"How's business?" Councilman so and so I can't recall his name, he popped into my shop every once in a while to shake me down for political donations and talk business (so he could decide on how much to shake me down for). It was still winter, holidays were over, but the only thing I was selling was the occaisional heavy coat that lasted years so I didn't sell them very often (despite several attempts I never found a good coat that was warm that didn't last past a season, I still try though). Technically I was in this councilman's district, but its not like I ever saw a direct benefit to the pseudo bribery other than him leaving my store for a time.
"Slow." I always told him slow, even when I'm busy, because again he uses it to see how much money he can take from me.
"How slow? Because I've got a little problem I heard a person like you can solve with little issue." This kind of thing comes up from time to time, even today in a new city in a new government entirely, word gets out that I'm a solver of stupid problems and stupid problems come find me. Normally its reading some misforgotten language for an idiot who doesn't realize the "ancient" magic they found is actually a dirty limerick or a crappy stew recipe (not entirely their fault as I tend to sell these very things on the downlow to dirt merchants as a way to make some coin on the side, what can I say I'm not honest). Occaisionally though my reputation of slayer of beasts will arise and some misguided soul will think that their problem of the day is now my problem.
"Not that slow Councilman."
"You know its a shame you are looting this community and not really adding to it Lorentino, I heard theres going to be a vote on property tax increases coming up, would be a shame if yours went up."
"And wouldn't you know it business slowed down just enough for me to get away." Guilt trips, like normal trips always leave you feeling mildly pissed off for the journey.
"Excellent, I've heard of some merchants being harrased by a weird creature on the Northern trade routes, the town guard considers it Ronerawth militarys job to patrol trade routes, and the Empire feels its a local issue not worth military support."
"And you just can't hire a mercenary?"
"Because you are one and you won't charge will you Trezlan?" I hate when people put you on the spot and then be a dick about it knowing they have you on the spot.
"Northern trade route right? How far north?"
"Just outside of the plains where the ground becomes less grass more hard scrabble rock." With that he left my shop, he had the smug grin of someone who knew they got what they wanted at the expense of what the other person wanted. My staff still wasn't back from their holiday yet, so I gathered my supplies in silence, put a sign on the door that said "Gone Adventuring." And got on my horse and set out for the north. I hoped it wouldn't be more than a week to take care of the issue, but I knew in my luck I'd be lucky to live at all, and not have like fifty years pass between when I set off and when I got back (You never know, could get stuck in like a time cave or something, its probably happened to someone, some time).
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