Ghosting

There are a few things that are difficult to process. One of them is the will of the gods, they are completely insane in most ways at all times (even the fire god seemingly does things for no reason whatsoever), the second is the afterlife. Like I've been to the afterlife (well the bad/good place you go if you worship the fire god, or are killed by someone who does, you know never really thought about that very hard, not going to start), but I still don't understand what happens when you die other than you stop being alive. So trying to figure out why half an entire town is populated by ghosts still doing their thing was beyond me.

I observed them, talked with them, and tried to ask them why they were still here. The saddest part was all of them claimed they weren't dead and I was being ridiculous even when I could literally put my hand through them, they wondered what magic trick I was using. The people I talked to were partially terrified. One of them even admitted he'd actually killed his brother and it was more than a little strange that not only was his brother still around, but completely not aware that he had in fact killed him.

My first thought was to try a couple rituals I had kicking around in my head (thanks to years of necromancing horrible people I have a lot of really awful knowledge on things I wish I didn't), but most of them were untested, dangerous and probably wouldn't even work (though I had one that involved the sacrifice of a goat and a virgin male at the same time I was pretty sure would cure erectile problems, obviously nothing about ghosts and I don't need it at all, but there are times I'm really tempted to try it... FOR SCIENCE!). I didn't through a strength of will and basically because I thought they wouldn't shit except make things worse (another day blood rituals of dubious value!) Instead I returned to my book reading roots and tried to learn everything I could about the town, I hit up their archives, library, news paper office, even went to other towns in the area to check things out. And I found absolutely nothing.

I mean I found a lot about boring completely stupid things sure. But never before in the history of the town was there some ghost reawakening. So I was left with a problem I didn't know how it started and ghosts who didn't know they were a problem to begin with. To say I was upset at this turn of events was to ignore everything that makes me up as a person. Thankfully a ghost finally let me in on what had happened, unthankfully it only made everything a million times worse.

I Don't See Any Ghosts

"You'll have to repeat that." To say I was incredulous to the belief a town could be harassed by ghosts would be an understatement.

"We have a ghost problem Mr. Lorentino." Boggs was trying to be super serious, but I almost laughed. I mean ghosts can be obnoxious, at times they can even be a little dangerous, but a problem? Please, problems are like me, or ravenous rats that eat only the flesh off the balls of your feet (the tastiest of flesh), ghosts are never a real problem (ignoring in the past when they have been a real problem of course).

"I don't see any ghosts, haven't sensed any either." I admit I wasn't exactly looking for them though, because I'm obtuse like that.

"You didn't notice my secretary, she's not alive Mr. Lorentino!" Ok here's a hypothetical if the guy you hired to solve your ghost problem did not notice that well over half your town was actually ghosts, would you keep that man employed? No? Well than you are a better Mayor, than Mayor Boggs. I say this as the person they hired to do this job I was clearly bad at.

"Wait, she's not alive but she's still functioning as a secretary?" I'd heard of ghosts doing strange things, still showing up for work was definitely the weirdest.

"She never leaves now! She died last year, I was in the process of looking for a new secretary when she showed up for work again! It was like she never left, had no memory of dying and think I'm kidding when I point out, she never actually leaves. Its like that all over town! No one stays dead! We had a ship captain get accidentally harpooned bringing in a large catch, even though the harpoon pierced his damn head, he was back to work the next day!" I was perplexed, I admit I had expected some crappy trap left by Morley, not some weird people don't know they are dead issue. It was one of those conundrums.

"Why is this a bad thing?"

"Because its not natural Mr. Lorentino! People should be allowed to die and move on to the afterlife, not be stuck here still doing what they did in life. I loved my secretary, but she's dead, she should rest." It was heartwarming to see the mayor so concerned with how people spent their afterlife. I mean I know of a lot of people who think of still working ghosts as the greatest thing ever.

"Was there some kind of incident that set this whole thing off?"

"If I knew that I wouldn't have called you in Mr. Lorentino!" He seemed angry (because he was) but honestly it was a valid question! I mean you might have known some weird rock slammed into a cemetary and ever since than the dead rose, or there was a blood ritual or something. Obviously none of that happened, but I didn't ask the stupidest question in the world! Anyway the Mayor rudely excused me from his office with a direction of "just fix it" and so I set out to figure out why ghosts didn't want to be dead. Truly the most thankless of tasks.

Vacation? I'm Working Here

"Welcome to Samorito!" The clerk looked about ten, his voice was high and squeaky. The hotel itself looked fairly decent for a hotel next to the ocean which generally meant people came for the view and not the accommodations (well they used to I was still getting used to all this modern stuff everyone else just accepted). I don't know why the clerk at the hotel was welcoming me, it wasn't he first building I'd come across since getting off the train, it wasn't even the first person I'd seen in town, but here he was welcoming me in because I guess I needed it? Look I'm terrible with social stuff.

