"I represent the heir to the Hanlon fortune." The guy was dressed in a nice slick suit, the kind of suit you order in pieces and pay a lot of money to have sewn up. He wore it well, even if the man inside it seemed slimier than a sewer.
"I wasn't aware there was either an heir or a fortune." Hanlon wasn't a real person, not like you (well maybe are you real either?) or me, I doubted he had children. I mean the real Hanlon probably did once, but the current incarnation certainly did not. As to his fortune, again I don't know where Hanlon got his weaponry (no factories anymore no delivery, they just seemed to appear out of thin air) nor what he did with the money he aquired. So there could be a fortune, but I doubted very much there was an heir to it.
"Irrelevant, my client would like to meet with you to discuss a business proposition." The way he said business proposition was one of those saying one thing meaning eight hundred different things.
"Let me guess you need me to go somewhere else to meet your client." He smiled and produced a train ticket and a ticket for a boat, gods do I hate boats.
"It's all been arranged Mr. Lorentino, he's even willing to pay for your shops downtime since you appear to be without a staff to keep it open." True Nidget was doing Nidget things, and despite having turned my shop over to other people in the past, I wasn't doing that now.
"All for a meeting with someone who might get money later, you'll have to forgive me Mr.?"
"Simons."
"Mr. Simons, I'm a bit leery, and I have had some issues in the past with these kind of deals going south very fast."
"I assure you Mr. Lorentino you'll have the time of your life, consider this a vacation with some business on the side." Being that I'm a liar all the time, this felt like eight different kind of lies. I was intrigued that they sent such a confident liar to trick me into a meeting. Afraid, but intrigued. So of course I accepted. I shouldn't have, recent/past/every experience I ever had said this was a bad move, but I love making bad moves, helps keep me alive. Well not really. Also no spider monsters today either (you totally thought I wouldn't keep doing that, YOU THOUGHT WRONG!)
Tuesday, April 30, 2013
Monday, April 29, 2013
There Are No Spider Monsters here
"This is entirely uneccesary." Therod's people were looking through my store shelves and supply for anything magical. How you look for that stuff is beyond me, especially for people who were decidely not magical themselves, but I would never correct my betters ever.
"Lorentino I know you have objects here you are no supposed to have so just show me them and we can move on to the fining phase of this." Therod using logic only someone who enforces laws could come up with. "Look I can't prove anything, so you do the hard part for me and we can than arrest you."
"How about no to both? I mean honestly Therod this is how you repay me for saving your life." She grumbled and kept looking I shrugged at Nidget and he yawned. See this is the excitement that makes up my life! Outside of the inspection (they found nothing) there wasn't a lot going on. Nidget would leave a week later to do Nidget stuff and I was left alone to manage the store I'd been ignoring to fight in foreign wars (gods I wish I was making that up). My days were quite boring, I had the occaisional check of my store from Therod, but outside of that nothing was going on. I just sat around sold some objects and waiting for the next idiotic adventure (there are always idiotic adventures).
It took a month, but it came along when a man in a huge hat came walking into the store with a vacation opportunity. Let this be a lesson kids, when a man offers you a vacation opportunity, just say no. Also happy to report no spider monsters today.
"Lorentino I know you have objects here you are no supposed to have so just show me them and we can move on to the fining phase of this." Therod using logic only someone who enforces laws could come up with. "Look I can't prove anything, so you do the hard part for me and we can than arrest you."
"How about no to both? I mean honestly Therod this is how you repay me for saving your life." She grumbled and kept looking I shrugged at Nidget and he yawned. See this is the excitement that makes up my life! Outside of the inspection (they found nothing) there wasn't a lot going on. Nidget would leave a week later to do Nidget stuff and I was left alone to manage the store I'd been ignoring to fight in foreign wars (gods I wish I was making that up). My days were quite boring, I had the occaisional check of my store from Therod, but outside of that nothing was going on. I just sat around sold some objects and waiting for the next idiotic adventure (there are always idiotic adventures).
It took a month, but it came along when a man in a huge hat came walking into the store with a vacation opportunity. Let this be a lesson kids, when a man offers you a vacation opportunity, just say no. Also happy to report no spider monsters today.
Friday, April 26, 2013
Oww My Head OH SHIT SPIDER!
Waking up after getting hit in the head with a door is always a tireseome experience. First you have to get your bearings (how did you fall, did you smash anything on the way down, etc etc), then you have that horrible head pain from where the impact occurs (that usually lasts a couple hours, really bad hits can last a few days). Then you have to deal with whatever knocked you out (rock creature, precariously placed package, Nidget that last one several times). Its become old hat for me, but at the same time I still have things that cause me to pause after recovering from a bump on the head.
Take for instance this sewer adventure, I came to what felt like a few minutes past getting knocked out. I noticed there were a couple dead bodies of guards near my feet, probably killed by Therod. I could hear shouting coming from down the hallway, so I stumbled towards it. As I rounded the corner I came into what looked more like a central chamber, along the walls were more of those damned spider eggs, corpses underneath them probably for the little monsters to eat when they woke up, and a gigantic spider was fighting Therod and Nidget in the middle.
Nidget was on its back pounding it with his fists and doing absolutely nothing. Therod was using what looked like Jenkins arm and a sword to try and keep the huge fangs from impaling her (how did I know it was Jenkins arm you ask? His armless body laying near by). I was tempted at first to just believe this was some kind of impact related fantasy (it would sadly not be my first) but knowing what I had come from prior to being knocked out this seemed pretty real. My second instinct was to go "Well good luck with that" and leave, but per my speech prior to getting knocked out I was a problem solver, and a gigantic spider with a bunch of her young in the sewers of the town I lived in was a huge freaking problem.
Fire, fire was the solution (it truely is the cure to just about everything, well aside from fires and fire monsters, but you know the first one has a counter in water and we were in a sewer, and the second thing doesn't happen that often, shit wait by me writing that it means I'm destined now to deal with more fire monsters, damn you universe). I burned the eggs, I burned the spider creature, I even burned some bodies because when you're on a roll you uhhh set fire to more things. The smell was pretty bad, but it was the sewers so its not like it was a flowery field to begin with. Nidget and Therod were totally appreciative of my efforts, and by that I mean they cursed me for almost setting them both on fire, and the day was won.
The tax division hired a new guy to collect property taxes, Therod thanked me for my efforts by raiding my store looking for magical objecst and found nothing, and Nidget kept being an annoying little jerk. Tada life went back to normal. At least we didn't have to deal with spider monters for a little bit. And thats always a good thing to right down in any daily journal "No spider monsters today" in fact I'll start marking that down more often!
Take for instance this sewer adventure, I came to what felt like a few minutes past getting knocked out. I noticed there were a couple dead bodies of guards near my feet, probably killed by Therod. I could hear shouting coming from down the hallway, so I stumbled towards it. As I rounded the corner I came into what looked more like a central chamber, along the walls were more of those damned spider eggs, corpses underneath them probably for the little monsters to eat when they woke up, and a gigantic spider was fighting Therod and Nidget in the middle.
Nidget was on its back pounding it with his fists and doing absolutely nothing. Therod was using what looked like Jenkins arm and a sword to try and keep the huge fangs from impaling her (how did I know it was Jenkins arm you ask? His armless body laying near by). I was tempted at first to just believe this was some kind of impact related fantasy (it would sadly not be my first) but knowing what I had come from prior to being knocked out this seemed pretty real. My second instinct was to go "Well good luck with that" and leave, but per my speech prior to getting knocked out I was a problem solver, and a gigantic spider with a bunch of her young in the sewers of the town I lived in was a huge freaking problem.
Fire, fire was the solution (it truely is the cure to just about everything, well aside from fires and fire monsters, but you know the first one has a counter in water and we were in a sewer, and the second thing doesn't happen that often, shit wait by me writing that it means I'm destined now to deal with more fire monsters, damn you universe). I burned the eggs, I burned the spider creature, I even burned some bodies because when you're on a roll you uhhh set fire to more things. The smell was pretty bad, but it was the sewers so its not like it was a flowery field to begin with. Nidget and Therod were totally appreciative of my efforts, and by that I mean they cursed me for almost setting them both on fire, and the day was won.
The tax division hired a new guy to collect property taxes, Therod thanked me for my efforts by raiding my store looking for magical objecst and found nothing, and Nidget kept being an annoying little jerk. Tada life went back to normal. At least we didn't have to deal with spider monters for a little bit. And thats always a good thing to right down in any daily journal "No spider monsters today" in fact I'll start marking that down more often!
Thursday, April 25, 2013
And the Mockery of My Life Continues
"You're standing too close to the door." Therod, Nidget and I were waiting for our captors to open their heavy iron door and let us pummel the crap out of them (and burn them can't forget the burning).
"I'm standing in perfect position to jump our captors with my magic fury."
"Magic fury seriously Trezlan?" Nidget as always was being a dick.
"I'm a writer Nidget, Magic Fury is huge." I am, and it totally is, I'm starting to sell a lot of products with Magic Fury on them, sure its written on the bottom barely legible, but its there and its catching on!
"Just get back from the door Lorentino." Therod still doubted my abilities. I tell you its like I haven't lived hundreds of years and that doesn't demand respect! Well I have and it does! Sure I don't tell people that because I don't want to get lynched/burned at the stake/something else horrible. But learn from my wisdom plebians!
"No I want to show you and Nidget that I am the true person in control here, I solved this whole issue and I'll be the one to fix it, because thats what I do, I take stupid peoples little problems and rectify them even though I don't actually want to, but you guys bug me so much that I feel I have to." I was intending on going on longer but the door suddenly swung open and clocked me right between the eyes knocking me out. Yes they warned me to not be so close to the door, and I didn't listen to them. So there I was my big moment of heroism and I got knocked out at the start. I tell you its almost like I'm not really a hero at all.
