Ordinarily when I wake up I wake up in a foul mood (shocking right?) I'm not a morning person, or an afternoon person or a night person; I'm a "sleep was better than this shit" person. I know as soon as I wake up the worst part of my day is about to begin. It's weird for someone who clings to life I hate living it at times. Anyway I say all of that because when I woke up after being released from prison I felt more spring in my step. It wasn't just because I wasn't going to be arrested. It felt like I had touched some really potent magic and came away with that power instead of just scorched. I figured it was due to my connection to the Fire God and some lingering gift of hers, or maybe from when I was touched by the wind whatever (is it weird I've so much interaction with the gods and yet at the same time do not want to believe in them? Kind of weird right). I would have kept thinking that until well Hanlon came to see me, to gloat or whatever it is Hanlon does normally when he's not leading rebellions or whatever.
"Something feels different about you." Hanlon had swung in to check up on me so he claimed. I think he just wanted to know if the Fire God was hanging around.
"Well I did feel more peppy when I woke up this morning, maybe I ate something good last night."
"Right food can make you surge with magical power that's for sure." Hanlon's dry sarcasm wounded me.
"Could be something residual from the fire god."
"Or it could be you have used necromancy haphazardly for so long it was bound to bounce something bad back at you, and now it has." He got to the point and I appreciated that, but at the same time, what????
"But I feel fine, better than fine!"
"For now Trezlan, but be careful what you are dealing with now could possibly destroy you, or empower you, you know either way." He left and I glared angrily at the door. As usual he told me something I didn't know and then left me with something to think about that scared me. Because Hanlon is a prick! And he wasn't wrong and things were about to get a lot worse.
Friday, November 28, 2014
Thursday, November 27, 2014
New Partners Same Dance
Seated at a table shackles locked on my wrists an interrogator in front of me I realized I'd been here before. Several times before, the people change positions, the charges change, but ultimately its the same dance. I've become such and old hat at it I mentally critique my interrogators. I don't outwardly do it since that's a good way to turn a charge into something I might actually be arrested for, but this guy was kind of a loser. Rumpled outfit, smelled slightly. If I didn't know any better I'd figure the Guard didn't actually want these murders solved (they actually didn't because they suspected the Fire God herself did them and yeah you don't screw with a god, let alone one with Fire in her name). Still I couldn't help but feel disrespected.
"Thanks for coming down Mr. Lorentino." I held up my shackles as if to show it wasn't my choice.
"Well you guys were so polite in your invitation."
"Do you have a reason to want to kill members of the Followers of Fire?" His way of talking was that of a clerk asking names off a sheet.
"Are you trying to get me to admit to why I would be guilty of crimes? Guardsman that is insulting." He had a sheet he was reading, when I mentioned the insulting bit he looked up briefly, I couldn't really see his lips through an unkempt beard but it appeared he was chewing on something.
"Forgive me sir, but I'm just trying to figure out what happened, there are twenty people dead and you are known to use fire magic."
"Yeah magic not incineration! You know how hard it is to burn something to ash? Extremely difficult, doing it twice would push me into corruption alone. I get that you non magicals think that magic is well magical, but it has its limits, and the bodies the papers have reported on would be literally impossible for me to do, I could take you to the morgue to show you if you want to see a body burn in person." I was frustrated, though you have to remember I did kill those men, so I was angry about being accused of doing a crime I actually did, just not in the manner that I did it.
"That'll be all Mr. Lorentino."
"Well then unshackle me and let me go."
"When you're story checks out." It took me a few hours for my story to "check out" whatever that means. They gave me crap about not leaving town but its not like I was going to leave anyway. All the same I tell you authority sucks! I was glad I got out of jail when I did, because it was cold in town and the prison had poor heating!
"Thanks for coming down Mr. Lorentino." I held up my shackles as if to show it wasn't my choice.
"Well you guys were so polite in your invitation."
"Do you have a reason to want to kill members of the Followers of Fire?" His way of talking was that of a clerk asking names off a sheet.
"Are you trying to get me to admit to why I would be guilty of crimes? Guardsman that is insulting." He had a sheet he was reading, when I mentioned the insulting bit he looked up briefly, I couldn't really see his lips through an unkempt beard but it appeared he was chewing on something.
"Forgive me sir, but I'm just trying to figure out what happened, there are twenty people dead and you are known to use fire magic."
"Yeah magic not incineration! You know how hard it is to burn something to ash? Extremely difficult, doing it twice would push me into corruption alone. I get that you non magicals think that magic is well magical, but it has its limits, and the bodies the papers have reported on would be literally impossible for me to do, I could take you to the morgue to show you if you want to see a body burn in person." I was frustrated, though you have to remember I did kill those men, so I was angry about being accused of doing a crime I actually did, just not in the manner that I did it.
"That'll be all Mr. Lorentino."
"Well then unshackle me and let me go."
"When you're story checks out." It took me a few hours for my story to "check out" whatever that means. They gave me crap about not leaving town but its not like I was going to leave anyway. All the same I tell you authority sucks! I was glad I got out of jail when I did, because it was cold in town and the prison had poor heating!
Wednesday, November 26, 2014
Thanks For the Warning
I was alone in my office just waiting. I knew she'd be around, either to gloat or thank me, I just had to wait (its not like I could summon her or anything she was a god, possibly going to be THE god according to Hanlon, so I waited). I waited a long time it felt like hours since the last murder, but she showed up, not there one minute there the next, I'd gotten used to the trick with Hanlon, though he at least did it out of my eye sight to create the possibility I just didn't notice him, she appeared out of thin air, though I could feel heat in the room, so where ever she came from it was hot, which made sense.
"Glad to see you can do as you are told Trezlan."
"No thanks, no good job, just happy I followed your orders?"
"I'm a god what do you want a pat on the head?" I didn't actually want a pat on the head, not from someone who had threatened me with burning alive.
"Didn't bother to tell me they were working for Morley?"
"Figured that out on your own did you? No of course not one of them must have confessed in some misguided attempt to keep you from killing them."
"No I figured it out." She smiled, it was an actual warm smile (pardon the pun), but it was still upsetting.
"Sure you did of course Trezlan, as to answer your question, I wanted to see how dedicated you were to me, you killed those people because I told you to, not because you wanted to harm Morley. And you did that perfectly, so thank you Trezlan I'll remember this next time I ask of you." She turned around as if to leave.
"That's it we're done?"
"We're done, well I'm done you're about be arrested on suspicion of twenty homicides, oh and keep the hand, but keep it safe ok? I'd recommend hiding it the unworthy as you have found are devoured by it."
"Wait I'm about to be arrested?" And then she was gone, and the police were there and I was arrested. I was able to hide the hand (a box under my floor boards next to the other pistol that was a god hand, I had to laugh about that because it seemed silly, like I was collecting the damn things for some reason). Thankfully I wasn't actually charged but I'll get to that, you know I will... Probably. I might unleash that entry about economics I've warned about!
"Glad to see you can do as you are told Trezlan."
"No thanks, no good job, just happy I followed your orders?"
"I'm a god what do you want a pat on the head?" I didn't actually want a pat on the head, not from someone who had threatened me with burning alive.
"Didn't bother to tell me they were working for Morley?"
"Figured that out on your own did you? No of course not one of them must have confessed in some misguided attempt to keep you from killing them."
"No I figured it out." She smiled, it was an actual warm smile (pardon the pun), but it was still upsetting.
"Sure you did of course Trezlan, as to answer your question, I wanted to see how dedicated you were to me, you killed those people because I told you to, not because you wanted to harm Morley. And you did that perfectly, so thank you Trezlan I'll remember this next time I ask of you." She turned around as if to leave.
"That's it we're done?"
"We're done, well I'm done you're about be arrested on suspicion of twenty homicides, oh and keep the hand, but keep it safe ok? I'd recommend hiding it the unworthy as you have found are devoured by it."
"Wait I'm about to be arrested?" And then she was gone, and the police were there and I was arrested. I was able to hide the hand (a box under my floor boards next to the other pistol that was a god hand, I had to laugh about that because it seemed silly, like I was collecting the damn things for some reason). Thankfully I wasn't actually charged but I'll get to that, you know I will... Probably. I might unleash that entry about economics I've warned about!
Tuesday, November 25, 2014
The Grandest Plan!