"You have my room ready for me, Lorentino, I paid for a large suite." The modern convenience of being able to call up a place a few days out and tell them you are coming is one of my favorite things about modern times, it almost makes me look past all the horrible things I hate about it. And yes I don't stay in shitty rooms, nor do I ride in coach on a train. I've got the money I enjoy myself even if I don't enjoy myself going out and doing things. If that makes any sense. The young man got a key off the wall and showed me up to the room. It was fairly large with a nice wooden desk and all the proper modern amenities (electricity, running water, even a phone!) I put my bags away, and made sure to properly secure the room (some sigils, some wards, stocking booze, the booze was the important part) and then went out to see my client.

It had been six months since I saved the world again (look stopping Morley's spy is saving the world, trust me on this!) and word of my amazingness had spread to even quaint east coast coastal towns! So much so that the mayor had called me in personally to deal with a magical situation. Ordinarily I'd figure this was a trap and the town was some horrible horror, but since I was now bonafide I knew for sure it was probably a trap and the town was some horrible horror! See I'm improving, instead of suspecting something was off, I knew something was off! But since it was a coastal town and the summer I figured hey might as well enjoy it before the wheels come off and everyone in town was shown to be a spider person (it could happen, I believe it has happened already!)

The Mayor's office was a small building near the docks, it had one polite secretary named Doris, and a room with the mayor that just had "Mayor" as a name plate. Being an elected official I guess they turned over often enough they didn't feel the need to actually put a name under the mayor's door. The Mayor was a large man named Jonesy Boggs. He just screamed small town bureaucrat from the moment I met him in his what felt way too small office, even if it did have a nice view of the docks, I could even see a light house to the left, picturesque.

"Thank the gods you could get here Mr. Lorentino, we have a problem."

"Thanks for inviting me Mr. Mayor, how can Trezlan Lorentino help you today?" I was again expecting trap, but Boggs earnest speech was very inviting, so even more certainly a trap.

"Ghosts Mr. Lorentino, we have a huge problem with Ghosts." And thus began well not a trap in the traditional sense, but you know it still could be a trap, I always suspect trap even years after the events proved it wasn't a trap at all. I'm crafty like that.

A Cure To Nothing

"So this was all for nothing." Valerie was crestfallen that her work on a poison antidote was wasted. People are like that, they focus on the stupid part of a story and not the cool part (the cool part me using blood magic to murder a city official and getting away with it!).

"Well not for nothing I mean you have a cure for a face melting poison that had to count for something." It actually doesn't count for anything, as if anyone keeps count of any of this.

"Well I don't know, I think I have an antidote, but I don't have a victim to try it on, nor the base poison to cancel it."

"Ok so you maybe have nothing." I was not going to volunteer to try this the love potion turned my pee violet. I don't even want to know what it did to my insides to make my urine violet and frankly I don't want to know.

"How did you avoid getting arrested again?" Her flustered nature wasn't doing her any favors with me, but I don't think Valerie really cared since I'd gotten her involved and ultimately her work solved and did nothing. Which is my usual, so I didn't see why she was all hurt about it, sure I hadn't done this to her previously, but she should get used to this kind of crushing disappointment! Toughens her up.

"Apparently the secretive power behind the power suspected Dupont for some time, once he made his move against me, they made their move against him. It all works out in the end!" There was a bit of a warning about using blood magic, they had their eye on me etc etc, standard threats you know from this journal.

"If we're done I'd like for you to leave, I don't know why you came here anyway."

"To tell you you didn't have to keep working, see if I'm nice to you like that, ever again."

"It would be nice if you paid me for my work!" She shouted it as I was leaving because well I didn't want to pay for work I didn't actually need. Yes I'm a dick like that, look I don't get paid half the time when I do something, how dare she expect me to pay her for something she didn't even guarantee would work! I tell you the nerve of some people!

Duplicitous Dupont

I recalled when I purchased the desk I specifically wanted something with hard wood so that it could block bullets. At the time I figured I'd upset someone just by being in business (despite magic being widespread and accepted there are people who deny it exists its very werid) but it did manage to absorb the first magazine of Dupont's pistol quite well. Unfortunately for me I didn't have my own pistol to return fire, it was locked in a bottom drawer and the keys were on top of the desk in open view of the person shooting at me. I could have used some fire but I didn't want to ruin my own damned office with the smell of a smoking body. Yes even when my life is threatened I self select how I defend myself.

"Trezlan why are you hiding back there you should be using your magic to show me what a big strong man you are." And here was where I was happy I hadn't just used magic, because clearly Dupont had some kind of counter to it.

"You'll know it when you feel Dupont you sniveling coward." I had no idea what my plan was going to be, but I knew it would work against Dupont because I'm an optimist.

"Even if Morley didn't want you dead, I'd kill you anyway Lorentino, you're a shit person, you've done nothing good for this world and taking you out of it will be a benefit. That I'm going to be made very powerful because of it is just a bonus."

"You're a bigger idiot than I expected if you think Morley will give you anything but a quick death if you kill me Dupont. I know that man better than anyone and he doesn't share." Dupont came into my office firing I could hear the wood buckling under the weight of his gunshots and I think at this point he realized I didn't have much else other than my magic. And I thought for a minute I really was boned, and then I recalled the incomplete necromancy left by the late Mrs. Chance. I hadn't exactly "disarmed" it as much as realized it wasn't finished, so with some words and a bit of my own blood I closed the loop just as Dupont was about to come over my desk.