"I'm standing in perfect position to jump our captors with my magic fury."
"Magic fury seriously Trezlan?" Nidget as always was being a dick.
"I'm a writer Nidget, Magic Fury is huge." I am, and it totally is, I'm starting to sell a lot of products with Magic Fury on them, sure its written on the bottom barely legible, but its there and its catching on!
"Just get back from the door Lorentino." Therod still doubted my abilities. I tell you its like I haven't lived hundreds of years and that doesn't demand respect! Well I have and it does! Sure I don't tell people that because I don't want to get lynched/burned at the stake/something else horrible. But learn from my wisdom plebians!
"No I want to show you and Nidget that I am the true person in control here, I solved this whole issue and I'll be the one to fix it, because thats what I do, I take stupid peoples little problems and rectify them even though I don't actually want to, but you guys bug me so much that I feel I have to." I was intending on going on longer but the door suddenly swung open and clocked me right between the eyes knocking me out. Yes they warned me to not be so close to the door, and I didn't listen to them. So there I was my big moment of heroism and I got knocked out at the start. I tell you its almost like I'm not really a hero at all.
Wednesday, April 24, 2013
Its Not That Bad
"Great I'm going to die next to Lorentino and his bad breath." That was Therod I tell you she always finds little things to say to me that are patently insulting. Like bad breath or that I'm a murderer or whatever.
"Its not that bad." It isn't, ok maybe it is I don't know these things, I take breath mints even!
"Its horrible Trezlan its why I'm glad I'm facing this direction upside down." Nidget being helpful as usual.
"Shouldn't we be more concerned with the potential spider doom, than my bad breath." There I go being rational everyone else being all who they are.
"You're bad breath will be with us forever the spiders are a minor issue." Nidget used a blade hidden in the heel of one of his shoes to cut his rope and drop to the ground, once there he kicked the spider eggs into the wall and they exploded in purple slime.
"You could have done that the whole time?"
"Of course, but I had to see what they wanted first before I freed myself, death to spider egg seems well unpleasant." I imagine it is, I mean as the premier spider killer in this group I'm completely averse to spider death. Like its on my top 10 list of ways I don't want to die.
"Pavarossi just get us out of here."
"I dunno Captain Therod what will you give me for freeing you?" As always Nidget was opportunistic.
"I won't kill you immediately for implying you'd leave me here."
"Fair enough, and I know Trezlan will just say he won't be as assholish to me in the future which he already breaks by saying that." True true, I am predictable. Nidget broke the blade off his heel and used it to unlock us (industrious little bugger that one).
"So we've got no weapons except Nidget's little boot knife."
"I broke that in Trezlans shackles, so no knife."
"Ok so no weapons."
"You don't need weapons you have me I am born of fire and destruction! I will destroy our enemies with fiery damnation!" I even conjured fire to show my awesome ability.
"Have a way to burn open a metal door in a stone sewer oh great firemancer?" Therod doubting my abilities as usual.
"Well yes but no, I mean I can but it would cook us inside and leave me without any magical ability."
"Oh how the mighty have fallen." I tell you its like they didn't think the door would open again. I mean it did obviously and I totally helped destory the spider cult of course. But its like you have one small little delay in your righteous fury and people think you are powerless! And by people I mean Therod who's a total dick, yes ladies can be dicks.
"Its not that bad." It isn't, ok maybe it is I don't know these things, I take breath mints even!
"Its horrible Trezlan its why I'm glad I'm facing this direction upside down." Nidget being helpful as usual.
"Shouldn't we be more concerned with the potential spider doom, than my bad breath." There I go being rational everyone else being all who they are.
"You're bad breath will be with us forever the spiders are a minor issue." Nidget used a blade hidden in the heel of one of his shoes to cut his rope and drop to the ground, once there he kicked the spider eggs into the wall and they exploded in purple slime.
"You could have done that the whole time?"
"Of course, but I had to see what they wanted first before I freed myself, death to spider egg seems well unpleasant." I imagine it is, I mean as the premier spider killer in this group I'm completely averse to spider death. Like its on my top 10 list of ways I don't want to die.
"Pavarossi just get us out of here."
"I dunno Captain Therod what will you give me for freeing you?" As always Nidget was opportunistic.
"I won't kill you immediately for implying you'd leave me here."
"Fair enough, and I know Trezlan will just say he won't be as assholish to me in the future which he already breaks by saying that." True true, I am predictable. Nidget broke the blade off his heel and used it to unlock us (industrious little bugger that one).
"So we've got no weapons except Nidget's little boot knife."
"I broke that in Trezlans shackles, so no knife."
"Ok so no weapons."
"You don't need weapons you have me I am born of fire and destruction! I will destroy our enemies with fiery damnation!" I even conjured fire to show my awesome ability.
"Have a way to burn open a metal door in a stone sewer oh great firemancer?" Therod doubting my abilities as usual.
"Well yes but no, I mean I can but it would cook us inside and leave me without any magical ability."
"Oh how the mighty have fallen." I tell you its like they didn't think the door would open again. I mean it did obviously and I totally helped destory the spider cult of course. But its like you have one small little delay in your righteous fury and people think you are powerless! And by people I mean Therod who's a total dick, yes ladies can be dicks.
Tuesday, April 23, 2013
Obvious Reasons For Villainy
"Cease your babbling!" It was Jenkins, the obvious culprit. Well not really the obvious culprit up until he emerged I thought he was the victim of these cultists but no apparently he was leading them.
"Jenkins!" I tried to sound jovial, it was nice to see him.
"Lorentino, Therod, and I don't know who the shorty is." Poor Nidget, he'd even paid my property taxes a few times, guess Jenkins really was a racist.
"Jenkins unshackle me and I promise you'll get a quick clean death." Therod's idea of negotiation. Nidget was silent, I think he was really angry Jenkins did not remember him.
"Yeah about no Captain Therod, you will be one of the first of our glorious new soldiers that will bring our god back to life!" Have I mentioned I hate cultists? I hate cultists.
"You're god? Which one I just have to know." What can I say I'm inquisitive about being that would kill me.
"You should know you murderer you killed her in the first place." Jenkins was quite upset about that, but to be honest I've killed what 2 and a half gods at this point? Like really you'd have to be more specific.
"Can you be more specific?" Jenkins had a hood on and he pulled it back to reveal eggs growing on his head, spider eggs, large ones.
"Does this clarify it for you?" I wanted to be an asshole and pretend not to, but you know sometimes you just have to roll with the punches and not put the two people with you in more danger. Well that and of course it clarified it for me.
"Oh right that spider thing I killed, gods how long ago was that? I mean Dad was still alive so carry the two..." Ok so I was still an asshole just a different type. Jenkins just chuckled, the other cultists/creatures (they were wearing hoods they could have been spider creatures like on the island).
"Joke all you want Lorentino, I'll leave you and your friends a gift from our god, the world will remember Jenk Jenkins when we overtake it with her glorious spawn!" He removed a couple of his head eggs and left the area, the eggs squirmed unsettling on the ground, the door locked tight behind him and his cronies.
"Jenk Jenkins? Wow that makes sense, I mean I'd start a spider death cult too." That was Nidget, NIDGET FOR GODS SAKE! But we all pretty much agreed, I mean the spider death was still a possibility, but at least we knew why Jenkins did it. I mean Jenk? What asshole parents, I say this as someone named Trezlan.
"Jenkins!" I tried to sound jovial, it was nice to see him.
"Lorentino, Therod, and I don't know who the shorty is." Poor Nidget, he'd even paid my property taxes a few times, guess Jenkins really was a racist.
"Jenkins unshackle me and I promise you'll get a quick clean death." Therod's idea of negotiation. Nidget was silent, I think he was really angry Jenkins did not remember him.
"Yeah about no Captain Therod, you will be one of the first of our glorious new soldiers that will bring our god back to life!" Have I mentioned I hate cultists? I hate cultists.
"You're god? Which one I just have to know." What can I say I'm inquisitive about being that would kill me.
"You should know you murderer you killed her in the first place." Jenkins was quite upset about that, but to be honest I've killed what 2 and a half gods at this point? Like really you'd have to be more specific.
"Can you be more specific?" Jenkins had a hood on and he pulled it back to reveal eggs growing on his head, spider eggs, large ones.
"Does this clarify it for you?" I wanted to be an asshole and pretend not to, but you know sometimes you just have to roll with the punches and not put the two people with you in more danger. Well that and of course it clarified it for me.
"Oh right that spider thing I killed, gods how long ago was that? I mean Dad was still alive so carry the two..." Ok so I was still an asshole just a different type. Jenkins just chuckled, the other cultists/creatures (they were wearing hoods they could have been spider creatures like on the island).
"Joke all you want Lorentino, I'll leave you and your friends a gift from our god, the world will remember Jenk Jenkins when we overtake it with her glorious spawn!" He removed a couple of his head eggs and left the area, the eggs squirmed unsettling on the ground, the door locked tight behind him and his cronies.
"Jenk Jenkins? Wow that makes sense, I mean I'd start a spider death cult too." That was Nidget, NIDGET FOR GODS SAKE! But we all pretty much agreed, I mean the spider death was still a possibility, but at least we knew why Jenkins did it. I mean Jenk? What asshole parents, I say this as someone named Trezlan.
Monday, April 22, 2013
Torturous Logic
"Why am I hanging upside down?" Nidget of course was the one to break the blessed silence that had fallen over us since we had woken up in the dungeon? Place of captivity? Lifes little hang up?
"Its tortrue Pavarossi its why I'm shackled next to Lorentino instead of somewhere else."
"That hurt Captain Therod, if I could point I'd point right at my chest where you just stabbed my heart." It really did injure me, I was close to crying.
"But you guys aren't hanging upside down." It was a decent question to ask it pained me to admit.