"You're a dumb dumb person." Iris had four of her goons behind me, I still had the hand though, because no one wanted to touch it. The office had a nice view of the city, though I had to wonder how strong the windows were in case I had to leap out of one (even though it was a fairly far way to fall, I could have gotten lucky and like hit a cart full of hay or something). Iris was a fairly attractive older lady, pale skin regal features, short hair, I didn't see a ring on her finger, but perhaps when interrogating people she took it off.
"I've heard that before, it never usually ends well for the person telling me that." I heard a laugh from behind me, but I was being deadly serious (well as serious as I could be). I did have my hands in front of me, they gave me that much of a courtesy. I was also seated and not restrained to the chair, not that it would have made much of a difference either way.
"You're shackled in a chair and I have four guards all armed, I don't think I'm in any danger from you." There was a certain air of arrogance about her statement, I was going to love to prove her wrong.
"Sure sure, all of your guards and still you're terrified of me I can see it in your eyes." I could not actually see it in her eyes. She laughed of course.
"The only thing I'm afraid of is how you figured us out. Morley chose us for how unconnected to each other we were, and yet you methodically wiped us out without a single miss, that's impressive, so who helped you?"
"Helped? Please, Morley for all his intelligence makes mistakes all the same." This was a total bullshit bluff, but man alive here I thought I was just killing people who were trying to ruin the Fire God's reputation, turns out they were double agents (and none of the legends mention this facet at all, proving once and for all how bullshit legends are).
"Right the great Trezlan Lorentino, someone so stupid Morley specifically said not to kill you because you as it would be a waste of time? I'm shaking in my boots." Arrogance is my thing gods damn it! It was insulting to see it thrown in my face like this.
"I am Trezlan Gods Damned Lorentino lady, and you're just one more name on a list." The shackles melted away (a great effect, but gods damn did it hurt) and I pulled the Hand, despite having unloaded it earlier it was fully loaded when I pulled the trigger and Iris disintegrated. The four guards were too stunned to even pull the trigger so I shot them all to death as well. My task completed I took the stairs down, I'm sure the guards that were left in the building didn't expect me to get free, let alone kill their boss so they didn't even react or rush the stairs or anything. I was able to leave the building as non chalantly as I had arrived.
See I told you I had a damn plan!
"I've heard that before, it never usually ends well for the person telling me that." I heard a laugh from behind me, but I was being deadly serious (well as serious as I could be). I did have my hands in front of me, they gave me that much of a courtesy. I was also seated and not restrained to the chair, not that it would have made much of a difference either way.
"You're shackled in a chair and I have four guards all armed, I don't think I'm in any danger from you." There was a certain air of arrogance about her statement, I was going to love to prove her wrong.
"Sure sure, all of your guards and still you're terrified of me I can see it in your eyes." I could not actually see it in her eyes. She laughed of course.
"The only thing I'm afraid of is how you figured us out. Morley chose us for how unconnected to each other we were, and yet you methodically wiped us out without a single miss, that's impressive, so who helped you?"
"Helped? Please, Morley for all his intelligence makes mistakes all the same." This was a total bullshit bluff, but man alive here I thought I was just killing people who were trying to ruin the Fire God's reputation, turns out they were double agents (and none of the legends mention this facet at all, proving once and for all how bullshit legends are).
"Right the great Trezlan Lorentino, someone so stupid Morley specifically said not to kill you because you as it would be a waste of time? I'm shaking in my boots." Arrogance is my thing gods damn it! It was insulting to see it thrown in my face like this.
"I am Trezlan Gods Damned Lorentino lady, and you're just one more name on a list." The shackles melted away (a great effect, but gods damn did it hurt) and I pulled the Hand, despite having unloaded it earlier it was fully loaded when I pulled the trigger and Iris disintegrated. The four guards were too stunned to even pull the trigger so I shot them all to death as well. My task completed I took the stairs down, I'm sure the guards that were left in the building didn't expect me to get free, let alone kill their boss so they didn't even react or rush the stairs or anything. I was able to leave the building as non chalantly as I had arrived.
See I told you I had a damn plan!
Monday, November 24, 2014
A Little Harder Than Expected
The final name on my list was the current head of the Followers of Fire, which meant that I couldn't just like sneak up on her in an alley and shoot her dead (my preferred method for killing the names on the list, hilariously even as I killed a bunch of them they didn't prepare very much, I believe because I did it pretty much all in one week, and they didn't even know people were dead until I'd killed several of them). No she had a whole retinue of people around her at all times, it was kind of annoying. I was thinking I could just burn her to death from a distance instead of shooting her with the hand, but her damn army people kept one of those magical canceling things around and I didn't want to roast my stupid ass (also the hand was leaving no trace other than ashes, using my magic would cause a direct link). So instead of trying to arrange a murder like a normal person I decided to just swing in to her main headquarters and kill her there. Yes that was my plan, no I'm not that smart at times.
So I strolled into the main headquarters hand of the fire god in a shoulder clutch, big jacket on to try and hide that and not much else. I did like that the Hand for whatever reason despite being intensely magical did not trip any magical sensor at all (there were stupid little magic checkers all over the city to try and dissuade people from bringing in artifacts of unknown magical origin, they were easy to bypass though err I have no idea how to bypass one, never mind moving on). The man at the front desk was clearly more bodyguard than secretary, the fact he had a rifle near him kind of gave that away.
"Trezlan Lorentino loremaster here to see Iris Shade."
"Names not on the list." He didn't look at a list that I could see.
"Well its more of an impromptu thing, I want to document the church's ascension from lowly worshipers in the dirt to the big religion you are today." He didn't flinch at the insult to the church, they don't actually recognize their roots much anymore, which told me he wasn't a follower.
"No you aren't."
"I'm not?"
"No you're here to kill Iris Shade." I could hear boots tromping through hallways.
"What ever makes you think I'd want to do that?"
"Because we aren't idiots Mr. Lorentino." He went for his rifle and I drew the hand and burned him down.
"Sure you aren't." He was dead but you know the pithy one liner demanded to be said anyway! I turned around and there were a lot more of them than I expected (twenty by a quick headcount).
"Put the pistol down and get down on your belly." At least they didn't just shoot me, this was amazingly enough part of my plan. I let them shackle me and they took the hand (or they tried to, the first person who touched it was vaporized, after that they made me unload the magazine and let me keep it in my clutch). And then I was on my way up to see Iris. All part of my plan. Serious! Read next entry and then try and tell me I wasn't completely brilliant!
So I strolled into the main headquarters hand of the fire god in a shoulder clutch, big jacket on to try and hide that and not much else. I did like that the Hand for whatever reason despite being intensely magical did not trip any magical sensor at all (there were stupid little magic checkers all over the city to try and dissuade people from bringing in artifacts of unknown magical origin, they were easy to bypass though err I have no idea how to bypass one, never mind moving on). The man at the front desk was clearly more bodyguard than secretary, the fact he had a rifle near him kind of gave that away.
"Trezlan Lorentino loremaster here to see Iris Shade."
"Names not on the list." He didn't look at a list that I could see.
"Well its more of an impromptu thing, I want to document the church's ascension from lowly worshipers in the dirt to the big religion you are today." He didn't flinch at the insult to the church, they don't actually recognize their roots much anymore, which told me he wasn't a follower.
"No you aren't."
"I'm not?"
"No you're here to kill Iris Shade." I could hear boots tromping through hallways.
"What ever makes you think I'd want to do that?"
"Because we aren't idiots Mr. Lorentino." He went for his rifle and I drew the hand and burned him down.
"Sure you aren't." He was dead but you know the pithy one liner demanded to be said anyway! I turned around and there were a lot more of them than I expected (twenty by a quick headcount).
"Put the pistol down and get down on your belly." At least they didn't just shoot me, this was amazingly enough part of my plan. I let them shackle me and they took the hand (or they tried to, the first person who touched it was vaporized, after that they made me unload the magazine and let me keep it in my clutch). And then I was on my way up to see Iris. All part of my plan. Serious! Read next entry and then try and tell me I wasn't completely brilliant!
