got out of my bedroom I could see through my windows there was a problem brewing outside. It was a rash of corrupted, though unlike the two bandits I'd dealt with on the way up, these were more mindless drones, probably being lead by a more intelligent also insane corrupted (thats the weird thing about the corruption, they are slobbering mad crazy, but work in groups like a hive mind, having been into the depths of madness I didn't remember some overall goal, but admittedly I wasn't amongst their ranks for long). Therod was out in the middle of them her claymore sword cutting a swath through the ranks, chunks of flesh splattered off the blade as she swung it like I've seen some band stand people swing batons.
I sighed to myself and went and grabbed my weapons, I had just overpaid to get a half shop erected, I was not about to let some corrupted jack holes destroy it. So with my sword, revolver and grump (grumpyness is the ultimate deadly weapon), I waded into the chaos. I figured that Captain Therod wouldn't have an issue with me using magic to save the unpaved wooden shackled area of the city I called home, and she sort of nodded at me as I took up a position on her right. The corrupted were scary, but ultimately easy to dispatch, they weren't even that organized or plentiful. Therod and her guards with some assistance from me dealt with them easily enough (I did manage to see Valrym at one point, he looked at me with his unique scorn I guess he's a reserve Guard member, which when I found out had me laughing pretty hard, the group that hates magic employs a god).
"Thank you for your assistance Mr. Lorentino." Its the nicest Therod has ever been to me, and thats saying something.
"I hope these attacks aren't common, I'd hate for it to affect my property values." She had walked me back to my store, though I think that was more that so she could watch over me and not make sure this wasn't my attack or plan. She didn't say anything just turned around and walked off. I stepped into the store and knew someone else was in there with me.
"Trezlan you have to help me I'm about to get killed!" And thats where I'll leave you.
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