"Look its because you're short Nidget thats why they did it to you, because you're a shorty and this was their way of restraining you." I swear he was dancing around it and I just had to say it. Yes they punished him because of racism.
"Thank you for admitting it, you're all racist against my kind."
"Here we go."
"What? Why do you say that everytime I point this out?"
"Because Nidget you're an asshole which is why people do bad things to you, does that mean people aren't racist towards shorties? Nope they clearly are, but in specificness to you, you're an asshole, like me, it has nothing to do with our race and everything to do with being assholes."
"Wow Lorentino I'm amazed you admit that." Captain Therod actually sounded shocked.
"Well you still judge both of us because you're a racist Therod."
"Ok thats it when they come in I'm screaming to get moved elsewhere."
"I hope you do, that way Trezlan and I can continue our erudite discussion on your imposing restrictions due to our races."
"I hate you both so much." So I guess Therod was right, we were there to torture her, and like most things in life why fight it is my method of operation. Thankfully for her she didn't have to wait long for our captors to do something with us. Unfortunately for her (and us) that something was well you'll have to wait till the next entry!
"Its tortrue Pavarossi its why I'm shackled next to Lorentino instead of somewhere else."
"That hurt Captain Therod, if I could point I'd point right at my chest where you just stabbed my heart." It really did injure me, I was close to crying.
"But you guys aren't hanging upside down." It was a decent question to ask it pained me to admit.
"Look its because you're short Nidget thats why they did it to you, because you're a shorty and this was their way of restraining you." I swear he was dancing around it and I just had to say it. Yes they punished him because of racism.
"Thank you for admitting it, you're all racist against my kind."
"Here we go."
"What? Why do you say that everytime I point this out?"
"Because Nidget you're an asshole which is why people do bad things to you, does that mean people aren't racist towards shorties? Nope they clearly are, but in specificness to you, you're an asshole, like me, it has nothing to do with our race and everything to do with being assholes."
"Wow Lorentino I'm amazed you admit that." Captain Therod actually sounded shocked.
"Well you still judge both of us because you're a racist Therod."
"Ok thats it when they come in I'm screaming to get moved elsewhere."
"I hope you do, that way Trezlan and I can continue our erudite discussion on your imposing restrictions due to our races."
"I hate you both so much." So I guess Therod was right, we were there to torture her, and like most things in life why fight it is my method of operation. Thankfully for her she didn't have to wait long for our captors to do something with us. Unfortunately for her (and us) that something was well you'll have to wait till the next entry!
Friday, April 19, 2013
It was a Real Gas
"What are you idiots doing here?" It was Therod speaking in the hallway her booming voice was unmistakeable.
"Oh goody the authorities are here put your weapons down boys." I was thankful for the authorities, I tell you it felt weird saying it.
"Trezlan is Nidget in there with you? Did you break into Jenkins apartment?" Of course Therod faced with cloaked figures with pistols would concern herself with a little breaking and entering.
"Would you both shut up we've got the upper hand here." The Cloaked Men not realizing I was there with magic, Nidget with his short scrappyness and Therod with the worst aim in the Guard (its true good gods that woman shoots a pistol so badly I worry anytime she draws it, like standing behind her isn't even safe).
"The upper hand of what we've got you in a pincer attack, and Nidget is a rabid shorty he might go off at any moment." He looked at me sourly because Nidget can't appreciate someone talking up his abilities.
"Trezlan you are not helping this situation." Therod obviously didn't understand talking up Nidget either.
"Would you all shut up!" The lead man dropped something on the ground I figured it might have been a weapon but it was gas. The pellet shattered and filled Jenkins apartment and the hallway with a purple smoke that paralyzed us and then put us to sleep (it was extremely effective). When we woke up Therod and I were shackeled to a wall (me with antimagical shackles from the look of them they were Therod's. Nidget was swinging by his ankles, we were underground, possibly the sewers.
"Well I totally solved the Jenkins thing." I couldn't see Nidget but Therod's face spoke that she did not believe I had. I tell you people these days!
"Oh goody the authorities are here put your weapons down boys." I was thankful for the authorities, I tell you it felt weird saying it.
"Trezlan is Nidget in there with you? Did you break into Jenkins apartment?" Of course Therod faced with cloaked figures with pistols would concern herself with a little breaking and entering.
"Would you both shut up we've got the upper hand here." The Cloaked Men not realizing I was there with magic, Nidget with his short scrappyness and Therod with the worst aim in the Guard (its true good gods that woman shoots a pistol so badly I worry anytime she draws it, like standing behind her isn't even safe).
"The upper hand of what we've got you in a pincer attack, and Nidget is a rabid shorty he might go off at any moment." He looked at me sourly because Nidget can't appreciate someone talking up his abilities.
"Trezlan you are not helping this situation." Therod obviously didn't understand talking up Nidget either.
"Would you all shut up!" The lead man dropped something on the ground I figured it might have been a weapon but it was gas. The pellet shattered and filled Jenkins apartment and the hallway with a purple smoke that paralyzed us and then put us to sleep (it was extremely effective). When we woke up Therod and I were shackeled to a wall (me with antimagical shackles from the look of them they were Therod's. Nidget was swinging by his ankles, we were underground, possibly the sewers.
"Well I totally solved the Jenkins thing." I couldn't see Nidget but Therod's face spoke that she did not believe I had. I tell you people these days!
Thursday, April 18, 2013
No one Ever Appreciates my Fine Work
"And so you see clearly they removed all of the flavor from this apartment, even including removing his more interesting books to leave these boring history books." I'm glad no one seemed to care we were in Jenkins apartment, since we'd been there hours and no one cared.
"Yes of course Jenkins probably had frilly feathers and everything, those were clearly removed from the evidence of dust gathering everywhere and no tracks other than our own."
"I get the impression your being sarcastic Nidget."
"Really? Whatever would give you that impression." Deduction you little shit, wait I didnt' say that at the time, but I totally should have!
"Your sarcasm withheld, I'm sure the solution to the mystery is here in this room. Probably." We'd been searching for anything for the last few hours and hadn't come up with anything, but I just knew if we waited something would appear to me.
"Trezlan I know you don't have anything better to do with your time, but I do, so I am leaving." He opened the door and was greeted by men in cloaks brandishing weapons. Ordinarily I would just assume Therod was being an asshole and having us arrested but these didn't look like any Guard person I'd see working for Therod.
"See Nidget I told you we just wait long enough and we'd find something of interest."
"In the hallway outside of the place we were looking?"
"Gods work in myterious ways."
"Shut up the both of you unless you want to die where you stand." Their leader didn't seem like a very nice person, and he wasn't, but you know I haven't met any group of murderous cult people who are! Which kind of seems the point when you run a murder cult. Which these people totally were in case that wasn't obvious. Anyway how will we survive? How will we get out of this scary predicament? Unexpectedly, well not really unexpectedly, but you know thats tomorrows entry!
"Yes of course Jenkins probably had frilly feathers and everything, those were clearly removed from the evidence of dust gathering everywhere and no tracks other than our own."
"I get the impression your being sarcastic Nidget."
"Really? Whatever would give you that impression." Deduction you little shit, wait I didnt' say that at the time, but I totally should have!
"Your sarcasm withheld, I'm sure the solution to the mystery is here in this room. Probably." We'd been searching for anything for the last few hours and hadn't come up with anything, but I just knew if we waited something would appear to me.
"Trezlan I know you don't have anything better to do with your time, but I do, so I am leaving." He opened the door and was greeted by men in cloaks brandishing weapons. Ordinarily I would just assume Therod was being an asshole and having us arrested but these didn't look like any Guard person I'd see working for Therod.
"See Nidget I told you we just wait long enough and we'd find something of interest."
"In the hallway outside of the place we were looking?"
"Gods work in myterious ways."
"Shut up the both of you unless you want to die where you stand." Their leader didn't seem like a very nice person, and he wasn't, but you know I haven't met any group of murderous cult people who are! Which kind of seems the point when you run a murder cult. Which these people totally were in case that wasn't obvious. Anyway how will we survive? How will we get out of this scary predicament? Unexpectedly, well not really unexpectedly, but you know thats tomorrows entry!
Wednesday, April 17, 2013
The Cleanliness Is A Cover
"No 'Hey Nidget great to see you sorry for bailing on your and Andre, how are you doing'." Nidget was back in town if you couldn't guess from his bitching. We were on our way up to the apartment Jenkins rented in a decently middle income area. I had Nidget there for the obvious entry difficulties.
"Nidget I could say something like that, but I honestly do not care how you are doing, or what happened to you and Andre, its the same reason when you ask where I was I don't tell you, because you don't care." I was pleasantly surprised Nidget was back in town, and I immeadiately roped him into helping me, because when committing crime for the law of the land, its best to have a witness to go down with you. That and I'm terrible with modern locks, just terrible.
"That, that actually makes sense and I thank you for the honesty even if it means your an asshole who just admitted you don't listen to me when I tell you how my day went." Its a double edged sword being honest, well not really, I again don't care what people think about what I say! Clearly I mean I'm writing this down about Nidget when I know he reads my journal, that speaks volumes about me.
"Just open the door Nidget." We had been standing in front of it for a minute or two, now I hoped there weren't multiple short guys with mustache's named Jenkins who were tax collectors, because if there were we were going to be really embarrased barging into his house.
The apartment was a small mid level unit with a bathroom and one bedroom. Jenkins furnishing was sparse. A chair, a near empty book case, a picture of a meadow on the wall. If the place had come furnished and Jenkins hadn't changed it, it would not have surprised me. The level of dust on things was a bit of a surprise, it spoke to him not being there in a while (I know my dust from my own comings and goings). The bedroom was a bed and a closet with some clothing that all looked similar. Bathroom was clean but again dusty.