Friday, November 21, 2014
A Legend in the Making
One nice thing about living a long time is you see how full of shit legends really are. I don't mean like "Oh that's not exactly true but mostly right." No I mean how completely made up and not at all truthful they really are at all! And I don't mean just the ones I created (its a hobby of mine to plant made up stories over the years, and when I say hobby I mean complete accident brought on by me being a huge liar and story teller... but not this journal everything in here is 100% truthful!).
Like there is a legend about a man who found cursed treasure and his entire family was killed as a result of the curse. Its a nice simple legend, has a moral be careful about treasure etc etc. Not true at all! What the actual story was, was complete asshole thief robbed a bunch of people in town, the towns folk got up and murdered his entire family! The legend actually obscures horrible vigilante justice! That's generally what real legends are, they hide history people don't want to confront!
I bring up all of this of course because my work for the fire god caused an entirely new legend to emerge. The first couple kills just had people wondering what could make someone disintegrate like the hand was causing them to and who was killing followers of fire. Then shortly after I was about halfway done with the killings it came out the Fire God herself was smiting her followers for not respecting her, towards the end the legend had mutated that it was actually a creature who hated the Fire God destroying her worshipers trying to punish the fire god (I may have started this one...)
It was an interesting example of how over the course of twenty people being murdered how the legend twisted and turned. Eventually I'm sure it'll be that the Fire God herself struck down the unbelieving in the streets during a reign of blood! Maybe I'll spread that one. All the same I only had one person left on my list, but it was the current leader of the church, and crazily enough she actually prepared for my arrival. What a jerk!
Like there is a legend about a man who found cursed treasure and his entire family was killed as a result of the curse. Its a nice simple legend, has a moral be careful about treasure etc etc. Not true at all! What the actual story was, was complete asshole thief robbed a bunch of people in town, the towns folk got up and murdered his entire family! The legend actually obscures horrible vigilante justice! That's generally what real legends are, they hide history people don't want to confront!
I bring up all of this of course because my work for the fire god caused an entirely new legend to emerge. The first couple kills just had people wondering what could make someone disintegrate like the hand was causing them to and who was killing followers of fire. Then shortly after I was about halfway done with the killings it came out the Fire God herself was smiting her followers for not respecting her, towards the end the legend had mutated that it was actually a creature who hated the Fire God destroying her worshipers trying to punish the fire god (I may have started this one...)
It was an interesting example of how over the course of twenty people being murdered how the legend twisted and turned. Eventually I'm sure it'll be that the Fire God herself struck down the unbelieving in the streets during a reign of blood! Maybe I'll spread that one. All the same I only had one person left on my list, but it was the current leader of the church, and crazily enough she actually prepared for my arrival. What a jerk!
Thursday, November 20, 2014
No One is a Good Man
I had the hand of the fire god in a shoulder clutch (it looked like any modern pistol now, it was weird how it changed appearance almost as if to disguise itself). I had the list of names in my pocket and a drink in my hand, because getting a quest like this necessitates drinking. Valrym kept his distance, I was pretty sure he could sense the power I had with me. I was about to say something to him to try and start the dialogue when a hand clapped down on my shoulder, it was Hanlon. Thankfully I was seated at a table and not the bar, though I don't care that other people hear me, I don't like talking with Hanlon in public, if only because I'm afraid he'll kill me for disclosing some secret I didn't know was a secret.
"I love the smell of a god in the morning, smells like trouble." I continue to be amazed at Hanlon's ability to sense gods I'd almost think he was one, but what would he be the god of? Smugness? Secrets? I don't think there is a god of weaponry.
"You're always so chipper when you know I'm screwed."
"You're not screwed I'm sure, I see a list of names and you've got the hand of the fire god, I'm going to make a quick assumption and guess she wants you to kill the men on the list?"
"And one lady." Her name was at the top, I assumed that meant she was in charge (I was right).
"And you're thinking you're screwed because?"
"They're high ranking church officials, a church that was recently one all about combat, which tells me these people will be highly protected."
"Recently is a matter of opinion Trezlan, but I can assure you their protection isn't that good, its a side effect of being all conflict can be personal like they went to, means you stop thinking people will try and kill you." Of course Hanlon would know about the types of body guards that a member of the church would have, I should not have been surprised at all. Still despite him saying that I didn't exactly believe it.
"So I guess I should go out there and get the job done and stop delaying?"
"Unless you have some kind of conscience about killing people or something? Which I can't imagine you do. Might think they are innocent or not bad people."
"No on is a good person, not here, and especially not people who run a religion, I'm just trying to decide if I do this if I'll actually be free and clear."
"What you should be worried about is if the entity you were talking to is the fire god. Otherwise you'll just be killing the fire god's followers for some thing else thus pissing off the real one." I admit I hadn't thought of that particular issue. I took the Fire God at full face value.
"Wow thanks now I'm all the more terrified of doing this."
"I'm just screwing with you, though you do tend to take entities at their word and you really shouldn't. Though I'd recommend doing this for the good fire lady because her power is exponential and soon enough we'll stop thinking about gods and more about god, if you take my drift." Hanlon was the master of making you feel better one moment and then crushing you with depression the next. I finished my drink nodded at Hanlon and left, I had some killing to do.
Wednesday, November 19, 2014
Negotiations of the Fire God
"No, does no work for you,? no." I was not about to burn to death a bunch of people on the word of a god. I normally do that when they upset me, or I'm having a bad day or some other spurious reasoning! But not just because a god told me so. She smiled after she pouted a bit.
"Come on haven't you just wanted to truly let got and burn everything?"
"I did that once, I was corrupted beyond belief and was a scourge on the city I burned a lot of people."
"And how did that make you feel?"
"Awful."
She frowned, "You're no fun! I swear for someone who is what you are, you take no joy in being it." I was lot as to what she was alluding to, but years of dealing with Hanlon had trained me with this kind of speak in half tones bullshit.
"So if there isn't anything else there's the door you can see yourself out of it."
"Oh throwing me out like so much last nights trash? Have you forgot what I am and what you owe me? I saved you from damnation at least twice, and I can burn you alive." With the last statement I felt all of my body be extremely hot like my blood was boiling, it was brief but the threat had been repeated this time with the physical effect. The fire god then smiled and clapped her hands together. "Ok so you won't burn a bunch of people to death that's fine I guess fine be that way, what you can do for me, is kill a specific group of people, just some malcontents ruining my religion."
"You mean making your religion into a family friendly affair devoid of martial combat?"
"I mean turning my followers from the true spirit of belief in me and weaking me as a result, kill them and I'm sure the idiots will return to the way they are supposed to worship."
"And you can't do this because?"
"Stupid rules I agreed to with other gods, I can help my people, or this pathetic orb, but I can't direct them to worship properly! My hands are tied."
"But you can have someone else do it for you?"
"Well special people sure, you're one of them, a loop hole of sorts." I keep being terrified by god politics, even more so when they are threatening to burn me to death.
"And if I say no you'll incinerate me."
"Well I don't want to say I'll set your testicles on fire and turn your penis into charcoal."
"But you literally just did." She smiled and then produced a scroll with names blackened into it, gods never updated to type writers. And then she disappeared as suddenly as she was there. The list was twenty gods damned names deep though! But seeing as I wanted to keep my jangly bits not currently on fire I decided best to follow what she said.
"Come on haven't you just wanted to truly let got and burn everything?"
"I did that once, I was corrupted beyond belief and was a scourge on the city I burned a lot of people."
"And how did that make you feel?"
"Awful."
She frowned, "You're no fun! I swear for someone who is what you are, you take no joy in being it." I was lot as to what she was alluding to, but years of dealing with Hanlon had trained me with this kind of speak in half tones bullshit.
"So if there isn't anything else there's the door you can see yourself out of it."
"Oh throwing me out like so much last nights trash? Have you forgot what I am and what you owe me? I saved you from damnation at least twice, and I can burn you alive." With the last statement I felt all of my body be extremely hot like my blood was boiling, it was brief but the threat had been repeated this time with the physical effect. The fire god then smiled and clapped her hands together. "Ok so you won't burn a bunch of people to death that's fine I guess fine be that way, what you can do for me, is kill a specific group of people, just some malcontents ruining my religion."
"You mean making your religion into a family friendly affair devoid of martial combat?"
"I mean turning my followers from the true spirit of belief in me and weaking me as a result, kill them and I'm sure the idiots will return to the way they are supposed to worship."
