There are times when you are sitting alone underground being driven insane by a slow watery drip, that you question your life. You wonder for instance where decisions you have made in the past bring you to places in your present you could have easily avoided. You also wonder what the color pink tastes like, and how many seperate imaginary friend converations you have to have before you start to question your sanity (or your existence to begin with, that's always a fun nutty conversation). So it wasn't too startling to see myself in the cell with me. I mean I came to expect this level of nuttery.
"You should have listened to Hanlon." I'm always judgemental of me, its weird.
"Listened what? He just told me I was in over my head, which is the case, ALWAYS! I don't know why he thinks this time was special." This should have been my first clue to maybe just maybe this me was not me, since me didn't know what I knew, which is strange to put down but made perfect sense in retrospect.
"You still know where he is, you can call for his help."
"Locked up in a cellar? Right let me shine my Hanlon signal and he'll be right by to get me." Again me seemed completely unaware of things, but I've grown so used to being crazy I just let it go.
"Trezlan we both know we can't get out of this on our own."
"That's bullshit, I'll figure something out, or I'll suffer for years, have a huge psychotic break and then, well at least I won't have to worry about sanity!" The first one happened, not the second, though I do write to my journal like I speaking to an audience. The other me who wasn't actually me persisted and we chatted, mostly about my conditions, but he kept being insistent on Hanlon. I never knew I fixated on Hanlon so much in my life, and turns out I actually don't. Crazy eh?
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