"Now I'm positive someone killed him."
"Oh yes the evidence is clear all around in the nothing has been disturbed, moved or otherwise hassled, are we done here?"
"Done? Nidget we are just starting!"
"Joyous you know next time I say I'll help you remind me what that means."
"I don't see why I'd do that, it would only prevent you from helping me."
"Right I forgot you're so self centered."
"I'd remind you of that, but..." I'll be honest this conversation looped a couple times, tomorrow I'll go into the Jenkins obvious murder scene more. Because you know I love giving you tastes little journal OF MY BRILLIANCE!
"Nidget I could say something like that, but I honestly do not care how you are doing, or what happened to you and Andre, its the same reason when you ask where I was I don't tell you, because you don't care." I was pleasantly surprised Nidget was back in town, and I immeadiately roped him into helping me, because when committing crime for the law of the land, its best to have a witness to go down with you. That and I'm terrible with modern locks, just terrible.
"That, that actually makes sense and I thank you for the honesty even if it means your an asshole who just admitted you don't listen to me when I tell you how my day went." Its a double edged sword being honest, well not really, I again don't care what people think about what I say! Clearly I mean I'm writing this down about Nidget when I know he reads my journal, that speaks volumes about me.
"Just open the door Nidget." We had been standing in front of it for a minute or two, now I hoped there weren't multiple short guys with mustache's named Jenkins who were tax collectors, because if there were we were going to be really embarrased barging into his house.
The apartment was a small mid level unit with a bathroom and one bedroom. Jenkins furnishing was sparse. A chair, a near empty book case, a picture of a meadow on the wall. If the place had come furnished and Jenkins hadn't changed it, it would not have surprised me. The level of dust on things was a bit of a surprise, it spoke to him not being there in a while (I know my dust from my own comings and goings). The bedroom was a bed and a closet with some clothing that all looked similar. Bathroom was clean but again dusty.
"Now I'm positive someone killed him."
"Oh yes the evidence is clear all around in the nothing has been disturbed, moved or otherwise hassled, are we done here?"
"Done? Nidget we are just starting!"
"Joyous you know next time I say I'll help you remind me what that means."
"I don't see why I'd do that, it would only prevent you from helping me."
"Right I forgot you're so self centered."
"I'd remind you of that, but..." I'll be honest this conversation looped a couple times, tomorrow I'll go into the Jenkins obvious murder scene more. Because you know I love giving you tastes little journal OF MY BRILLIANCE!
Tuesday, April 16, 2013
Its A Working Theory
"Its been a day and you have a working theory?" Therod was sitting at her desk alone, the rest of our staff were out patrolling the streets or sleeping or doing whatever Guard people do when they aren't on staff. She wasn't wearing her full uniform (the Guard uniform is blue pants, undershirt, and jacket with rank, the jacket was off). It was a more casual look for her and I almost forgot she was a real asshole, almost.
"I work fast, you want the best you..."
"Don't go to you, but go on." I glared at her interruption.
"The merchants in my area killed him!" It seemed obvious, I was surprised Therod had not already come to the same conclusion.
"The Merchants killed the tax collector? Why?"
"To avoid paying taxes!"
"They all paid their taxes." She had adjusted herself from sitting with a lean to sitting straight up, at the same time she withdrew a ledger showing me monetary amounts.
"They were skimming the actual taxes!"
"I checked with the treasury their ammounts line up with the ledger, neither Jenkins nor the Merchants were skimming." I swear this theory sounded great until all these facts showed up.
"They are guilty! They treated me very badly when I asked!"
"Lorentino, this may surprise you, but people do not like you, ergo they treated you badly because they don't like you, on top of that I have all this information BECAUSE I ALREADY LOOKED INTO ALL OF THAT!" She slammed the ledger closed and glared at me, I glared back.
"Well that doesn't mean my theory doesn't work."
"Get out, I'm sorry I even asked you, just get out, go back to selling bullshit, I'll find Jenkins." Any other day I'd be happy to be dismissed, but screw that! I was totally more committed now that Therod didn't think I could do it! I'd show her who could figure out who killed Jenkins! (Me, I was going to find him). I just had to figure out where in the five fires this jerk lived. Seriously no one knew that, it was weird. And that was the start to the actual solution of who killed Jenkins (and yes he was dead, if that wasn't obvious).
"I work fast, you want the best you..."
"Don't go to you, but go on." I glared at her interruption.
"The merchants in my area killed him!" It seemed obvious, I was surprised Therod had not already come to the same conclusion.
"The Merchants killed the tax collector? Why?"
"To avoid paying taxes!"
"They all paid their taxes." She had adjusted herself from sitting with a lean to sitting straight up, at the same time she withdrew a ledger showing me monetary amounts.
"They were skimming the actual taxes!"
"I checked with the treasury their ammounts line up with the ledger, neither Jenkins nor the Merchants were skimming." I swear this theory sounded great until all these facts showed up.
"They are guilty! They treated me very badly when I asked!"
"Lorentino, this may surprise you, but people do not like you, ergo they treated you badly because they don't like you, on top of that I have all this information BECAUSE I ALREADY LOOKED INTO ALL OF THAT!" She slammed the ledger closed and glared at me, I glared back.
"Well that doesn't mean my theory doesn't work."
"Get out, I'm sorry I even asked you, just get out, go back to selling bullshit, I'll find Jenkins." Any other day I'd be happy to be dismissed, but screw that! I was totally more committed now that Therod didn't think I could do it! I'd show her who could figure out who killed Jenkins! (Me, I was going to find him). I just had to figure out where in the five fires this jerk lived. Seriously no one knew that, it was weird. And that was the start to the actual solution of who killed Jenkins (and yes he was dead, if that wasn't obvious).
Monday, April 15, 2013
Ok So No One Actually Likes Me
"Don't touch that." I was in the shop across the street from me, he was an antiquities dealer (so technically was I, though he just sold old things and I really sold whatever would sell, so we were competition but not really).
"Oh please I'm not going to break one of your fake antiques, they are made so sturdy I don't think a simple touch could break them." See thats the nice thing about being as old as I was, I knew when something was more bullshit than real having seen the actual thing when it was made. Its why I didn't buy many antiques myself, they were mostly fakes, especially in a country that just came out of a big war.
"Its not fake, you're just an idiot." The shop keepers name was Harold, we had been neighbors since the end of the war, and we never talked, mostly because I knew he faked things and he smelled, and I do not fake things and do not smell (well most of the time, sometimes I can't help it).
"Whatever Harold, look I'm trying to find Jenkins have you seen him?" He got a perplexed look on his face.
"The tax collector?"
"Yes short has a mustache."
"Yes Lorentino I know who Jenkins is, why do you need to find him want to intimidate him to not pay property taxes?"
"I'm offended by that statement Harold, it came to my attention he's missing and I care deeply about him as a person." Harold shifted behind his desk, looking at me like I was trying to steal something.
"No you don't, you barely care about that shorty that works at your shop let alone any of the rest of us. No Lorentino if I had to guess Captain Therod threatened you with some seceret and now you are out here being her little lap dog, and I will not bow down to that woman, or you, get out of my store." I could see it was pointless talking to Harold (because I'm perceptive!) but I did find out he wasn't a fan of Therod for some reason and so I got a little suspicious. After I got the same reception at several of my other neighborhood shop keepers I grew more suspicious (again because I'm very perceptive). So I had a theory that I just had to tell Therod about, and let me tell you she totally bought it.
No no she didn't.
"Oh please I'm not going to break one of your fake antiques, they are made so sturdy I don't think a simple touch could break them." See thats the nice thing about being as old as I was, I knew when something was more bullshit than real having seen the actual thing when it was made. Its why I didn't buy many antiques myself, they were mostly fakes, especially in a country that just came out of a big war.
"Its not fake, you're just an idiot." The shop keepers name was Harold, we had been neighbors since the end of the war, and we never talked, mostly because I knew he faked things and he smelled, and I do not fake things and do not smell (well most of the time, sometimes I can't help it).
"Whatever Harold, look I'm trying to find Jenkins have you seen him?" He got a perplexed look on his face.
"The tax collector?"
"Yes short has a mustache."
"Yes Lorentino I know who Jenkins is, why do you need to find him want to intimidate him to not pay property taxes?"
"I'm offended by that statement Harold, it came to my attention he's missing and I care deeply about him as a person." Harold shifted behind his desk, looking at me like I was trying to steal something.
"No you don't, you barely care about that shorty that works at your shop let alone any of the rest of us. No Lorentino if I had to guess Captain Therod threatened you with some seceret and now you are out here being her little lap dog, and I will not bow down to that woman, or you, get out of my store." I could see it was pointless talking to Harold (because I'm perceptive!) but I did find out he wasn't a fan of Therod for some reason and so I got a little suspicious. After I got the same reception at several of my other neighborhood shop keepers I grew more suspicious (again because I'm very perceptive). So I had a theory that I just had to tell Therod about, and let me tell you she totally bought it.
No no she didn't.
Friday, April 12, 2013
You Are Taxing My Time
Despite initial no interest, the wetern relics started flying off my shelves (I say relics I have no idea what they were, some kind of cheap stone statue I picked up by a guy who was more than happy to take some precious coins for a huge sack of them). They were carved in a blue stone and depicted various figures of Western lore (having seen some of their gods thats mostly who they were). I'll admit I had to convince people they were good luck charms to actually sell the product, but maybe they were! I mean sure the gods of the lands of the west were pricks and believed in a really warped view of justice, but I'm sure they had good parts too, I mean they got worshipped for a reason right? It's all not really that relevant to my story today, but in case you wanted to know that yes I do actually sell things to keep paying for all the stupid things that people drag me into, there you go. In fact I was waving good bye to a customer when Captain Therod again entered my store and took up my valuable time!