"And you can't do this because?"
"Stupid rules I agreed to with other gods, I can help my people, or this pathetic orb, but I can't direct them to worship properly! My hands are tied."
"But you can have someone else do it for you?"
"Well special people sure, you're one of them, a loop hole of sorts." I keep being terrified by god politics, even more so when they are threatening to burn me to death.
"And if I say no you'll incinerate me."
"Well I don't want to say I'll set your testicles on fire and turn your penis into charcoal."
"But you literally just did." She smiled and then produced a scroll with names blackened into it, gods never updated to type writers. And then she disappeared as suddenly as she was there. The list was twenty gods damned names deep though! But seeing as I wanted to keep my jangly bits not currently on fire I decided best to follow what she said.
Tuesday, November 18, 2014
Pawn of the Fire God
I sat there dumbfounded that the fire god was in my office. She didn't have all of her trappings of before, now she was wearing a red suit (fitting I guess) with a bright red shirt and tie. She almost looked like a lawyer or some other business professional. I didn't see a weapon, but I guess much like her followers she had switched to a more subdued style. She had short red hair as well, spiked in the front, who styles the hair of the gods? I have no idea.
"Whatever it is you think I did, I did not do it." Best to start at the place of do not destroy me for existing.
"Please Trezlan if I was here to annihilate you I would have done so before you even turned around, burned you from the inside out." She got close and I could feel the energy just bouncing from inside her. Like I'd been near her before, but this was intimately more personal and very much more intimidating. She basically told me she could blow me up, and I believed her.
"Mordere set me up I take it." It was the obvious choice, he gave me her hand, and knew I'd eventually touch it.
"Set up is so," She paused briefly to consider language, "Pedestrian, I like to think of arranged, but yes Mordere did arrange for you to have my weapon and assumed you'd need to use it as he had several children he knew would come for the weapon."
"So you want something from me?"
"Always getting right to business, why can't you just enjoy my company? I am the god you should be following instead of worshiping death like you do, sure you have extended your life, but I give you the power of life and death with your fire, if not for me you wouldn't have your necromancy." I've long wondered if the gods are any way associated with magic, I have noticed fire is a more common magical ability where as something like shifting is not (fire from the fire god, shifting from chaos? Who is dead maybe), but found no proof of this. Honestly I don't believe the Fire God was telling the truth about magical ability here either, Gods are like that, I mean warfare is not exactly an honest thing, and so the god of it wouldn't be some bastion of honesty either (I don't think there is a god of honesty because no one in this gods damned world could sustain that!)
"I don't worship death."
"Oh please you reek of it and your interactions with it, its infused in every essence of your being though I do sense the stink of another on you now, I swear Trezlan you could have just asked me for a favor I would have maybe obliged you." She ran a hand over my bald head and what little hair I had up there from my last shaving was gone instantly, she flashed her teeth and I could see a hinge of fire behind them. Whatever form she had taken she cared not to hide too much what she was.
"Get to what you want please." She flashed a pouty face.
"Fine straight to business, I need you to do something for me."
"And that is?"
"I want you to burn my followers alive."
"Oh." I have to admit I should have seen this coming.
"Whatever it is you think I did, I did not do it." Best to start at the place of do not destroy me for existing.
"Please Trezlan if I was here to annihilate you I would have done so before you even turned around, burned you from the inside out." She got close and I could feel the energy just bouncing from inside her. Like I'd been near her before, but this was intimately more personal and very much more intimidating. She basically told me she could blow me up, and I believed her.
"Mordere set me up I take it." It was the obvious choice, he gave me her hand, and knew I'd eventually touch it.
"Set up is so," She paused briefly to consider language, "Pedestrian, I like to think of arranged, but yes Mordere did arrange for you to have my weapon and assumed you'd need to use it as he had several children he knew would come for the weapon."
"So you want something from me?"
"Always getting right to business, why can't you just enjoy my company? I am the god you should be following instead of worshiping death like you do, sure you have extended your life, but I give you the power of life and death with your fire, if not for me you wouldn't have your necromancy." I've long wondered if the gods are any way associated with magic, I have noticed fire is a more common magical ability where as something like shifting is not (fire from the fire god, shifting from chaos? Who is dead maybe), but found no proof of this. Honestly I don't believe the Fire God was telling the truth about magical ability here either, Gods are like that, I mean warfare is not exactly an honest thing, and so the god of it wouldn't be some bastion of honesty either (I don't think there is a god of honesty because no one in this gods damned world could sustain that!)
"I don't worship death."
"Oh please you reek of it and your interactions with it, its infused in every essence of your being though I do sense the stink of another on you now, I swear Trezlan you could have just asked me for a favor I would have maybe obliged you." She ran a hand over my bald head and what little hair I had up there from my last shaving was gone instantly, she flashed her teeth and I could see a hinge of fire behind them. Whatever form she had taken she cared not to hide too much what she was.
"Get to what you want please." She flashed a pouty face.
"Fine straight to business, I need you to do something for me."
"And that is?"
"I want you to burn my followers alive."
"Oh." I have to admit I should have seen this coming.
Monday, November 17, 2014
Do not Tempt The Real Fire God
"Put the box down and step away." It was a man's voice though I suspected at first it would be a female (I guess the most recent daughter having had the power of the fire god once didn't seek it out like this moron did).
"You really want my grand mothers secret recipes? I won't stop you her cake was delicious." I never actually knew my grandmother, at this point I don't even remember her, did I even have one? Questions I'll never care to answer. The gunman had his pistol in my back, it felt like a modern one based on barrel and I didn't hear the hammer hit back, but he might have just been threatening and not intending on killing me.
"Don't bullshit me Lorentino, I know what's in the box, its the only thing my father would leave to someone like you." I turned around and saw the shriveled little punk who confronted me. He had a wispy mustache and baggy clothing. He looked like a dirty vagrant and I could see why Mordere the elder wanted nothing to do with him.
"Someone like me? What ever do you mean by that you little shit? Someone stronger than you? Someone able to kill you with the snap of a finger? Someone who has fought gods and killed them and could just as easily destroy you WITHOUT A THOUGHT? THAT'S WHAT YOU MEANT BY SOMEONE LIKE ME?!?" I admit I'm getting sick and tired of being treated like garbage, especially by some family cast off. he stumbled backwards and ran into one of my shelves, he pulled the hammer back on his pistol (it was modern, but even semi-auto's have a hammer, it taps the trigger for an easier pull).
"Stay back." His voice stammered, he wasn't sold on this.
"Oh now you want me to stay away from you? Big man with a gun? Well let me show you what you came to find!" I opened the box and drew the hand of the fire god, upon touching it was like sticking my hand in molten lava, but I didn't care, I drew the pistol and blasted the lesser Mordere. He was vaporized instantly. My anger dialed back down I put the pistol back into the box, it was draining to have fired it, and draining still to have even touched it. I shouldn't have bothered, but like I said I'm tired of being treated like a child, especially by someone who was a damned child. I almost worried someone would call the local police on me after my display, but I didn't hear boots tromping after me or anything. So I figured I was in the clear. And I was, from the authority anyway.
"Mr. Lorentino I'm so glad you contacted me." I turned around and it was the Fire God. Well it was, but it wasn't. I tell you things have gotten weird in the modern world, and the God's are one of those things that has gotten all screwed up. But as usual next entry blah blah blah. Look I give you a taste!
"You really want my grand mothers secret recipes? I won't stop you her cake was delicious." I never actually knew my grandmother, at this point I don't even remember her, did I even have one? Questions I'll never care to answer. The gunman had his pistol in my back, it felt like a modern one based on barrel and I didn't hear the hammer hit back, but he might have just been threatening and not intending on killing me.
"Don't bullshit me Lorentino, I know what's in the box, its the only thing my father would leave to someone like you." I turned around and saw the shriveled little punk who confronted me. He had a wispy mustache and baggy clothing. He looked like a dirty vagrant and I could see why Mordere the elder wanted nothing to do with him.
"Someone like me? What ever do you mean by that you little shit? Someone stronger than you? Someone able to kill you with the snap of a finger? Someone who has fought gods and killed them and could just as easily destroy you WITHOUT A THOUGHT? THAT'S WHAT YOU MEANT BY SOMEONE LIKE ME?!?" I admit I'm getting sick and tired of being treated like garbage, especially by some family cast off. he stumbled backwards and ran into one of my shelves, he pulled the hammer back on his pistol (it was modern, but even semi-auto's have a hammer, it taps the trigger for an easier pull).
