Quit Drinking, or a new Reason to Drink More

Rolando was stumbling back to base drunk. It had been a hard few weeks and he'd found solace in drinking like his father before him. The rest of the shit squad was off planet, they had actual jobs to do, where as Rolando's only job was not to piss himself and he was struggling at that. He probably would have smelled the spider men creeping up on him ordinarily. But seeing how drunk he was he didn't even notice they were there until they were literally almost on top of him.

"Whoa holy shit you are the most realistic looking halucination." Rolando held out his hand to the half man spider its cleaming maw dripping with venom. Before the creature could bite Rolando clued into his mistake and shifted away. The creature bit where his hand was and smashed into the wall Rolando had been relieving himself on. Rolando reached for his pistol before realizing he'd left it at the base for fear of shooting himself while drunk. The creature reared up to bite him again and he shifted home. Arriving back inside to be surrounded by more of the spider creatures and stuck in web they'd spun. These other spiders were a mixture of the people ones and real ones. Rolando was beginning to worry he'd gotten too drunk and this was the worst nightmare ever. Confirming the nightmare feeling, Rolando could only look on in amusement when a man in armor and a flaming hammer came bursting in to fight the spiders. The creatures fled from the man in Armor and Rolando vomitted in the web which caused it to stick and surround him.

"Did they bite you?" Rolando couldn't understand what he was saying, the words made sense, but he was too drunk to process them. The man in the armor was twice Rolando's size.

"Who in the what?" The man in armor frowned noticing how drunk Rolando was. He threw Rolando on to the shoulder opposite his flaming hammer and started to leave.

"This will be easier not in a place they can find us Lieutenant Lorentino, you'll have to trust me, so don't go shifting somewhere else." Though the man in armor didn't have to worry, Rolando passed out shortly after being tossed up on his shoulder.