"Captain did you think about these western good luck charms?" I had bumped into her during my sales pitch before and she had quite rudely told me where I could put the charm (it was an uncomfortable place).
"No Mr. Lorentino if I ever buy something from you it will have been on accident."
"Hurtful Captain." As a merchant its always a shame to hear a potential client say she'll never be a client, but you know never say never!
"What do you know about Tax Collection?" It was an odd question, I mean I'd recently paid mine, talked about how I liked paying taxes, but outside of that? Nothing.
"Someone does it? The money gets to the people who need it? The world keeps turning?" To say I was confused was putting it mildly.
"Do you know who your collector normally is?"
"Short guy with a mustache? I think thats the real guy I hope thats the real guy." I hadn't though about it, but man what a scam, tell people you are the property tax guy and then just take their money (not that I would ever do such a thing).
"Yeah that's Jenkins, you don't know where he hangs out do you?" It dawned on me why she was asking, the short guy was missing.
"You mean the man I described by facial hair? Yeah I have no clue about where that guy goes when he's not taking my money, doesn't your government have something like that?" I'm sure Ronerawth did, or does, or will.
"No! Its so frustrating, Jenkins has been missing for two weeks and no one has seen the guy, no one even knew him! They just knew he collected money and returned with it, that was all anyone knew, well that and his name, I don't even know his first name! Or if Jenkins is his first name."
"Wow now I'm feeling dumb for having given my money to someone know one really knows."
"You are so not helping me."
"Can't you talk this out with your guard people, like one of your underlings?" It seemed strange for her to come to me with this, then again when anyone brings anything to me its weird.
"No one cares about Jenkins! And you seem to be the only person who will get involved in stupid things unrelated to you." A precise telling of my life if I ever heard one.
"Damn when you're right you're right, ok ok start from the beginning when did someone notice Jenkins was missing?" And so it came to be I went on a hunt for a person I pay my taxes too, yeah life is weird like that.
"Captain did you think about these western good luck charms?" I had bumped into her during my sales pitch before and she had quite rudely told me where I could put the charm (it was an uncomfortable place).
"No Mr. Lorentino if I ever buy something from you it will have been on accident."
"Hurtful Captain." As a merchant its always a shame to hear a potential client say she'll never be a client, but you know never say never!
"What do you know about Tax Collection?" It was an odd question, I mean I'd recently paid mine, talked about how I liked paying taxes, but outside of that? Nothing.
"Someone does it? The money gets to the people who need it? The world keeps turning?" To say I was confused was putting it mildly.
"Do you know who your collector normally is?"
"Short guy with a mustache? I think thats the real guy I hope thats the real guy." I hadn't though about it, but man what a scam, tell people you are the property tax guy and then just take their money (not that I would ever do such a thing).
"Yeah that's Jenkins, you don't know where he hangs out do you?" It dawned on me why she was asking, the short guy was missing.
"You mean the man I described by facial hair? Yeah I have no clue about where that guy goes when he's not taking my money, doesn't your government have something like that?" I'm sure Ronerawth did, or does, or will.
"No! Its so frustrating, Jenkins has been missing for two weeks and no one has seen the guy, no one even knew him! They just knew he collected money and returned with it, that was all anyone knew, well that and his name, I don't even know his first name! Or if Jenkins is his first name."
"Wow now I'm feeling dumb for having given my money to someone know one really knows."
"You are so not helping me."
"Can't you talk this out with your guard people, like one of your underlings?" It seemed strange for her to come to me with this, then again when anyone brings anything to me its weird.
"No one cares about Jenkins! And you seem to be the only person who will get involved in stupid things unrelated to you." A precise telling of my life if I ever heard one.
"Damn when you're right you're right, ok ok start from the beginning when did someone notice Jenkins was missing?" And so it came to be I went on a hunt for a person I pay my taxes too, yeah life is weird like that.
Thursday, April 11, 2013
Property Taxes Of The Mundane!!!
Returning home from a long trip is always a bit like unpacking a mystery. You have to sort through a bunch of notices left on your door, adjust to your enviroment if it had changed, talk to people who may have missed you (that last one is not really an issue for me, its Nidget and Andre who check in with me and when I got back they weren't around). You end up spending more time dicking around after returning, than you do getting back into the swing of things! Me personally I spent my first day back putting all my wonderful trinkets from the lands of the west on my shelves and calling attention to these amazing opportunities with a big sign. Sadly my first customer wasn't a customer at all it was Captain Therod.
"So you aren't dead?" Can you feel the love?
"Well if I am this is the worst afterlife I've ever heard about, and I've heard about several." She was in a sour mood as always, I don't think that woman was ever happy, ever.
"And I'm sure you've sent people to those after lives no doubt after hearing them pleading not to."
"Why Captain Therod you think so little of me." She really did, I don't know what I ever did to warrant such derision (other than you know being me) but that lady always had it in for me.
"You live down to my expectations Lorentino, but I'm here on official business."
"I haven't been in town for a while what could I have possibly have done to warrant your presence?"
"Property taxes, the treasury has me collecting them after their agent went missing."
"Oh those? Sure one second let me go find my money, they went up right?" She leaned against the doorway a little relieved, even in her sour mood I can spot it.
"Yes they did several store keepers felt the need to remind me of all their problems and yet we charge more money please do not add to them."
"I'd never complain about taxes, I love paying and being a part of a community." Yes even as a merchant and constant complainer I never found the need to whine about taxes, you want a government you have to pay for it! Which is not to say I don't voice my displeasure when certain topics arise, but since I pay into it I think I should have a voice in its governance!
"That's forward thinking of you."
"That and I like to think with my small amount of money I own a part of everyone in this city." I handed her my tax money (gems and precious metals, The Guard was still struggling with creating a common currency).
"And just like that you lost what little good regard I had for you."
"I have to live down to your expectations, do look around I just got some new items in."
"Right I'll be back to make sure they aren't magical some other time." And with that she left, I tell you people just don't seem to like me for whatever reason. I think it must be my cologne (or lake thereof). Sadly for me this wouldn't be my only interaction with Captain Therod, in fact it was the first of many, though in my favor it wasn't actually me that was the issue. For once! I'm the best taxpayer that ever paid his taxes and help solve murders, oops spoiler!
"So you aren't dead?" Can you feel the love?
"Well if I am this is the worst afterlife I've ever heard about, and I've heard about several." She was in a sour mood as always, I don't think that woman was ever happy, ever.
"And I'm sure you've sent people to those after lives no doubt after hearing them pleading not to."
"Why Captain Therod you think so little of me." She really did, I don't know what I ever did to warrant such derision (other than you know being me) but that lady always had it in for me.
"You live down to my expectations Lorentino, but I'm here on official business."
"I haven't been in town for a while what could I have possibly have done to warrant your presence?"
"Property taxes, the treasury has me collecting them after their agent went missing."
"Oh those? Sure one second let me go find my money, they went up right?" She leaned against the doorway a little relieved, even in her sour mood I can spot it.
"Yes they did several store keepers felt the need to remind me of all their problems and yet we charge more money please do not add to them."
"I'd never complain about taxes, I love paying and being a part of a community." Yes even as a merchant and constant complainer I never found the need to whine about taxes, you want a government you have to pay for it! Which is not to say I don't voice my displeasure when certain topics arise, but since I pay into it I think I should have a voice in its governance!
"That's forward thinking of you."
"That and I like to think with my small amount of money I own a part of everyone in this city." I handed her my tax money (gems and precious metals, The Guard was still struggling with creating a common currency).
"And just like that you lost what little good regard I had for you."
"I have to live down to your expectations, do look around I just got some new items in."
"Right I'll be back to make sure they aren't magical some other time." And with that she left, I tell you people just don't seem to like me for whatever reason. I think it must be my cologne (or lake thereof). Sadly for me this wouldn't be my only interaction with Captain Therod, in fact it was the first of many, though in my favor it wasn't actually me that was the issue. For once! I'm the best taxpayer that ever paid his taxes and help solve murders, oops spoiler!
Wednesday, April 10, 2013
Got A Boat To Catch
"So.." We were waiting at the docks, the world had been made right again and The Marked One had seen fit to see me off (I believe it was more was instructed to make sure I was gone but you know I like my way better).
"Why didn't my sword kill my brother?" I had gotten some trinkets to sell in my store, I also had a psuedo promise from my companion that the lands of the west can't keep themselves closed off forever, so they have to start regularly trading with people (people of course being me, exclusivity!)
"Yes, swords no matter who is behind them normally work on people no matter who they believe." Its a common sense belief rooted in reality, so rare for me to have.
"The sword," He withdrew the blade and caused a couple gasps from the dock workers and other passengers awaiting boarding on the ship, "Is an extension of the power I wield, it is no more a regular weapon than your magic." He demonstrated this by changing it into claws and then back to the sword before putting it away.
"Do all Marked Men have that ability?" He chuckled.
"No, this is my burden, a gift from the gods to keep the work going."
"I'm still lost on why you went from leading the army to kill the gods to being their servant, and why some kind of being of justice, why not like the guy who has to clean up shit everyday?" If I were a god and someone tried to kill me that would be my punishment for them, shit cleaner upper forever guy, so anyone who wishes to tempt fate, go ahead and mess with not yet a god but working on it Trezlan Lorentino.
"My sentence has to do with my crime, I tried to kill the Gods and I succeeded in killing one, the god of justice." And suddenly everything made sense, the harsh punishments, the conversions, the power. This poor bastard had ruined justice in these lands and now had to be that god himself.
"Wow thats, wow."
"Yeah its forgotten now that he is gone as I and those like me keep the belief alive, it is thought eventually a new god of justice will once again be in power, but until then the Marked Ones will continue our pursuit of doing whats best for this land."
"Quite the responsibility."