"Stay back." His voice stammered, he wasn't sold on this.
"Oh now you want me to stay away from you? Big man with a gun? Well let me show you what you came to find!" I opened the box and drew the hand of the fire god, upon touching it was like sticking my hand in molten lava, but I didn't care, I drew the pistol and blasted the lesser Mordere. He was vaporized instantly. My anger dialed back down I put the pistol back into the box, it was draining to have fired it, and draining still to have even touched it. I shouldn't have bothered, but like I said I'm tired of being treated like a child, especially by someone who was a damned child. I almost worried someone would call the local police on me after my display, but I didn't hear boots tromping after me or anything. So I figured I was in the clear. And I was, from the authority anyway.
"Mr. Lorentino I'm so glad you contacted me." I turned around and it was the Fire God. Well it was, but it wasn't. I tell you things have gotten weird in the modern world, and the God's are one of those things that has gotten all screwed up. But as usual next entry blah blah blah. Look I give you a taste!
Friday, November 14, 2014
I Thought He Was Dead Already
"You know you'd be less scary if you just told people you were a mortician." The tall man was named Barrow and he was an undertaker as if my initial dialogue entry there wasn't a clue or anything. The men with him were his assistants. It at least explained the clothing.
"Actually I used to introduce myself as an undertaker and that scared people more." We were seated in Barrow's office, it was pleasant enough for an office where you go when someone dies (very sparse furniture wood tones so as to not be too threatening the complete opposite of the giant that was Barrow).
"I could see how that can happen, why did you become an undertaker in the first place?" He looked at me oddly like no one had ever asked him the question before.
"I'm a people person Mr. Lorentino." I couldn't tell if that was a joke or not, he seemed sincere and so I left it at that. I was with the undertaker because Mordere had died and left me something, I thought he was dead already, I swear I wrote that he died not too long ago (this is the reason I write this journal so as to not forget things I should know, now I'm wondering if time periods are blending in my head, oh gods best to not think about that). He produced a box and put it on the table I knew the box, and so I knew probably what was inside it, what I didn't know is why he was giving it to me.
"Is that all?"
"Yes everything else was given to the church." I nodded I didn't want to grab the box or even open it, I thought I was done with that pistol, but unfortunately Mordere the evil bastard had other plans.
"Why didn't this go to his family?"
"While Mr. Mordere had several children this box was specifically not to be given to any of them, which they all understood. In his instruction he left a note saying a blood line is imperfect but Lorentino is eternal. Which I have no clue what that mans Mr. Lorentino, other than I don't want to know what it means." I nodded and took the box.
"Will there be a funeral for people to pay their respects?"
"For an assassin? No, we'll bury the body without headstone and pray that will be the end of it. The church has disavowed Mr. Mordere and his type, they are going for a more welcoming image that that of Sins hiding in the shadows and displays of martial strength." That made me sad, that the Church of the Fire God was becoming more political and less overt, I mean things change, but come on YOU WORSHIP THE GOD OF CONFLICT! Followers these days!
"That's sad."
"That's business, which does lead me to one question, I checked my records and that of my predecessor I have never buried a Lorentino, neither has he. What are you Mr. Lorentino?"
I smiled, "Someone who is eternal obviously." Barrow did not return my smile instead he had the look most people do when they see beyond their station in life. I took my leave of the undertaker and made my way back to my office, trying not to draw any notice that I carried one of the most powerful weapons in creation. Sadly someone already knew and they were waiting for me at my office. No marginally good deed goes unpunished!
"Actually I used to introduce myself as an undertaker and that scared people more." We were seated in Barrow's office, it was pleasant enough for an office where you go when someone dies (very sparse furniture wood tones so as to not be too threatening the complete opposite of the giant that was Barrow).
"I could see how that can happen, why did you become an undertaker in the first place?" He looked at me oddly like no one had ever asked him the question before.
"I'm a people person Mr. Lorentino." I couldn't tell if that was a joke or not, he seemed sincere and so I left it at that. I was with the undertaker because Mordere had died and left me something, I thought he was dead already, I swear I wrote that he died not too long ago (this is the reason I write this journal so as to not forget things I should know, now I'm wondering if time periods are blending in my head, oh gods best to not think about that). He produced a box and put it on the table I knew the box, and so I knew probably what was inside it, what I didn't know is why he was giving it to me.
"Is that all?"
"Yes everything else was given to the church." I nodded I didn't want to grab the box or even open it, I thought I was done with that pistol, but unfortunately Mordere the evil bastard had other plans.
"Why didn't this go to his family?"
"While Mr. Mordere had several children this box was specifically not to be given to any of them, which they all understood. In his instruction he left a note saying a blood line is imperfect but Lorentino is eternal. Which I have no clue what that mans Mr. Lorentino, other than I don't want to know what it means." I nodded and took the box.
"Will there be a funeral for people to pay their respects?"
"For an assassin? No, we'll bury the body without headstone and pray that will be the end of it. The church has disavowed Mr. Mordere and his type, they are going for a more welcoming image that that of Sins hiding in the shadows and displays of martial strength." That made me sad, that the Church of the Fire God was becoming more political and less overt, I mean things change, but come on YOU WORSHIP THE GOD OF CONFLICT! Followers these days!
"That's sad."
"That's business, which does lead me to one question, I checked my records and that of my predecessor I have never buried a Lorentino, neither has he. What are you Mr. Lorentino?"
I smiled, "Someone who is eternal obviously." Barrow did not return my smile instead he had the look most people do when they see beyond their station in life. I took my leave of the undertaker and made my way back to my office, trying not to draw any notice that I carried one of the most powerful weapons in creation. Sadly someone already knew and they were waiting for me at my office. No marginally good deed goes unpunished!
Thursday, November 13, 2014
Stop Guessing You'll Never Guess
"It was money of course you'd take money." Val suddenly cared when I told him the Wind Goddess had granted me a wish. Though as usual he did not believe me when I said it. I had made my way back to town, the rain had mercifully stopped, though the cold was taking up the slack (because you can never have one without the other this time of damn year). I prefer a nice not too hot, not too cold climate. Something that is not possible anywhere, I swear I would have wished for that but the Wind Goddess would have probably just turned me into a fish or something equally horrible. Like I swear when I gave that lady my wish I had it completely written out, she actually frowned at me when I handed it to her. BUT I GOT WHAT I WANTED GODS DAMN IT!
"I did not take money Val." Because money is the root of all evil, on top of that again I'd probably be killed by a huge stack of money or some other horrible thing. I mean look what happened to Elise when she wished for power.
"Than eternal life."
"And wind up as a rock? No just stop guessing I shouldn't have brought it up."
"You brought it up because you wanted to brag, and then you didn't want to tell me because you didn't want me knowing what pact you made with that wind creature who is not a goddess despite what you think." I could sense what was coming next, Val and I had been doing this dance for years.
"I'll see myself out then."
"Make sure you do!" I didn't pay my bill, though he knew I'd be back to pay it so it wasn't like a major thing to do. I was a bit worried by the "she's not a goddess thing." but its not like what I asked for could have some long term horrible consequence years down the road (well it hasn't so far, so uhh fingers crossed!) I was on my way grumbling about a comeback for Val when I bumped into a tall man in a dark suit. Because I pay attention like garbage when I'm angry.
"Trezlan Lorentino?" His voice was booming, almost as loud as he was tall and he was very tall.
"If I say no will you go away."
"No." Quieter this time, but still there.
"Fine that's me lets get going I know no good can come of this." And I was right! Because I always am.
"I did not take money Val." Because money is the root of all evil, on top of that again I'd probably be killed by a huge stack of money or some other horrible thing. I mean look what happened to Elise when she wished for power.
"Than eternal life."
"And wind up as a rock? No just stop guessing I shouldn't have brought it up."
"You brought it up because you wanted to brag, and then you didn't want to tell me because you didn't want me knowing what pact you made with that wind creature who is not a goddess despite what you think." I could sense what was coming next, Val and I had been doing this dance for years.
"I'll see myself out then."