The spell was not a pretty way of going, Mrs. Chance was not an accomplished necromancer, and in her amateur application her spell was way too much brute force and no nuance (so exactly like Morley's necromancy). It basically turned Dupont inside out. Which did wonders for my flooring as his corpse went up in a flood of blood and guts. Just as guard members who had been called to the sound of gunfire came into see their former boss splattered across my floor. They were understandably weapons drawn.

"I didn't do it!" Which was a lie, but that's me, a liar even with the evidence oozing on my floor boards.

By The Time You Read this I'll Be Dead

-Dear Mr. Lorentino

By the time you read this I'll already be dead, there was nothing you could do to stop me from dying. The poison I'd been injected with was going to kill me either way. If you witnessed my death I apologize for what was probably confusing and scary. This is weird to say, but you are the only person aside from my father I can probably relate to. And it is because of my father I had to take my own life.

My father is a man you know well, Victor Morley, when he found out you were still alive and back in town he wanted me to do everything in my power to kill you using the necromancy he taught me. I refused and his agent killed my husband and then poisoned me making my only option to take your life to spare my own. I would not do this and so I knew I was doomed.

You will think with my death the danger is over, but it is not, right now my father's agent is loose in the city, his plan is to kill you one way or another and he has been taught by my father to do that very well. Trust no one you have met, Morley's hatred of you is very personal and he has had time to establish himself all over the world. I realize how evil he is now, and how he's willing to kill his own child to wound his enemy, I wish I had not been born.

I finished reading the note and felt sad. There were a couple tear stains on the paper clearly writing the note had been very difficult (probably because she was planning on killing herself, though wishing she had never been born would probably be equally as heart breaking). I didn't have a whole lot of time to digest the woman's note as Dupont showed up and pointed his pistol at me.

"Captain Dupont decided to arrest me after all?" I discarded the note in my little trash bin. I did notice there were no other guard members with Dupont. And that's when he opened fire on me, because Dupont was clearly Morley's agent and I had just found out about that a half second too late (I'll blame the hand writing here, her writing was atrocious and the ink had smeared, yes I blamed a dead woman for not properly warning me about an ambush she didn't exactly know was coming, SUE ME!)

Confused My Natural State of Being

Defusing someone elses attempt at necromancy even after they are dead is not exactly easy, or fun, or something I would want to do, but since this was my own damn office I felt I had to actually get back inside somehow. So there I was trying to sort out if the dead woman in my office had actually used a blood trap of some kind, or was she just lying. The answer was somewhere in the middle, it appeared she had made an attempt at one, but in typical amateur fashion she had not actually completed the actual trap. I say appeared because even though it didn't look completed it was still very very dangerous (its like explosive, sure it looks like the person didn't set the bomb up right, but that still doesn't mean the magic wasn't potentially very lethal, plus she took her own life, a way to super charge necromancy). I wish I had a rat or an annoying child to test it out on, but since the only other living thing with me was Valerie and as assholish as I am I didn't feel it was nice enough to just let her step in and hope for the best. So I did using all of my of magical tricks (also known as gingerly walking in and hoping I didn't explode into a huge flesh bomb) as I am still writing this journal clearly I didn't explode in flesh and sadness.

"Why would she do that to herself?" It was a good question, I mean she literally cornered herself waiting for me, and then killed herself, if she was trying to implicate me in the murder it was a bad effort, I mean it would be obvious to anyone who looked at the body she killed herself in horrifying fashion.

"No clue, she trapped herself in here, kind of tried to kill me and then killed herself, honestly I wish most of my enemies did that." After verifying it was safe we left to go to Captain Dupont, because I'm not an idiot and I didn't want to be accused of another murder.

"So you're saying you came across Mr. Chance's wife she talked very briefly about not coming and closer and then killed herself." Dupont did not seemingly sound convinced, I still had Valerie with me, but I was really thinking that wasn't the smartest move in case Dupont arrested both of us.

"That's exactly what happened Captain Dupont I can vouch for Trezlan." Valerie was doing her best to get arrested along side me.

"That's just confusing." Dupont sounded literally bewildered, it was nice to have someone who's first move wasn't to just blame me anyway. I mean I'm sure that was his second move, but it was nice to have a delay.

"That's what I thought Captain Dupont, clearly though you can solve your case, wife did it, overcome with grief and fear of being caught she killed herself in my office." He looked at me like I was being overly callous and then shrugged his shoulders.

"Works for me, I'll send someone to get the body." True to his word he did send someone to collect the body (the blood I had to clean up, it ruined my new desk even, what a selfish person!). Valerie left me to work on the poison (despite the case being solved she wanted to find out what actually killed chance) and the pajama people seemingly left me alone as well. So I thought everything was resolved until I noticed one of my books out of order and found the note the dead Mrs. Chance had left, and like all things in my stupid life things got more complicated right quick.