"Its a hard road to walk, but I do not walk it alone even though it feels I do, good bye Trezlan Lorentino, next time you decide to visit make sure to do it legally." And with that the Marked One turned around and left me on the docks with my bags of trinkets. I'd like to say I never saw him again, but I did, but not in the lands of the west... That is of course another story, that I'm sure I'll tell you eventually, probably. Maybe? Look I can't tell you everything, I've done crimes I don't want records of!
"Why didn't my sword kill my brother?" I had gotten some trinkets to sell in my store, I also had a psuedo promise from my companion that the lands of the west can't keep themselves closed off forever, so they have to start regularly trading with people (people of course being me, exclusivity!)
"Yes, swords no matter who is behind them normally work on people no matter who they believe." Its a common sense belief rooted in reality, so rare for me to have.
"The sword," He withdrew the blade and caused a couple gasps from the dock workers and other passengers awaiting boarding on the ship, "Is an extension of the power I wield, it is no more a regular weapon than your magic." He demonstrated this by changing it into claws and then back to the sword before putting it away.
"Do all Marked Men have that ability?" He chuckled.
"No, this is my burden, a gift from the gods to keep the work going."
"I'm still lost on why you went from leading the army to kill the gods to being their servant, and why some kind of being of justice, why not like the guy who has to clean up shit everyday?" If I were a god and someone tried to kill me that would be my punishment for them, shit cleaner upper forever guy, so anyone who wishes to tempt fate, go ahead and mess with not yet a god but working on it Trezlan Lorentino.
"My sentence has to do with my crime, I tried to kill the Gods and I succeeded in killing one, the god of justice." And suddenly everything made sense, the harsh punishments, the conversions, the power. This poor bastard had ruined justice in these lands and now had to be that god himself.
"Wow thats, wow."
"Yeah its forgotten now that he is gone as I and those like me keep the belief alive, it is thought eventually a new god of justice will once again be in power, but until then the Marked Ones will continue our pursuit of doing whats best for this land."
"Quite the responsibility."
"Its a hard road to walk, but I do not walk it alone even though it feels I do, good bye Trezlan Lorentino, next time you decide to visit make sure to do it legally." And with that the Marked One turned around and left me on the docks with my bags of trinkets. I'd like to say I never saw him again, but I did, but not in the lands of the west... That is of course another story, that I'm sure I'll tell you eventually, probably. Maybe? Look I can't tell you everything, I've done crimes I don't want records of!
Tuesday, April 9, 2013
Bringing Power To the Powerless
"You have no power here anymore." The Marked One's Brother (did I ever give his name? I can't recall it right now nor does it matter for obvious reasons) had pulled the green sword out of himself, the light went out on it and he casually tossed it to the ground.
"What have you done?" The Marked One seemed shocked at this turn of events despite his brother basically telling him before things had changed.
"I switched to the winning side, your gods can no longer contain me, you don't own me anymore brother I am my own man." I could hear the guard tromping our way, I started to feel like a caged rat or some other animal that isn't known for being not good.
"You will bring damnation to us all."
"Oh please I'll cast down these gods and become one myself which was our goal in the beginning, until you went crazy brother." A bit more backstory on that whole "kill the gods thing The Marked One was talking about."
"So where's Morley?" I had to ask and interject myself, the brother turned to me with an aghast look like I'd just said a really bad word.
"He told me you'd come Lorentino, he told me to expect some stupid petty insult and that you'd promise death, I told him that I'd kill you, and it seems like I'll get another chance for my master." For all his talk of godhood the brother was beholden to the realy power behind the throne, but I also knew that meant Morley wasn't around, he wouldn't be stupid enough to still be here once I'd appeared (because I somehow manage to survive, also he's not the kind of guy to get directly involved once his plan was in motion).
"Two things you might want to know." He rushed me the fist hit me in the stomach and I swear it felt like he knocked my liver out my ass (he didn't, well I don't think he did it did make my insides ache for a week though).
"And what would those two things be before you die fool?" He heard the click of the hammer, got a shocked look on his face and then the hammer fell and the bullet caught him just below the eye exploding the tissue there and taking the rest of the skull behind it. I shot him again in the other eye to be sure but his lifeless slump and empty corpse was enough to tell me the threat was done (and I did say two things didn't I?)
"Next time you embrace the power of different gods, be sure that those gods aren't beholden to another power entirely." Not that I think my bullets were special, or anything, but if there was one thing I'd known about fire arms, is that they respected no magical ability, no higher power, they were merely hunks of metal hurtled out of metal by gun powder, no magic spirit kept them going, and thus the power was beholden to no man or god (though I'm sure gods would be a lot harder to kill with a pistol, well real gods). The Marked One retrieved his sword the blade once again lit with green energy and he approached the front flap of the tent where the guards of the fallen brother were waiting.
"Any who approach me will die, your leader has fallen, your country will no further be punished by the gods but know the fate of a traitor and know that continued allegiance to the Red Hand will be met with death." He drew a line in the dirt and the line lit up with that same green energy. He didn't have to make true on his threat, true to his belief before the head of the snake dead the soldiers fled back to where they'd come from, I guess when your god has fallen its hard to believe he was a real one. And so our adventure came to a close, mostly, I'll go over the fall out tomorrow naturally.
"What have you done?" The Marked One seemed shocked at this turn of events despite his brother basically telling him before things had changed.
"I switched to the winning side, your gods can no longer contain me, you don't own me anymore brother I am my own man." I could hear the guard tromping our way, I started to feel like a caged rat or some other animal that isn't known for being not good.
"You will bring damnation to us all."
"Oh please I'll cast down these gods and become one myself which was our goal in the beginning, until you went crazy brother." A bit more backstory on that whole "kill the gods thing The Marked One was talking about."
"So where's Morley?" I had to ask and interject myself, the brother turned to me with an aghast look like I'd just said a really bad word.
"He told me you'd come Lorentino, he told me to expect some stupid petty insult and that you'd promise death, I told him that I'd kill you, and it seems like I'll get another chance for my master." For all his talk of godhood the brother was beholden to the realy power behind the throne, but I also knew that meant Morley wasn't around, he wouldn't be stupid enough to still be here once I'd appeared (because I somehow manage to survive, also he's not the kind of guy to get directly involved once his plan was in motion).
"Two things you might want to know." He rushed me the fist hit me in the stomach and I swear it felt like he knocked my liver out my ass (he didn't, well I don't think he did it did make my insides ache for a week though).
"And what would those two things be before you die fool?" He heard the click of the hammer, got a shocked look on his face and then the hammer fell and the bullet caught him just below the eye exploding the tissue there and taking the rest of the skull behind it. I shot him again in the other eye to be sure but his lifeless slump and empty corpse was enough to tell me the threat was done (and I did say two things didn't I?)
"Next time you embrace the power of different gods, be sure that those gods aren't beholden to another power entirely." Not that I think my bullets were special, or anything, but if there was one thing I'd known about fire arms, is that they respected no magical ability, no higher power, they were merely hunks of metal hurtled out of metal by gun powder, no magic spirit kept them going, and thus the power was beholden to no man or god (though I'm sure gods would be a lot harder to kill with a pistol, well real gods). The Marked One retrieved his sword the blade once again lit with green energy and he approached the front flap of the tent where the guards of the fallen brother were waiting.
"Any who approach me will die, your leader has fallen, your country will no further be punished by the gods but know the fate of a traitor and know that continued allegiance to the Red Hand will be met with death." He drew a line in the dirt and the line lit up with that same green energy. He didn't have to make true on his threat, true to his belief before the head of the snake dead the soldiers fled back to where they'd come from, I guess when your god has fallen its hard to believe he was a real one. And so our adventure came to a close, mostly, I'll go over the fall out tomorrow naturally.
Monday, April 8, 2013
And So We Come Close To a Conclusion
After an epic conflict that teters on the boarder of believeability we arrived at the command tent of our enemy (it truely was epic, shame I can't write it down here, we totally didn't just sneak up on them at night in the dark because they had stupidly put their tent against a cliff face no it was an epic battle I'm totally not lying to you!) The tent was darkened as it was night our enemy was laying in a very well adorned wooden bed that must have been a real pain to move around for a temporary residence, but I guess thats the perk of being in charge.
"Watch the front door." That was my edict, to prevent people from coming through a canvas flap I tell you its like The Marked One did not appreciate my martial prowess (I know it made me sad too).
"You mean the flap of the tent? Yeah sure I'll watch that you know and if someone comes up I'll just wave my arms at them to go somewhere else." We were whispering (well I was whispering The Marked One's voice was already gutteral he didn't have to talk that low to "whisper") he looked at me with frustration, look it was a valid point, there was nothing to block should someone come in. I mean I could set fire to the tent, but that was way past counter intuitive and straight into damn stupid.
The Marked One drew his sword and I saw the green energy flowing out of it. He said something to the sleeping brother and then plunged the blade into the man's chest, which caused him to awake and start screaming (personally I would have decapitated him you know FOR THIS EXACT GODS DAMNED REASON!). On top of the jerk waking up and by extension waking up the entire rest of the camp. The damn thing didn't even kill him, he was very much alive just with a rather large sword plunged into his chest (you know a minor bother for most people). He slugged The Marked one and he went flying backwards comically, apparently he had gotten a bit more than just looking younger from Morley's necromancy.
"That was ill advised brother."
"Yeah no shit." That was me because I'm helpful like that. I tell you looking at a guy with a sword sticking out of him, and an entire camp full of his army waking up to come kill us, lead me to believe our plan had some fatal flaws in it that might have needed to be addressed before hand. Maybe.
"Watch the front door." That was my edict, to prevent people from coming through a canvas flap I tell you its like The Marked One did not appreciate my martial prowess (I know it made me sad too).