"Make sure you do!" I didn't pay my bill, though he knew I'd be back to pay it so it wasn't like a major thing to do. I was a bit worried by the "she's not a goddess thing." but its not like what I asked for could have some long term horrible consequence years down the road (well it hasn't so far, so uhh fingers crossed!) I was on my way grumbling about a comeback for Val when I bumped into a tall man in a dark suit. Because I pay attention like garbage when I'm angry.
"Trezlan Lorentino?" His voice was booming, almost as loud as he was tall and he was very tall.
"If I say no will you go away."
"No." Quieter this time, but still there.
"Fine that's me lets get going I know no good can come of this." And I was right! Because I always am.
Wednesday, November 12, 2014
Not a Very Fair Sacrifice
"She demands blood, and I figure your blood is the best I can offer, the last time I gave her my family and this is what I got." Elise was a horrific monster, and not just for the sacrificing her family part though that does seem pretty awful. Her body was all wrong, arms were double the size of her legs and were bent and twisted with too much muscle. Her fingers weren't all the same size and each one ended in a nasty claw. She wasn't wearing any clothes anymore, though its not like it was very tittilating to see her ugly misshapen naked body, it was revolting.
"A sacrifice usually is something from yourself not someone else." That's not entirely accurate of anything really, but I was shackled by a horrible monster who had been a wonderful young woman not to long before (why did she look one way before and now horrific? Side effect of her wish, she didn't specify properly her power and so outside of a super concentrated effort the monster before me was what she really looked like, I like to think it was an outer portrayal of her inner turmoil, but that was just me personally).
"Oh Trezlan if you weren't such an idiot you'd be endearing." I've heard this so many times. So the monster had me down and out, my hands shackled behind my back and there I was waiting for death when the wind goddess showed up. Now I've seen the Fire God (this seems like a brag because it is) and she is gorgeous, but the wind goddess is beyond beauty, like in my dreams when I think of true beauty I think of the wind goddess (sorry future ladies I'll disappoint). I won't even bother trying to describe her (also I think her appearance changed based on the person who perceives her, as the descriptions I read looked nothing like the wind goddess I saw).
"Children." Her voice was like a musical instrument, even with a simple one word sentence of children.
"Wind Goddess I bring you a gift for the slaughter grant me my wish!" The goddess looked at me and back to the twisted shape of Elise.
"I have already given you a gift, I see that you are unhappy with your strength."
"I'm hideous! You promised me power!"
"And you have power, you have strength and speed others wish they had, you did not care for your looks nor specify you wanted to keep them." She stalked to the wind goddess and looked to strike the goddess which I knew was a bad idea and as soon as she raised an arm she was annihilated. Elise vanquished the goddess turned to me with a smile. "Sacrifice accepted, child what gift can I bestow on you."
This sudden reversal of fortune brought a smile to my face. So what wish did I ask for? You know how this works! Actually I won't tell you because it was personal, let me just say that I didn't ask for money because I was really worried I'd get turned into money.
"A sacrifice usually is something from yourself not someone else." That's not entirely accurate of anything really, but I was shackled by a horrible monster who had been a wonderful young woman not to long before (why did she look one way before and now horrific? Side effect of her wish, she didn't specify properly her power and so outside of a super concentrated effort the monster before me was what she really looked like, I like to think it was an outer portrayal of her inner turmoil, but that was just me personally).
"Oh Trezlan if you weren't such an idiot you'd be endearing." I've heard this so many times. So the monster had me down and out, my hands shackled behind my back and there I was waiting for death when the wind goddess showed up. Now I've seen the Fire God (this seems like a brag because it is) and she is gorgeous, but the wind goddess is beyond beauty, like in my dreams when I think of true beauty I think of the wind goddess (sorry future ladies I'll disappoint). I won't even bother trying to describe her (also I think her appearance changed based on the person who perceives her, as the descriptions I read looked nothing like the wind goddess I saw).
"Children." Her voice was like a musical instrument, even with a simple one word sentence of children.
"Wind Goddess I bring you a gift for the slaughter grant me my wish!" The goddess looked at me and back to the twisted shape of Elise.
"I have already given you a gift, I see that you are unhappy with your strength."
"I'm hideous! You promised me power!"
"And you have power, you have strength and speed others wish they had, you did not care for your looks nor specify you wanted to keep them." She stalked to the wind goddess and looked to strike the goddess which I knew was a bad idea and as soon as she raised an arm she was annihilated. Elise vanquished the goddess turned to me with a smile. "Sacrifice accepted, child what gift can I bestow on you."
This sudden reversal of fortune brought a smile to my face. So what wish did I ask for? You know how this works! Actually I won't tell you because it was personal, let me just say that I didn't ask for money because I was really worried I'd get turned into money.
Tuesday, November 11, 2014
No time For Mourning
When I woke up in the morning my camp was empty. Elise had either left or been drug off in the night. I normally would have I dunno cared? But since my life was a happenstance of horrible I just kind of let this slide (it was also raining and windy and you know what I didn't really know Elise that well and I'm lazy so you do the not math on this one). I was a bit sad that in my great moment of triumph I wouldn't have someon there to cheer me on (because that's what I imagined Elise was there to do, not you know steal the wish for herself as she intended). I did notice when she left she took all my supplies with her, another reason I didn't exactly go looking for her, since she had sort of robbed me (ordinarily I might have charged after her for the theft, but I was in a hurry to meet the wind goddess, look things were rushed and precautions were not taken, unlike my normal really careful self...)
Climbing difficult cliffs without the gear I'd brought was a real pain in the ass. Like seriously, it took what should have been a difficult but doable climb, into something that was potentially fatal at each grab (I still continued instead of just going back to get more gear because the Wind Goddess was coming, and I didn't want to miss her). I was kind of surprised there weren't other people attempting to climb the cliffs. I mean the legend wasn't super widely known, but a legend granting wind goddess should have at least brought some other people out (again turns out other people had come out but gotten murdered by the monster that stalked the area). I was also pissed other people weren't there because one of the reasons I didn't just turn back was I was hoping I could uhh borrow someone elses climbing gear (look I'm still an asshole this never goes away).
So soaked to the bone, tired from climbing, and worried someone might have beaten me to the top I managed to scratch my way there only to be greeted by Elise. And by greeted I mean wrenched up by my arm and shackles tossed on my wrists. The creature she was is hard to describe, but I'll try, next entry of course. Got to leave you wanting more.
Climbing difficult cliffs without the gear I'd brought was a real pain in the ass. Like seriously, it took what should have been a difficult but doable climb, into something that was potentially fatal at each grab (I still continued instead of just going back to get more gear because the Wind Goddess was coming, and I didn't want to miss her). I was kind of surprised there weren't other people attempting to climb the cliffs. I mean the legend wasn't super widely known, but a legend granting wind goddess should have at least brought some other people out (again turns out other people had come out but gotten murdered by the monster that stalked the area). I was also pissed other people weren't there because one of the reasons I didn't just turn back was I was hoping I could uhh borrow someone elses climbing gear (look I'm still an asshole this never goes away).
So soaked to the bone, tired from climbing, and worried someone might have beaten me to the top I managed to scratch my way there only to be greeted by Elise. And by greeted I mean wrenched up by my arm and shackles tossed on my wrists. The creature she was is hard to describe, but I'll try, next entry of course. Got to leave you wanting more.
Monday, November 10, 2014
The Difference Between Existence and Living
"So you've lived hundreds of years?" I may have told my new follower a little bit too much about my life. Look when I someone starts listening I tend to forget that I'm supposed to keep some things secret. My new pseudo book smart follower's name was Elise, she was an orphan (aren't we all, though in her case its because she killed her parents, no I didn't know that at this time).
"I wouldn't say I have lived hundreds of years, I would say I have existed for hundreds of years."
"What's the difference?" I smiled, we were seated around a fire near the cliffs. Hilariously despite society advancing all over this area was nothing but untamed wilderness, more things change. Also apparently there was some horrific monster that stalked and killed anyone who tried to live near the cliffs, a legend I read about AFTER I stayed the night out there, because you know you read all these legends think you know whats up and then bam miss the one about the horrible murder monster.
"To live is to say you enjoy the experience, that you have lived it up, personally I have not enjoyed all of my time in this world, in fact I have down right hated some of my years specifically the ones associated with my imprisonment." I wouldn't of course wanted to be dead obviously, but I can say things have obviously not gone my way for a long time.