"You mean the flap of the tent? Yeah sure I'll watch that you know and if someone comes up I'll just wave my arms at them to go somewhere else." We were whispering (well I was whispering The Marked One's voice was already gutteral he didn't have to talk that low to "whisper") he looked at me with frustration, look it was a valid point, there was nothing to block should someone come in. I mean I could set fire to the tent, but that was way past counter intuitive and straight into damn stupid.
The Marked One drew his sword and I saw the green energy flowing out of it. He said something to the sleeping brother and then plunged the blade into the man's chest, which caused him to awake and start screaming (personally I would have decapitated him you know FOR THIS EXACT GODS DAMNED REASON!). On top of the jerk waking up and by extension waking up the entire rest of the camp. The damn thing didn't even kill him, he was very much alive just with a rather large sword plunged into his chest (you know a minor bother for most people). He slugged The Marked one and he went flying backwards comically, apparently he had gotten a bit more than just looking younger from Morley's necromancy.
"That was ill advised brother."
"Yeah no shit." That was me because I'm helpful like that. I tell you looking at a guy with a sword sticking out of him, and an entire camp full of his army waking up to come kill us, lead me to believe our plan had some fatal flaws in it that might have needed to be addressed before hand. Maybe.
Friday, April 5, 2013
I Was Worried It Wasn't Impossible
"So no army, no real plan, no support from your gods, and no hope of success." I think I summed up our situation perhaps best there.
"You're an optimist I take it Mr. Lorentino." They did provide us weird horses, so at least we weren't walking. I'd mention how we got from the cave to the world at large, but I don't really understand how we got there and back myself, some kind of spiritual whatever gods are weird ok lets leave it at that.
"I try to look at the bright side of life, so I know what I'm missing out on by being sent on stupid dangerous missions with little hope of success." See the grass is always greener, because I have to kill the crazy person on my side of the fence that like juggles shorties set on fire (it hasn't happened... yet).
"They will not expect a direct attack on their leadership, and without a head a snake will die."
"Unless its a two headed snake, than the other head will just bite you."
"There are not two headed snakes."
"Totally are."
"I am not getting into an argument with you about snakes Mr. Lorentino, but I am right and you are wrong." There totally are two headed snakes, probably.
"Regardless we'll get to the command tent, kill my brother and end this threat."
"And what about his country?"
"He has several heirs, one of them will bear his curse instead."
"That's really harsh."
"That is his punishment, that he now wishes it on someone else does not make it go away." I tell you its almost like the gods here care more about punishing people than they do actually helping (which puts them on par with gods everywhere, gods are hella petty). When I become a God I'll make sure to be really nice and... nope I'll be the pettiest petty who was ever petty. I know me, you know me, so I guess it understand why Gods are bad, because the people who believe in them are also petty. So it shall be.
"You're an optimist I take it Mr. Lorentino." They did provide us weird horses, so at least we weren't walking. I'd mention how we got from the cave to the world at large, but I don't really understand how we got there and back myself, some kind of spiritual whatever gods are weird ok lets leave it at that.
"I try to look at the bright side of life, so I know what I'm missing out on by being sent on stupid dangerous missions with little hope of success." See the grass is always greener, because I have to kill the crazy person on my side of the fence that like juggles shorties set on fire (it hasn't happened... yet).
"They will not expect a direct attack on their leadership, and without a head a snake will die."
"Unless its a two headed snake, than the other head will just bite you."
"There are not two headed snakes."
"Totally are."
"I am not getting into an argument with you about snakes Mr. Lorentino, but I am right and you are wrong." There totally are two headed snakes, probably.
"Regardless we'll get to the command tent, kill my brother and end this threat."
"And what about his country?"
"He has several heirs, one of them will bear his curse instead."
"That's really harsh."
"That is his punishment, that he now wishes it on someone else does not make it go away." I tell you its almost like the gods here care more about punishing people than they do actually helping (which puts them on par with gods everywhere, gods are hella petty). When I become a God I'll make sure to be really nice and... nope I'll be the pettiest petty who was ever petty. I know me, you know me, so I guess it understand why Gods are bad, because the people who believe in them are also petty. So it shall be.
Thursday, April 4, 2013
Inside Voices Not Inside My Head Voices
"You must forgive Lorentino my gods, he does not understand how precarious his position is." People always apologize for me, I usually make them wish they didn't, such is the way I live life.
"HE WILL RECOGNIZE OUR AUTHORITY OR HE WILL SUFFER!" The lead female god's voice reverberated in my head, it was painful, I swear Gods never appreciate how awful it is to hear them talk.
"Can we tone it down a little bit, the ears in my brain are ringing." The lead god looked at me like a dog would when you scold it for farting and then to my amazment the voice softened.
"You are lucky to hear our voice and not perish, but we understand it can harm lesser beings." The Marked One also seemed a little surprised at the change, I personally welcomed it, anything that lead to less shouting in my head (well less shouting than normal) is appreciated.
"Well I thank you for the courtesy, but I doubt you brought us here to discuss how I'm lesser to you."
"We did not bring you here, our servant did, he feels he has to attone for his failings." I almost felt sadness in the voice, as if she was sad he felt that way.
"I do my lords, my brother seeks to reunite the brotherhood, and he has been aided by an outsider, I have failed in my duties." He kneeled to them I prefered standing even in the presense of gods I bow to no one.
"We had forseen this would happen, it is no more your fault than a passing storm sweeping the land, you have done well and honored your oath to us Marked One this will not mark you further." He relaxed if only a little, I noted of course they did not say he was absolved of his crime, just that he would not be punished further.
"I still spared this man against my oath even." As always I am the greater problem, country about to unite under a new regime and try and take over the world? Not really a problem, some asshole necromancer who got kidnapped and brought to their country against their will? Totally huge issue.
"You did well to spare him, as that was our will, he is a bad man yes, and his continued survival will only lead to more pain and suffering in this world, but he will be a force for good if only out of his own self interest, as he will no doubt aid you in the conflict ahead." I'm glad as long as I'm accidentally useful my horribleness is ok. I mean that, I have to accidentally be helpful more often.
"So what do you want from us?" The Marked one penance completed returned to the problem at hand.
"We want you to go to war." I almost passed out from the stupidity of it, a necromancer and some bastard play thing of the gods. Yeah we were totally going to win against an army lead by an immortally young elder backed by a necromancer of untold power. Let me tell you I thought we had it all wrapped up already!
"HE WILL RECOGNIZE OUR AUTHORITY OR HE WILL SUFFER!" The lead female god's voice reverberated in my head, it was painful, I swear Gods never appreciate how awful it is to hear them talk.
"Can we tone it down a little bit, the ears in my brain are ringing." The lead god looked at me like a dog would when you scold it for farting and then to my amazment the voice softened.
"You are lucky to hear our voice and not perish, but we understand it can harm lesser beings." The Marked One also seemed a little surprised at the change, I personally welcomed it, anything that lead to less shouting in my head (well less shouting than normal) is appreciated.
"Well I thank you for the courtesy, but I doubt you brought us here to discuss how I'm lesser to you."
"We did not bring you here, our servant did, he feels he has to attone for his failings." I almost felt sadness in the voice, as if she was sad he felt that way.
"I do my lords, my brother seeks to reunite the brotherhood, and he has been aided by an outsider, I have failed in my duties." He kneeled to them I prefered standing even in the presense of gods I bow to no one.
"We had forseen this would happen, it is no more your fault than a passing storm sweeping the land, you have done well and honored your oath to us Marked One this will not mark you further." He relaxed if only a little, I noted of course they did not say he was absolved of his crime, just that he would not be punished further.
"I still spared this man against my oath even." As always I am the greater problem, country about to unite under a new regime and try and take over the world? Not really a problem, some asshole necromancer who got kidnapped and brought to their country against their will? Totally huge issue.
"You did well to spare him, as that was our will, he is a bad man yes, and his continued survival will only lead to more pain and suffering in this world, but he will be a force for good if only out of his own self interest, as he will no doubt aid you in the conflict ahead." I'm glad as long as I'm accidentally useful my horribleness is ok. I mean that, I have to accidentally be helpful more often.
"So what do you want from us?" The Marked one penance completed returned to the problem at hand.
"We want you to go to war." I almost passed out from the stupidity of it, a necromancer and some bastard play thing of the gods. Yeah we were totally going to win against an army lead by an immortally young elder backed by a necromancer of untold power. Let me tell you I thought we had it all wrapped up already!
Wednesday, April 3, 2013
Godsleep
"Get up Lorentino." I hear this so often I tell you between get up and "You're going to die now." I have my entire life story covered. Yep just people telling me to get up, and people telling me to die, I think I've even been told to get up because its time to die which was the accumulation of a life well lived if I ever heard one.
"Just a couple more minutes." I say this even when I wake myself up, I don't know who I'm addressing in that case, probably the god of waking people up.
"AWAKEN!" And I was, the word reverberated in my ears and in my body, clearly The Marked One had called in help, I also noticed we weren't in our mountain meadow but in a damned cave, because of course we were. There were several beings in a green light, I assumed were the Gods the one who had called out to me to awaken was of course in a female form, naturally (I'm not a sexist, just if my day is going to ruined its going to be by a woman, wait that means I'm a sexist, SO BE IT!)
"Funny I don't remember ordering any gods, oh waiter I think you got my order wrong." As in all things being an asshole comes paramount even over dealing with Gods. I could see from the Marked One's grimace that that was the wrong thing to say, but again I care for saying the right thing like I care for being in fashion, not at all.
"LORENTINO YOU SHALL OBSERVE US OR YOU SHALL PERISH!" And with that more people telling me what I had to do came to pass. I'll go into it more tomorrow but I'm in a bit of a rush today I kind of uhh set fire to an orphanage that may or may not have contained a lot of orphans. Funny story that I hope to never have to tell (at least until the statute of limitations runs out on that, is that even a thing? It totally should be).
"Just a couple more minutes." I say this even when I wake myself up, I don't know who I'm addressing in that case, probably the god of waking people up.
"AWAKEN!" And I was, the word reverberated in my ears and in my body, clearly The Marked One had called in help, I also noticed we weren't in our mountain meadow but in a damned cave, because of course we were. There were several beings in a green light, I assumed were the Gods the one who had called out to me to awaken was of course in a female form, naturally (I'm not a sexist, just if my day is going to ruined its going to be by a woman, wait that means I'm a sexist, SO BE IT!)
"Funny I don't remember ordering any gods, oh waiter I think you got my order wrong." As in all things being an asshole comes paramount even over dealing with Gods. I could see from the Marked One's grimace that that was the wrong thing to say, but again I care for saying the right thing like I care for being in fashion, not at all.
"LORENTINO YOU SHALL OBSERVE US OR YOU SHALL PERISH!" And with that more people telling me what I had to do came to pass. I'll go into it more tomorrow but I'm in a bit of a rush today I kind of uhh set fire to an orphanage that may or may not have contained a lot of orphans. Funny story that I hope to never have to tell (at least until the statute of limitations runs out on that, is that even a thing? It totally should be).
Tuesday, April 2, 2013
Exposition of BATTLE!
"So this is all your fault?" I dodged past a dude with a sword and shot him in the back of the head, we were about half way down the hallway, bodies were piling up The Marked One had his own sword out and he was literally cleaving a path forward.
"Well I wouldn't say its all my fault, but yes the base problem for which we are currently involved could be linked back to me overall." One of the men cowered in front of him and it did him no good, his knees were still knocking as his torso went flying in the other direction.
"Yes was all I needed." I threw some flame behind us to keep the charge of clowns entering into the small secret passageway at bay. Sure they could fire arrows (and some did) but the fire also obscured the shots, it also made them flaming arrows, so it came out in the wash.
"I'm not going to take moralization from a murderer who extends his life by murdering others. I have paid for my choices over these hundreds of years Mr. Lorentino, thats at least more than you have done." I would have pointed out that I too had suffered, but some jerk came rushing through the flame and attempted to grab me, I impaled him on my sword and pushed him back, where he tried to crawl towards me, they were anything if not dedicated.
"So you were a general or something?" I had sprinted down the hallway, at the end I could see some of the weird wind riding contraptions. I also saw explosive barrels, my favorite kind.
"Not a general, The General, I united these lands and sought to fight the gods themselves, I failed." We embarked on one of the contraptions (the marked one flew it, or rode it, I have no idea whats the best way of saying that). When we were safely away from the exit I sent a gout of flame backwards, the explosion sent our pursuers who had managed to get by my fire earlier falling to their dooms.
"Was there a reason to fight the gods or just because it was a day that ended in Y."
"There was a reason, but not one that I would tell you Lorentino." I was about to say fair enough but we started plummeting ourselves, apparently the Marked One despite living a long time, had never learned how to ride the winds either (which made the decision to pilot a bit dumber). We crashed into the side of a mountain, thankfully there was a small meadow below where we collided. Unfortunately slamming into a mountain on a wind skiff thingy really really hurts. The marked one didn't seem that bothered by it, but it knocked the wind out of me (ha riding a wind thing knocked the wind out of myself comedy gold) and I hurt all over so I decided best to lay on the ground for a little bit, you know take stock of everything I had just heard. Ok so I also fell asleep, sue me I hadn't slept in a bit and had used a bunch of magic, that takes a lot out of you, you ungrateful jerk reader... Look I'm sorry its been a rough day ok, just read tomorrow's entry I'm sure I'm nicer there.
"Well I wouldn't say its all my fault, but yes the base problem for which we are currently involved could be linked back to me overall." One of the men cowered in front of him and it did him no good, his knees were still knocking as his torso went flying in the other direction.
"Yes was all I needed." I threw some flame behind us to keep the charge of clowns entering into the small secret passageway at bay. Sure they could fire arrows (and some did) but the fire also obscured the shots, it also made them flaming arrows, so it came out in the wash.
"I'm not going to take moralization from a murderer who extends his life by murdering others. I have paid for my choices over these hundreds of years Mr. Lorentino, thats at least more than you have done." I would have pointed out that I too had suffered, but some jerk came rushing through the flame and attempted to grab me, I impaled him on my sword and pushed him back, where he tried to crawl towards me, they were anything if not dedicated.
"So you were a general or something?" I had sprinted down the hallway, at the end I could see some of the weird wind riding contraptions. I also saw explosive barrels, my favorite kind.
"Not a general, The General, I united these lands and sought to fight the gods themselves, I failed." We embarked on one of the contraptions (the marked one flew it, or rode it, I have no idea whats the best way of saying that). When we were safely away from the exit I sent a gout of flame backwards, the explosion sent our pursuers who had managed to get by my fire earlier falling to their dooms.
"Was there a reason to fight the gods or just because it was a day that ended in Y."
"There was a reason, but not one that I would tell you Lorentino." I was about to say fair enough but we started plummeting ourselves, apparently the Marked One despite living a long time, had never learned how to ride the winds either (which made the decision to pilot a bit dumber). We crashed into the side of a mountain, thankfully there was a small meadow below where we collided. Unfortunately slamming into a mountain on a wind skiff thingy really really hurts. The marked one didn't seem that bothered by it, but it knocked the wind out of me (ha riding a wind thing knocked the wind out of myself comedy gold) and I hurt all over so I decided best to lay on the ground for a little bit, you know take stock of everything I had just heard. Ok so I also fell asleep, sue me I hadn't slept in a bit and had used a bunch of magic, that takes a lot out of you, you ungrateful jerk reader... Look I'm sorry its been a rough day ok, just read tomorrow's entry I'm sure I'm nicer there.
Monday, April 1, 2013
Bushels of Fun
Why not just burn the arrows? A simple question (or a simpler why not just burn the archers?) Well arrows in flight are dangerous, sure I can easily set fire to the wood shafts leading to the hardened metal heads, but unless I really turn up the juice all I've done is create flaming arrows with super heated arrow heads. Doesn't mean I don't still do it of course (because some hope is better than no hope), but in case you're wondering why I fear being shot up into a pin cushion there you go. The brother of Tizan had stepped out the back (damned secret passages!) a part of his entourage in tow. Myself and The Marked one remained archers had their bows drawn arrows at the ready.
"This turned out exactly as I thought it would." They all took ready to fire and I brought up my own power, it was again a risk, but I'd rather die to possibly super heated metal arrow shafts I tried to stop, then you know stand there and look stupid (well stupider). Time seemed to slow down, I heard the order to fire and I brought forward a wall of flame, I could see the flaming bits of arrow coming at me and I ducked hoping my robes would somehow block arrows (look when you're about to get shot up like an inverse porcupine you do silly things). Instead of the chunk of flesh and the burning pain I heard the clang of steel on steel and the clatter of objects hitting the ground. The Marked One's formerly sheathed sword was now out, its green blade large and glowing.
"That was a mistake." Moving supernaturally fast he made short work of the archers. Like I was still breathing heavy when he impaled three people on his sword, kicked those three guys into a fourth, pulled the blade out and beheaded a fifth. It wasn't natural ability, I figured the Marked Ones were granted something, but this went above and beyond simple extra power granted an executioner. He finished and shook the blood and gore off his blade, which left a larger puddle than I prefer to write down.
"I thought you didn't take out your sword."
"I never said that, I just prefered not to, I also prefered to not have to murder people just following orders, but once you've crossed that line all that's left is bodies and regret." The sword returned to its sheathe, I swear I felt for just a brief moment the world snapping back to a normal reality, like when it was out something was off and I just now noticed it since it had returned to the way it was before.
"So we pursue your brother and kill him too?"
"He's already gone, I'm sure he'll have gotten on an airship to elsewhere, more men will be waiting for us and we'll have to fight our way out of the city." He said it like a foregone conclusion, he was right, but still I could sense regret.
"Well why keep them waiting?" I had my revolver drawn and ready.
"Indeed Mr. Lorentino, Indeed."
"This turned out exactly as I thought it would." They all took ready to fire and I brought up my own power, it was again a risk, but I'd rather die to possibly super heated metal arrow shafts I tried to stop, then you know stand there and look stupid (well stupider). Time seemed to slow down, I heard the order to fire and I brought forward a wall of flame, I could see the flaming bits of arrow coming at me and I ducked hoping my robes would somehow block arrows (look when you're about to get shot up like an inverse porcupine you do silly things). Instead of the chunk of flesh and the burning pain I heard the clang of steel on steel and the clatter of objects hitting the ground. The Marked One's formerly sheathed sword was now out, its green blade large and glowing.
"That was a mistake." Moving supernaturally fast he made short work of the archers. Like I was still breathing heavy when he impaled three people on his sword, kicked those three guys into a fourth, pulled the blade out and beheaded a fifth. It wasn't natural ability, I figured the Marked Ones were granted something, but this went above and beyond simple extra power granted an executioner. He finished and shook the blood and gore off his blade, which left a larger puddle than I prefer to write down.
"I thought you didn't take out your sword."
"I never said that, I just prefered not to, I also prefered to not have to murder people just following orders, but once you've crossed that line all that's left is bodies and regret." The sword returned to its sheathe, I swear I felt for just a brief moment the world snapping back to a normal reality, like when it was out something was off and I just now noticed it since it had returned to the way it was before.
"So we pursue your brother and kill him too?"
"He's already gone, I'm sure he'll have gotten on an airship to elsewhere, more men will be waiting for us and we'll have to fight our way out of the city." He said it like a foregone conclusion, he was right, but still I could sense regret.
"Well why keep them waiting?" I had my revolver drawn and ready.
"Indeed Mr. Lorentino, Indeed."
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