"So with your wish you hope to fix that?"
"Oh gods no, I intend to ask for money, because money fixes everything." It really really does. Elise and I went to sleep. Well I should I say I went to sleep, Elise disappeared in the night leaving me to wonder who exactly I'd brought along with me to the wind goddess.
"I wouldn't say I have lived hundreds of years, I would say I have existed for hundreds of years."
"What's the difference?" I smiled, we were seated around a fire near the cliffs. Hilariously despite society advancing all over this area was nothing but untamed wilderness, more things change. Also apparently there was some horrific monster that stalked and killed anyone who tried to live near the cliffs, a legend I read about AFTER I stayed the night out there, because you know you read all these legends think you know whats up and then bam miss the one about the horrible murder monster.
"To live is to say you enjoy the experience, that you have lived it up, personally I have not enjoyed all of my time in this world, in fact I have down right hated some of my years specifically the ones associated with my imprisonment." I wouldn't of course wanted to be dead obviously, but I can say things have obviously not gone my way for a long time.
"So with your wish you hope to fix that?"
"Oh gods no, I intend to ask for money, because money fixes everything." It really really does. Elise and I went to sleep. Well I should I say I went to sleep, Elise disappeared in the night leaving me to wonder who exactly I'd brought along with me to the wind goddess.
Friday, November 7, 2014
Finally Someone Who Listens Who Isn't a Prick
"And so the legend of the wind goddess is that she appears every fifty years, no one knows why its every fifty years, or why she appears, but she shows up almost on clock work!" I say almost because the legends were kind of off. The young lady I was talking to was fairly bookish looking, she had on glasses and was carrying a large amount of books, I liked her immediately.
"What is she other than a wind goddess I mean?" She pushed her glasses up at the wind goddess part, if I wasn't so enraptured someone was listening to me I would have noticed her glasses didn't have any glass in them.
"Legend says she grants one person a wish, why again I have no idea, but that's what the legend says, and there are so many corroborating legends." Legends are always reliable except when they aren't. Basically if I wrote the legend, do not count on it (I spread a lot of false info in my early years of being immortal lets just say I have a very poor sense of humor, err had I'm way better now...)
"Why a wish?"
"Because gods are fickle, something about the winds of change or some garbage, look legends aren't exactly historical records." Despite me saying they kind of were... Look don't expect me to be consistent here!
"So she shows up every fifty years grants a wish and leaves? Is there a limit to the wish?"
"Not that I found, though I did read that you have to be very specific in what you want, apparently someone wasn't and they were crushed to death." What he asked for incorrectly that got him crushed to death? Best left to the imagination.
"Wow, this sounds like the quite the legend. So where does she show up?"
"Apparently an altar at the top of some cliffs, part of the ordeal is having to climb the cliffs, and there is apparently some kind of sacrifice to the winds that has to be made, but you know I'm sure I can puzzle it out when I get there." Also a part of the legend was all the rain, one reason I was drawn to the legend in the first place (it explained the torrential down pour we were experiencing).
"You're going to go?" She almost sounded in awe, but looking back this was just a rouse.
"Of course, I have to make sure someone doesn't wish for like eternal darkness or something."
"Can I come with you?" I should have said no, I should have realized this was a trap, but I'm an idiot with an ego so...
"Sure I can always use someone to document my greatness." I'm an idiot.
"What is she other than a wind goddess I mean?" She pushed her glasses up at the wind goddess part, if I wasn't so enraptured someone was listening to me I would have noticed her glasses didn't have any glass in them.
"Legend says she grants one person a wish, why again I have no idea, but that's what the legend says, and there are so many corroborating legends." Legends are always reliable except when they aren't. Basically if I wrote the legend, do not count on it (I spread a lot of false info in my early years of being immortal lets just say I have a very poor sense of humor, err had I'm way better now...)
"Why a wish?"
"Because gods are fickle, something about the winds of change or some garbage, look legends aren't exactly historical records." Despite me saying they kind of were... Look don't expect me to be consistent here!
"So she shows up every fifty years grants a wish and leaves? Is there a limit to the wish?"
"Not that I found, though I did read that you have to be very specific in what you want, apparently someone wasn't and they were crushed to death." What he asked for incorrectly that got him crushed to death? Best left to the imagination.
"Wow, this sounds like the quite the legend. So where does she show up?"
"Apparently an altar at the top of some cliffs, part of the ordeal is having to climb the cliffs, and there is apparently some kind of sacrifice to the winds that has to be made, but you know I'm sure I can puzzle it out when I get there." Also a part of the legend was all the rain, one reason I was drawn to the legend in the first place (it explained the torrential down pour we were experiencing).
"You're going to go?" She almost sounded in awe, but looking back this was just a rouse.
"Of course, I have to make sure someone doesn't wish for like eternal darkness or something."
"Can I come with you?" I should have said no, I should have realized this was a trap, but I'm an idiot with an ego so...
"Sure I can always use someone to document my greatness." I'm an idiot.
Thursday, November 6, 2014
Light Reading
"So this lady shows up every fifty years Val, its almost time for her to show up again!" I had sourced the legend with thirty separate corroborating novels and historical documents. I was very excited, Val was not very excited, he hadn't heard of the legend in which I had become entirely too invested (it was still raining so I didn't exactly have anything else to do, not that I normally do anyway).
"That's great Trezlan why do you think I care?"
"Because you're a student of history!" He was not a student of history, no one was. I swear I was one of the few true historians who actually lived anymore! You know outside of all those scholarly people in colleges and such that study boring history and not the cool stuff like legends and obscure magical rituals.
"Trezlan despite what you believe I'm not a student of anything except food and drink, and since this lady of the air can neither be eaten or drank I care not for her or her legend. And if you aren't going to buy anything else I'm going to ask you to pay up and leave."
"Come on Val, Hanlon didn't want to listen to my story about her either, someone has to care!" He harumphed again pointed at the bill. I paid it (under protest!) and left. I went to the library since I figured someone there would care about my legend. And happily someone there did, sadly they had ulterior motives BECAUSE OF COURSE THEY DID!
"That's great Trezlan why do you think I care?"
"Because you're a student of history!" He was not a student of history, no one was. I swear I was one of the few true historians who actually lived anymore! You know outside of all those scholarly people in colleges and such that study boring history and not the cool stuff like legends and obscure magical rituals.
"Trezlan despite what you believe I'm not a student of anything except food and drink, and since this lady of the air can neither be eaten or drank I care not for her or her legend. And if you aren't going to buy anything else I'm going to ask you to pay up and leave."
"Come on Val, Hanlon didn't want to listen to my story about her either, someone has to care!" He harumphed again pointed at the bill. I paid it (under protest!) and left. I went to the library since I figured someone there would care about my legend. And happily someone there did, sadly they had ulterior motives BECAUSE OF COURSE THEY DID!
Wednesday, November 5, 2014
Rain Rain Go Away
The rain was unending. Upon my return home the bad weather that had mysteriously vanished while we were on the high seas had apparently materialized back home. I swear to the gods it was raining non stop for three frigging weeks. Everywhere you went gutters were full, drains were clogged and puddles were ever present. I found myself having to change clothes more often do to getting splashed or being soaked by the time I got where I was going (buy an umbrella you say, NONESENSE STOP RAINING SAYS I!). I'd have suspected this weather system was the result of evil, but I'd lived in town long enough to know it was just the ficker weather gods screwing with us.
What it meant was I spent an inordinate amount of time in my office. Which sucked since with the weather no one was coming in and all I could do was sit and stare at the little bottle ship Hanlon sent over (it was an exact duplicate of Trezlan the red's ship including and I kid you not actual pirates that moved on it, I was fascinated by what animated them up to and including being terrified that it was actually Trezlan's ship trapped in a bottle for me to be amused by, not terrified enough of course to try and free them naturally). I started to go a bit stir crazy. I normally dislike being trapped in one place for too long because it reminds me of prison, but I also dislike traveling when the weather is awful. So I decided to read some of the books that was lining my walls (I had read or wrote most of them, but my memory gets hazy at times hence this journal).
It was while I was reading these books I came across a curious legend I'd never heard of that I immediately invested way too much time in. What can I say it was raining and I was bored and th is seemed more interesting than being stuck in my office all day! Next entry I'll get into that legend promise!
What it meant was I spent an inordinate amount of time in my office. Which sucked since with the weather no one was coming in and all I could do was sit and stare at the little bottle ship Hanlon sent over (it was an exact duplicate of Trezlan the red's ship including and I kid you not actual pirates that moved on it, I was fascinated by what animated them up to and including being terrified that it was actually Trezlan's ship trapped in a bottle for me to be amused by, not terrified enough of course to try and free them naturally). I started to go a bit stir crazy. I normally dislike being trapped in one place for too long because it reminds me of prison, but I also dislike traveling when the weather is awful. So I decided to read some of the books that was lining my walls (I had read or wrote most of them, but my memory gets hazy at times hence this journal).
It was while I was reading these books I came across a curious legend I'd never heard of that I immediately invested way too much time in. What can I say it was raining and I was bored and th is seemed more interesting than being stuck in my office all day! Next entry I'll get into that legend promise!
Tuesday, November 4, 2014
Soul Sliver Smackdown
"KEEP'EM COMING TREZLAN!" The hold smelled of sulfur and smoke. We had been firing the cannons as soon as we could at the pirate ship, amazingly the shots were hitting and damaging it, but they were also taking their toll on us. Hanlon's ship was leaning heavily to the right, and I could hear the sloshing of water into the ships hold. With each pass we took on the Trezlan The Red's ship we came all the closer to being sunk ourselves. But I and the crew with me kept the cannon's firing, how or why wasn't immediately clear, but we kept firing even when it seemed like it was a futile effort. Where they got the ammunition or powder from I have no idea, but they crew kept ramming shot in and firing shot off. For my part I shouted and pointed well enough (my usual management style).
"I don't think we're winning Hanlon!" A shot ripped through our left side and blew a large hole through our right highlighting that we were not in fact winning this battle.
"You can't see what I do Trezlan, trust me they are more hurt than we are." I didn't believe this sentiment, especially not while the decks of our ship was filling up with water. Fearing we were about to be annihilated I came up with a plan that seemed to stupid to work, but you know those are the best type! So I instructed the men to keep firing (not like they needed me to say that, but you know I had to to feel useful!) and ran up to the cabin to get the soul sliver. The boat was rocking more now, each shot we took causing wood to groan and snap as the ship tried valiantly to stay together. The glowing object in hand I returned to the cannon deck and worked some blood magic into the soul sliver (I had no idea if it would work mind you, as I had no idea what the soul sliver really was at all, this was one of those lets add blood magic to something awful and see if it works out!). My enchanted device in hand I got to one of the cannons currently pointed at the other ship and loaded the soul sliver in. Now I didn't know proper powder loads or any of that crap, so I just threw some of it in with the soul sliver and hoped for the best (why should this be any different than the rest of the way I do things...)
At first I thought maybe I missed, or that my attempt to do something had failed, because nothing happened. And then all of a sudden Trezlan The Red's ship was engulfed in purple flame and the sea went deadly calm. Like one minute we were in the middle of a huge storm and being fired upon, and then the next dead sea and a huge bonfire of purple flame. And then nothing. The ghost ship and its pirates were gone, the soul sliver was still in tact though (Hanlon somehow reacquired it from the ocean floor later, how I have no idea and prefer to not know).
So there ended my attempt to help ghost pirates. I never did get to hear what Hanlon's plan was for the soul sliver, or what it really was to begin with. But he was moderately happy with the outcome and most of his pirate crew made it home safely, so all in all a horrific trip I was immediately thankful was over!
"I don't think we're winning Hanlon!" A shot ripped through our left side and blew a large hole through our right highlighting that we were not in fact winning this battle.
"You can't see what I do Trezlan, trust me they are more hurt than we are." I didn't believe this sentiment, especially not while the decks of our ship was filling up with water. Fearing we were about to be annihilated I came up with a plan that seemed to stupid to work, but you know those are the best type! So I instructed the men to keep firing (not like they needed me to say that, but you know I had to to feel useful!) and ran up to the cabin to get the soul sliver. The boat was rocking more now, each shot we took causing wood to groan and snap as the ship tried valiantly to stay together. The glowing object in hand I returned to the cannon deck and worked some blood magic into the soul sliver (I had no idea if it would work mind you, as I had no idea what the soul sliver really was at all, this was one of those lets add blood magic to something awful and see if it works out!). My enchanted device in hand I got to one of the cannons currently pointed at the other ship and loaded the soul sliver in. Now I didn't know proper powder loads or any of that crap, so I just threw some of it in with the soul sliver and hoped for the best (why should this be any different than the rest of the way I do things...)
At first I thought maybe I missed, or that my attempt to do something had failed, because nothing happened. And then all of a sudden Trezlan The Red's ship was engulfed in purple flame and the sea went deadly calm. Like one minute we were in the middle of a huge storm and being fired upon, and then the next dead sea and a huge bonfire of purple flame. And then nothing. The ghost ship and its pirates were gone, the soul sliver was still in tact though (Hanlon somehow reacquired it from the ocean floor later, how I have no idea and prefer to not know).
So there ended my attempt to help ghost pirates. I never did get to hear what Hanlon's plan was for the soul sliver, or what it really was to begin with. But he was moderately happy with the outcome and most of his pirate crew made it home safely, so all in all a horrific trip I was immediately thankful was over!
Monday, November 3, 2014
Ahoy Or Some Other Garbage
"I look ridiculous" I was wearing a billowing white shirt (that had gotten completely soaked as soon as I stepped foot on the deck because of the rain and the sea), it was that kind of frilly style people associate with the sea but no seaman has ever worn ever. I also had a jacket with gold embroidery all over it and a weird hat from a style of hat that was also never really in style. I looked like Hanlon, which was completely insane. At least the pants were normal, if only very baggy, and the boots were nice and sturdy.
"You look fantastic ahoy Trezlan! We are chasing those damned pirates of the damned down now!" Hanlon was having an actual good time, it was terrifying.
"Who are these people anyway?" The other pirates Hanlon had with him looked fairly menacing, all huge biceps and tattoos, and equally dressed like I was although the lower rank version of it clearly.
"Employees."
"You made your employees crew a pirate ship for you?" It was outrageous! I knew Hanlon cared little for humans, but this seemed to be more than the usual.
"They are getting paid time and a half and they get to keep the outfits! People jumped at the chance unlike you they recognize its a once in a life time experience to crew a ship, and chase pirates! Ghost pirates even!"
"We're all going to die, we're all going to die lead by a mad man."
"That's the spirit Trezlan! Really bring that cynical pirate aspect on things, Yo ho boys I can smell our prey WE ARE GAINING ON THEM!" I looked off the bow and could see nothing, but Hanlon was oddly right, though how he smelled ghost pirates is best left to the imagination.
"So what's your plan when we run across Trezlan the Red?"
"Well get down below Trezlan, I'll need you to keep my cannons running hot!" I had no words for the insanity, but like the fool I was I went along because clearly it was my lot in life to suffer.
"You look fantastic ahoy Trezlan! We are chasing those damned pirates of the damned down now!" Hanlon was having an actual good time, it was terrifying.
"Who are these people anyway?" The other pirates Hanlon had with him looked fairly menacing, all huge biceps and tattoos, and equally dressed like I was although the lower rank version of it clearly.
"Employees."
"You made your employees crew a pirate ship for you?" It was outrageous! I knew Hanlon cared little for humans, but this seemed to be more than the usual.
"They are getting paid time and a half and they get to keep the outfits! People jumped at the chance unlike you they recognize its a once in a life time experience to crew a ship, and chase pirates! Ghost pirates even!"
"We're all going to die, we're all going to die lead by a mad man."
"That's the spirit Trezlan! Really bring that cynical pirate aspect on things, Yo ho boys I can smell our prey WE ARE GAINING ON THEM!" I looked off the bow and could see nothing, but Hanlon was oddly right, though how he smelled ghost pirates is best left to the imagination.
"So what's your plan when we run across Trezlan the Red?"
"Well get down below Trezlan, I'll need you to keep my cannons running hot!" I had no words for the insanity, but like the fool I was I went along because clearly it was my lot in life to suffer.
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